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Can I call?


wakeboard_28

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I have decided to ove on with my life after being in what I thought was an awesome relatonship. My question is is should I call her after I broke contact with her 3 weeks ago. Just to see how she is doing and let her know that I still care for her and when I said I didn't want to talk to her was because I was made at her for leaving was only because I was mad at her. I don't think I want to have another relationship with her but wanted to know if it would be good to call her and see how she is doing.

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What would be the purpose in calling? Let her move on with her life and you move on with yours. You don't need to know how she's doing. She will need to find other sources of support and you don't need that kind of information about somebody who is no longer in your life.

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maybe you should call ehr to see how things are. but wait a little bit longer. its always good to have friends. never good to have enemies. so give it a little time an then call her. just be friends. who knows she might be able to help you out in the future with other relationships.

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I don't see anything wrong with calling to see how she is - it is just thoughtful and as adaidas says better to be friends than enemies.

What's with this current fashion of having to pretend the other doesn't exist anymore?

Nothing wrong with a thoughtful call.

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Thanks for the advice adidas and Brave girl. I think I will wait a little longer till I contact her. I would rather have her as a friend than totally alienate someone that I once had a good relationship with.

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It depends on how you broke up and why.

 

I almost always stay friends with someone I've just dated causally. However, if it's a broken long term relationship....I don't want them as a friend OR an enemy.....I just want to forget I ever knew them.

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How can you forget you ever knew them?

What is wrong with being friends - if there was friendship within the relationship why should it die too?...

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I agree with Arabess, if it was a real serious long term relationship I am not up for having anything to do with the person once the relationship is done. My reasoning is that I got that close to that person and to have them as anything less, would never be satisfying and probably be more painful than anything. It's hard to be so intimate with someone and accept them into such a serious role for a long period of time and then be ok with them serving a lesser role and you serving a lesser role in there life. Once you've been the top priority in someones life it is hard to accept that you are now a 5th and 6th priority.

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I tried to call her once or twice over thanksgiving but she wasn't home she was with her family. Ihave decided not to call her. This is due to the fact that my friend said she is with another guy now. This part of it doesn't bother me because I am getting over her pretty well. I don't feel it would be any good for her if I call since I don't want to be the one who seems desperate and can't let her live he life because I'd be bothering her.

 

Does anyone feel this is a good decision on my part or what?

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I think that's the best thing you can do right now man, she will probably end up realizing what she has lost a while from now and come back to you anyway, but just stick strong and forget about it for now.

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I want to thank you. It would make me feel better if she does end up realizing that she made a mistake. This would show me that I was the best person I could be. I'd feel like I had accomplished something for myself and not her.

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