indie22 Posted September 26, 2009 Share Posted September 26, 2009 I was going to sit in the Art Building computer lab to get some work done, and I saw this guy that I had a huge crush on from last semester, sitting at the piano and singing. I did not say anything to him because he was talking to this guy from his class...I was sure he needed to concentrate. I tried to ignore his singing and put my headphones. He did see me walk in the room but I figured he would not talk to me because hasn't since this semester started, in Aug. 17th... When he was done practicing, he got up from the piano and walked over to me, and let his figures slide down my arms, and gave me a hug, I was so surprised that I did not know how to react. I hurt my side trying to him a hug, lol. I wanted to know, would he hug me if all this time he has not asked about me liking him, said hi to me when he passes me by around school or elsewhere on campus? Im so confused... Link to post Share on other sites
UrKillinMeSmalls Posted September 26, 2009 Share Posted September 26, 2009 A piano playing, singing guy that carresses your arm and then hugs you out of no where? VERY creepy... He may be gay. If he's not gay, then he may be shy. Or just plain creepy. If he hasn't really ever said anything to you and just greets you with a hug all the sudden, I just view that as strange. As a guy, if I saw you and I liked you I would atleast talk to you. Going from no talk straight to touch would just be awkward and would make most girls feel unsafe. This guy is either A) gay, B) shy and doesn't know what to do, C) thinks that you looking at him was a pass of some kind... or D) is just wierd. Honestly it's probably a mix of all of the above... maybe not gay but feminine-ish. Link to post Share on other sites
imagine Posted September 26, 2009 Share Posted September 26, 2009 Hi again Indie, Tony messaged me about a comment I wrote to you earlier. My message did not come out properly. I write here to encourage people to reveal and release their problems. When I wrote to you I seriously exposed my foot shaped mouth. I lecture at a College and would recommend that the bulk of your energies be channeled into study. Please engage socially but leave crushes aside for now. These can seriously debilitate your academic progress. Link to post Share on other sites
EnigmasMuse Posted September 26, 2009 Share Posted September 26, 2009 For someone who never really spoke to you before, then all of a sudden rubs your arm with his fingers and hugs you out of the blue, is odd to me and pretty forward. It also could be he has liked you for awhile but just wasn't sure how to approach you, but I think the way he went about it wasn't right. He could have walked over and asked to sit down and you all could have started talking. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted September 26, 2009 Share Posted September 26, 2009 OP, I hope you know all conversations aren't necessarily verbal. The brain of a musician is wired up a bit differently, and he likely has picked up on your 'crush'. Question is, what do you do now? What do you want? Link to post Share on other sites
Author indie22 Posted September 26, 2009 Author Share Posted September 26, 2009 OP, I hope you know all conversations aren't necessarily verbal. The brain of a musician is wired up a bit differently, and he likely has picked up on your 'crush'. Question is, what do you do now? What do you want? Yeah, I kind of had the feeling that he knew, Im really intuitive. When I meet a guy who is like that, well I kind of chicken out What do you mean by "op"? Link to post Share on other sites
Author indie22 Posted September 26, 2009 Author Share Posted September 26, 2009 Hi again Indie, Tony messaged me about a comment I wrote to you earlier. My message did not come out properly. I write here to encourage people to reveal and release their problems. When I wrote to you I seriously exposed my foot shaped mouth. I lecture at a College and would recommend that the bulk of your energies be channeled into study. Please engage socially but leave crushes aside for now. These can seriously debilitate your academic progress. No problem, when I write sometimes I write out exactly what I am thinking, you how the mind is not really in order (those choppy thoughts)...and I wanted to get my thoughts out. I did get a little excited while I was writing too. Thank you so much for your advice, my academic coach told me that I should just hold out too...this is another reason why I never really pursued him. It was fine at first because I was getting over, he didnt really say anything to me. Please feel free to add me as a friend! Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted September 26, 2009 Share Posted September 26, 2009 Yeah, I kind of had the feeling that he knew, Im really intuitive. When I meet a guy who is like that, well I kind of chicken out What do you mean by "op"? OP = original post or original poster Now, to me, if you are indeed intuitive, this hug he gave you shouldn't have been a surprise nor startling. How he interpreted your response will likely indicate what happens next. Time reveals all truths. Link to post Share on other sites
