confusticated Posted November 26, 2003 Share Posted November 26, 2003 hi, i broke up with my girlfriend about 3 months ago because it seemed like all she wanted from me was sex and not a relationship (and some other stuff too but i'm not gonna go into details). we tried "friends with benefits" after we broke up but it didn't really work. so lately we've just been friends. i still love her more than anything in the world and i want to get back together with her but i'm not sure how to go about doing this.. she will say that she misses doing stuff with me and gives me hints that she wants to get back together.. so i asked if she would like to start over the other night and she said "no, i don't want to be more than we are now". i don't know what this is supposed to mean.. is it over for good or not? i really want her back.. i know i can't do anything about it but i don't want her to have sex or do anything with other guys.. i mean me and this girl both lost our virginity to each other so it's kinda special.. i don't want her to turn into a slut like her sisters. what should i do? i'm really depressed about this and everything and i need somebody's advice.. please. Link to post Share on other sites
Liv'nLearning Posted November 28, 2003 Share Posted November 28, 2003 Dear Con, I am trying to get this straight? You say you lost your virginity to eachother but now,all she wants is sex from you - not a relationship and that makes you upset but.......you also don't want her to have sex with anyone else and want her back? Ok, firsts things first. I can understand you feel bonded with her because you gave eachother something very special but don't confuse that with true love and/or jealousy. Obviously for her, she was experimenting with you but the depth of your relationship is not how it feels in reality. If your feelings towards one another were mature and included real love and understanding, she wouldn't be backing off right now. I know it hurts but you mustn't ever allow jealousy to cloud your judgement over any woman...EVER! If she really loved you, you would be together. Your reasons for wanting her back shouldn't be based on settling for crumbs nor should it be out of jealousy of losing her to someone else. If any woman truly loves you, wants to understand you, be with you on any level...she will. It's that easy. I suggest dating other girls for a while and holding off on the sex thing until you understand the true meaning of intimacy. I'm sorry but I don't think either of you is truly ready for a real relationship but you both got to experience what intimacy is..what is missing is the bigger picture which is the relationship! Link to post Share on other sites
confusticated Posted November 29, 2003 Share Posted November 29, 2003 yeah you're probably right.. i guess its time to move on. its hard though especially after 10 months together. i'll get over it though.. thanks for replying.. i appreciate it! Link to post Share on other sites
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