Bad boys come first, gay men second, nice guys come last

[loveslife]

So at the club you weren't really being a nice guy. You were just pretending and still playing a game with someone.

 

There are a lot of people on this board who take issue with your attitude and ideas. It's hard to open a thread of yours because there's usually nastiness coming and going.

 

If you are researching a book it would probably be in your best interest to pay attention to what it is that people find difficult with your ideas and attitude. If you want to educate people it's helpful to appeal to them somehow.

 

Just an idea. Good luck with the research.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Back from lunch and the gym.

 

Look, Bob wasn't trying to ask a good question, he was trying to get ammo. I smell his BS.

 

But to answer your question. Yes, internal state matters a lot. It actually has more to do with what you're thinking and how you're saying it (voice tonality, volume, pace) than what you're saying. If you don't give a shxt then it takes out the neediness from the voice.

 

To be honest maybe I was acting a bit too ridiculous in my nice guy role. When ever I approached I made sure I was thinking about the girl I liked and pretended it was her, and just hesitating slightly.

 

It's amazing how well women can pick up hesitation and awkwardness.

[loveslife]

Well that's hopeful. That's like wishing the entire US prison population won't commit crimes again when they get out of jail.

 

Ok so basically you have a problem spotting a jerk. Can I ask how long is it usually between the first date and when you first have sex with a guy?

 

See, that's just unkind. Condescending. Abusive. Do you really think you can help people by putting them down?

[C-i-C-u]

Something guys have to remember, girls want a guy that will give them the physical attention that they need. That means you have to hit the girl for her to really appreciate you and feel that attraction. Also, they want someone who is deep behind doors and quiet mysterious tough outside the doors. Someone who "commands respect". In other words, they really want a guy with no substance, but that is ok because most women wouldn't know the difference like us men do.

[Waitress]

Hkizzle, I'm sorry for calling you a misogynist. After reading more of your work I can see that you pretty much look down on everyone.

 

I think you probably are trying to dissect what is wrong with women in their dating habits to avoid looking at yourself for your R failures honestly.

 

It's kind of sad and I feel sorry for you and hope you can get your act together.

 

Good luck.

[loveslife]

Hkizzle, I'm sorry for calling you a misogynist. After reading more of your work I can see that you pretty much look down on everyone.

 

I think you probably are trying to dissect what is wrong with women in their dating habits to avoid looking at yourself for your R failures honestly.

 

It's kind of sad and I feel sorry for you and hope you can get your act together.

 

Good luck.

 

Agreed. It is sad.

[Eclypse]

That means you have to hit the girl for her to really appreciate you and feel that attraction.

 

I love this line the best

[Pyro]

Confident (truly nice/kind and balanced) guys finish first

 

"Bad Boys" (liars, insecure, scared) and "nice" guys (lack confidence and a pushover) both finish last.

[Leia]

Confident (truly nice/kind and balanced) guys finish first

 

"Bad Boys" (liars, insecure, scared) and "nice" guys (lack confidence and a pushover) both finish last.

 

:love: You don't go around pretending, do you Pyro Myro?

[Pyro]

:love: You don't go around pretending, do you Pyro Myro?

 

Like me or not, what you see/read/hear from me is what you get. I know I can't get every single person on this earth to like me, so why pretend to be something I'm not?

[Hkizzle]

So at the club you weren't really being a nice guy. You were just pretending and still playing a game with someone.

 

Clubs are all about games. Women play games with men all the time. You should see the looks the women gave me when they shot me down. They were trying to make me feel worthless, and that's what they do to nice guys every weekend. So no need to lecture me on the merits or evils of game playing. I've played enough games in my life to know EXACTLY the evils behind it.

 

Besides how am I going to be a nice guy WHEN I AM NOT A NICE GUY?

 

There are a lot of people on this board who take issue with your attitude and ideas. It's hard to open a thread of yours because there's usually nastiness coming and going.

 

If you are researching a book it would probably be in your best interest to pay attention to what it is that people find difficult with your ideas and attitude. If you want to educate people it's helpful to appeal to them somehow.

 

Just an idea. Good luck with the research.

 

Exactly. That's the point! If I was to write a book coming from the position of a jerk. Wouldn't it be a smart thing to test what ideas people find sensitive and which they do not? If I don't push the envelope then I won't know what the limits are.

 

However if I write in a manner that is too safe then there's no impact and controversy to the book.

 

I'm not dumb, no one goes and offends the people they are trying to sell to.

[loveslife]

Confident (truly nice/kind and balanced) guys finish first

 

"Bad Boys" (liars, insecure, scared) and "nice" guys (lack confidence and a pushover) both finish last.

 

I agree.

 

A bad boy is never better off. Whatever women he gets have low self-esteem. And besides he has to live with himself which has to be grueling.

 

The stereotypical "nice guy" gets b*tches.

 

The good man (truly nice and kind and balanced) gets women who value themselves and have more to offer.

 

Whatever the odds or numbers, it only takes one good woman to make a good man happy.

[Leia]

Like me or not, what you see/read/hear from me is what you get. I know I can't get every single person on this earth to like me, so why pretend to be something I'm not?

 

I find that attractive. I don't see why girls or guys need to pretend to get a reaction out of a girl/woman.