Author indie22 Posted September 27, 2009 Author Share Posted September 27, 2009 OP = original post or original poster Now, to me, if you are indeed intuitive, this hug he gave you shouldn't have been a surprise nor startling. How he interpreted your response will likely indicate what happens next. Time reveals all truths. Nah, this one is harder to figure out. I realized that when Im not thinking about him much is when he does something like this...oddly enough, I was that day. When I walked in I saw him blush a little when he saw me, lol, and then he looked down at the piano. Then two days ago I saw him in the library talking to this girl for a while, so thats why its harder to rely on intuition with this guy...he's very approachable, but I was never comfortable enough to walk up to him and say anything. ...I dont know. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted September 27, 2009 Share Posted September 27, 2009 ...I dont know I know exactly what you mean Time will give you the answers you seek... Link to post Share on other sites
Author indie22 Posted October 8, 2009 Author Share Posted October 8, 2009 Hello, Time sped up sooner that I thought, I saw him yesterday morning and he really didnt talk to me, he was awkwardly quiet and than this afternoon, he kept messaging this girl back and forth on facebook. I said, to him, hey lover boy, your computer is messing up, and said he didnt care about that computer...dont know why he said that, he seem interestd in this one *rolls eyes* I told him how I felt about him on fb a while back and he didnt even reply. He gets a lot of emails, but I was mad when he couldnt even write me back. Then he saw me agian this afternoon and he kept play hitting me, standing close and hovering over me whenever I was busy drawing at the computer. Everytime he would finish playing the piano he would find someway to touch me. He even rested his arm on my head, lol, I just let stay there. I just ignored his hits and when he got close pushd him away. I used to do that to him last semester because I didnt know how to get his attn(the play hitting). Same ol' same, I guess guys are nothing like girls...or just the guys I like the most dont care for me at all. I might just give up on dating for a couple more years agian... (I guess time says "hell no, carhill") Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 I might just give up on dating for a couple more years again... I know exactly what you mean Went through a lot of that in my 20's and 30's. The key thing I learned, in retrospect, was not to spend much time on any one person. Enough time to discern mutual interest or not, but not to invest too much of myself. I made that mistake horribly in one instance, and it would haunt me for many years. Older and wiser I guess. Chin up, bust out. Other opportunities await Link to post Share on other sites
Author indie22 Posted November 5, 2009 Author Share Posted November 5, 2009 I know exactly what you mean Went through a lot of that in my 20's and 30's. The key thing I learned, in retrospect, was not to spend much time on any one person. Enough time to discern mutual interest or not, but not to invest too much of myself. I made that mistake horribly in one instance, and it would haunt me for many years. Older and wiser I guess. Chin up, bust out. Other opportunities await Hello Carhill, the problem now is, he is starting to act more & more flirty toward me now & even in front of other girls...PRETTY & UGLY (lol). Its weird, I see him a lot because I hang out in the art bldg of my school...now I cant go there anymore :-(. To tell you the truth, I have been a little depressed because I am usually in the computer lab of the art bldg and most of the musicians hang out in the lab. I do enjoy being in their because I can use the computer as long as I want, I am upset because 1) I know they think I come in there for a "reason" (i.e. a guy) 2) I get extremely nervous when he is in there because I am not sure what to expect from him. I feel guilty when I ignore because I could be wrong my judgment about him (that he has does not want to be monogamous) or when I avoid him because then I am reverting to that girl in highschool who cared what ppl thought about her or was afriad to do something out of the ordinary. On one hand, I am staying in my comfort zone if I avoid him on the other, although my intentions are not at all to see him, It likes I am chasing him because he is always there. What do you think? Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted November 5, 2009 Share Posted November 5, 2009 Hello Carhill, the problem now is, he is starting to act more & more flirty toward me now & even in front of other girls... Why exactly is this a problem? Don't go to the lab if you don't want to. If he's interested in you, he'll approach and flirt, like he's been doing. If you like, be receptive to that and open to his approaches. Leave it at that. Enjoy the attentions of other young men as well. Link to post Share on other sites
