Jump to content

Girlfriend doesn't want my brother to hold our baby


bobcaticus

Recommended Posts

Lucky for you two (I guess??) that she got pregnant so easily. With the irregular periods, lack of ovulation, blood sugar and obesity issues, and high testosterone levels, most women have to seek fertility treatments to have a baby.

Link to post
Share on other sites
I just realized a very important factor here.....

 

Is she still pregnant? If she is, there will be little chance of reasoning with her.

:laugh:

 

HEY! I'll have you know I have many periods of rational thought at the moment. (just not in a row... ;))

 

 

She's 18.

 

Well this is quite important.

 

She is using the baby as a bartering chip at the moment, which is wrong, but she's obviously too immature to see that.

 

When you are pregnant, you do tend to avoid people or situations that stress you out, and she is probably doing this to an extent, however the amount of discussion you are having about it defeats this purpose as its stressing you BOTH out.

 

I would just sit tight and not discuss it with her at the moment- you will probably achieve more after the baby is born.

Link to post
Share on other sites

What Silverfish said..

 

Just keep talking. Your girl does sound as though she is insecure right now. Is she normally insecure about things? Does she have a family as close as yours? Close families can be intimidating, especially for someone not used to such dynamics. Well, as far as I can see, unless your brother is somehow untrustworthy around children I dont see why he should not see and hold the little one once he/she is here. Its not like he will be around everyday!

 

Just keep talking. I think demanding that he not hold the baby is a very extreme angle for anyone to take. Really you should both be able to discuss anything and everything together without such extreme angles being put on any perceived outcome. Ultimatums are not the way to go at all. Be careful of this.

 

But yeah.. I think she is testing you here.

 

Take care,

Eve xx

Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree to keep talking- but perhaps not talk all the time about that particular issue. talk about other stuff too and reassure her that you will be there for her throughout this.

 

How long has she got to go?

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 3 weeks later...
Peaceful Guy

people aren't possessions and your child has a right to be held and adored by all family members mentally and physically capable of doing so! :)

Edited by Peaceful Guy
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 4 weeks later...
Hi

 

My girlfriend is having our baby, and as much as she loves me, she hates my brother. Because of a couple of incidents that happened ages ago she feels as though he wants to split us up, which maybe he did but I forgave him.

 

She harbors a grudge against my brother and she wants me to tell him that he's not allowed to hold or touch our baby. I don't feel comfortable doing that but she says that it's either I tell him, or she leaves with the baby.

 

As much as my bro can be an ass, he's still my brother, and I love him, but I also love my girlfriend so much, I don't want to lose her. But why should I have to lose one part of my family for her? I don't want to be seen as a "traitor" or as someone who doesn't care for my family. Her family all agree with her, with the general idea that her family is more perfect than mine. However, though my family aren't perfect, we love each other a lot and they'd look after me and our baby. If I tell my family this then they'll think I'm an evil person who doesn't care for my family, but if I don't I'm worse for "always siding" with my family.

 

I'm losing either way, it's either I lose the trust of my brother, and his love, or I lose my girlfriend and our baby.

 

She won't even listen or take the time to compromise with me, and she wants me to do it.

 

Am I being selfish? What should I do?

 

As often happens on LS, you gives us lots of detail but leave out the most important parts. What are the "incidents" that occured between your GF and your brother? You don't even give the smallest clue. How can you expect a helpful response if you won;t say what's wrong?

 

That said, from what you do say, your GF needs to grow up.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...