 

You're a man, Pyro, not a guy . It's hard to come by men like you!

[loveslife]

I find that attractive. I don't see why girls or guys need to pretend to get a reaction out of a girl/woman.

 

You're a man, Pyro, not a guy . It's hard to come by men like you!

 

Yes!

 

Playing games is a big turn-off.

[Pyro]

I agree.

 

A bad boy is never better off. Whatever women he gets have low self-esteem. And besides he has to live with himself which has to be grueling.

 

The stereotypical "nice guy" gets b*tches.

 

The good man (truly nice and kind and balanced) gets women who value themselves and have more to offer.

 

Whatever the odds or numbers, it only takes one good woman to make a good man happy.

 

Amen.

 

I find that attractive. I don't see why girls or guys need to pretend to get a reaction out of a girl/woman.

 

You're a man, Pyro, not a guy . It's hard to come by men like you!

 

I don't get it either.....boredom perhaps?

 

Thank you. I am one of a kind.

[Left in a Lurch]

Yeah self promotion is part of a player's game.

 

However most of the players I know are either bankers or lawyers. So you can't exactly say they don't have decent careers, lol.

 

Yeah, it was a big generalization, but money can change things. Bankers and lawyers that I have met are generally fairly boring, but they have money.

 

I do pretty well but I am always embarrassed to flaunt it but I see a lot of guys that like to show off their wealth get more attention. I have also seen a fair share of them working to pay for their ex's that lasted a year or two at the most so now they have 1/2 of what they did before.

 

Someone above said it well, I can act like a jerk and get a woman but I tried it and the kind of woman I attracted was the kind that deserved to be with a jerk.

[loveslife]

Someone above said it well, I can act like a jerk and get a woman but I tried it and the kind of woman I attracted was the kind that deserved to be with a jerk.

 

I think that was me. Yes. Why anyone would want to attract a woman by being a jerk is beyond me. You don't exactly get the creme de la creme.

[Pyro]

I think that was me. Yes. Why anyone would want to attract a woman by being a jerk is beyond me. You don't exactly get the creme de la creme.

 

My guess is that they are in it just for the sex.

 

Call me old school, but why do that? Anyone can have sex. Having sex with someone you care about and have feelings for is more fulfilling IMO.

[Hkizzle]

Someone above said it well, I can act like a jerk and get a woman but I tried it and the kind of woman I attracted was the kind that deserved to be with a jerk.

 

Every Jerk will burn in their own personal hell.

 

I recently met a guy that had dinner with one of Jack Nicolson's GFs, and this guy was a big player. He literally worshipped Jack's player lifestyle. But then this woman broke down in tears over dinner because the group broke up Jack's lifestyle.

 

See these jerks and the women that are attracted to them will just be miserable. I know a lot of players that say they want to change but they're not aware their own lifestyle controls them and not the other way around. They couldn't settle down and have a good marriage if they wanted.

 

So karma does exist.

[loveslife]

My guess is that they are in it just for the sex.

 

Call me old school, but why do that? Anyone can have sex. Having sex with someone you care about and have feelings for is more fulfilling IMO.

 

I think it takes having a successful, happy sexual relationship with someone you love to make you see how anything else is meaningless and worthless.

 

Sex to me is part of a commitment in a relationship. Guess I'm old school, too.

 

Jerks are not really in a place that they understand that. IMO

[Leia]

My guess is that they are in it just for the sex.

 

Call me old school, but why do that? Anyone can have sex. Having sex with someone you care about and have feelings for is more fulfilling IMO.

 

I think it takes having a successful, happy sexual relationship with someone you love to make you see how anything else is meaningless and worthless.

 

Sex to me is part of a commitment in a relationship. Guess I'm old school, too.

 

Jerks are not really in a place that they understand that. IMO

 

There's nothing wrong in being old school. As much as I love men, I want someone who shares the same values as I.

[Pyro]

There's nothing wrong in being old school. As much as I love men, I want someone who shares the same values as I.

 

Exactly!

 

I love women very much but finding one that gets me is even better.

[loveslife]

There's nothing wrong in being old school. As much as I love men, I want someone who shares the same values as I.

 

Well put Leia. I enjoy men but don't wanna make one a priority unless we have the same values.

[loveslife]

Exactly!

 

I love women very much but finding one that gets me is even better.

 

I think this is what jerks are afraid of really. I think they prefer to get a woman through a game because they don't wanna risk being rejected for who they are.

 

Anyway, it's nice to see people on this board who reflect goodness. I know the both of you will find good people to be with because of your values.

[Pyro]

I think this is what jerks are afraid of really. I think they prefer to get a woman through a game because they don't wanna risk being rejected for who they are.

 

Anyway, it's nice to see people on this board who reflect goodness. I know the both of you will find good people to be with because of your values.

 

That is a good way to put it. They are afraid to be seen for who they are because they aren't confident in who they really are and insecure of their abilities to keep a woman around.

 

Right back at you.

[loveslife]

That is a good way to put it. They are afraid to be seen for who they are because they aren't confident in who they really are and insecure of their abilities to keep a woman around.

 

Right back at you.

 

Yes. I think the really confident men can be open and truthful. They have more to bring to a relationship and have nothing to hide so there are no lies and games.

 

Haha it's not quite as dramatic but it is real.