Author indie22 Posted November 8, 2009 Author Share Posted November 8, 2009 Well, its not really a problem , its just that he does that with a lot of girls.....so I do not know if he likes me in that way or not. I saw him Thursday, and he came in with everything done, hair, nice clothes, lots of cologne, etc. I saw him chatting up with a girl for a while in the library, but I did not say anything to him at all. I just think its a problem, when I think he's seeing someone else...which is fine, I just dont want to put my feelings in anything thats not going to happen. Im a rookie, so I take flirting as something different from most ppl I guess.......as in more... Link to post Share on other sites
Author indie22 Posted November 8, 2009 Author Share Posted November 8, 2009 Why exactly is this a problem? Don't go to the lab if you don't want to. If he's interested in you, he'll approach and flirt, like he's been doing. If you like, be receptive to that and open to his approaches. Leave it at that. Enjoy the attentions of other young men as well. Plus, I go to the lab on purpose, he has never went out of his way to see me. I go there because I like being in there for one, two, I like him...so he's a bonus. He has never replied to my emails on facebook, but whenever he sees me he stares, HARD, and says hi....or stares long enough until I say hi, lol Link to post Share on other sites
imagine Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 Hi Indie, Leave a note on a board at the college and ask them to contact Indie at Loveshack. Neighbours are much more interesting than us distant cousins. You need to look into his eyes! Link to post Share on other sites
tami-chan Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 awww...<sigh>....to be a kid again... Indie, three words: "SUPPLY and DEMAND".... he is collecting "fans"...he is trying to feed his ego...you are helping him-nothing wrong with that for him. Wrong for you because you barely get anything from it. Stop sending him messages on FB or any where else that you like him....it is enough that he already knows. Disengage.... you are supplying him with too much "attention"-he has devalued you. What he did running his fingers through your arm and hugging you tightly was too forward, if that was me-I would have slapped him...ok...maybe not, but he would've gotten some major staring down...He assumed that you will welcome him violating your personal space. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
Author indie22 Posted November 8, 2009 Author Share Posted November 8, 2009 You need to look into his eyes! What do you mean? Link to post Share on other sites
Author indie22 Posted November 8, 2009 Author Share Posted November 8, 2009 (edited) awww...<sigh>....to be a kid again... Indie, three words: "SUPPLY and DEMAND".... he is collecting "fans"...he is trying to feed his ego...you are helping him-nothing wrong with that for him. Wrong for you because you barely get anything from it. Stop sending him messages on FB or any where else that you like him....it is enough that he already knows. Disengage.... you are supplying him with too much "attention"-he has devalued you. What he did running his fingers through your arm and hugging you tightly was too forward, if that was me-I would have slapped him...ok...maybe not, but he would've gotten some major staring down...He assumed that you will welcome him violating your personal space. Good luck! Thanks Tami, *sigh* I guess Im just going to be a passed around groupie forever...when does it end? I just want to be in love or in a good relationship with someone I really like. Most of the guys that show the most interest I do not like because they talk about themselves all the time. They are willing to spend money on me, take me out etc. but I dont want to be around them. I just want someone that I feel the some way with....I have no experience what so ever at 22 years old. ...2-year college guys are losers...Im leaving in the fall, I cant wait either! Edited November 8, 2009 by indie22 Link to post Share on other sites
imagine Posted November 9, 2009 Share Posted November 9, 2009 Indie, you are young and need some college friends. You wont improve your social skills by correspondence. Find an interest where you will slot into the club. If you find a guy, let the eyes do the talking. Link to post Share on other sites
Author indie22 Posted November 10, 2009 Author Share Posted November 10, 2009 Indie, you are young and need some college friends. You wont improve your social skills by correspondence. Find an interest where you will slot into the club. If you find a guy, let the eyes do the talking.Alright..... Link to post Share on other sites
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