I want to get him back, will this work?

[dlb311]

I have posted before but something has changed. My ex and I were together for two years. We broke up a little over three months ago. He was planning on moving in with me two weeks before he left. I always felt that he was scared and ran because he didn't know what else to do. We had a "Great" relationship. I have had a few and this one was the best! I loved him I would cry in happiness because I was so happy and excited I had found him. I had no doubts and I still don't. I know sometimes couples have to go through rough times to be stronger.

 

Anyway We tried being friends right after the break up and I was up and down thinking he was coming back and he wasn't. He said he wasn't sure what he wanted that he just needed some time. But not to wait for him because that would not be fare to me. But I love him so those words gave me hope. He said his feelings for me haven't changed. He told me he loved me still and needed me in his life. But after two months I couldn't handle it anymore. I didn't see him and he called but I wanted more. So I told him for now I needed my time to get over him because I couldn't just be his friend and I didn't want to pretend to either.

 

So we haven't talked he e-mailed me about a month ago but I never replied. I thought that if I stayed away he would miss me and come back to me. But I held out for over a month I ran into him at the gym and I could tell he missed me. He asked me to call him or write him. But I couldn't I thought if I stayed away he would come back. Two weeks after I ran into him. I was missing him. So I decided to call him and tell him. I called him and told him how I missed him, I missed when I knew I would see him I always got butterflies. How I missed missing him when he would just be in the next room. And that I loved him and I respect he feels he needs his time. But I have learned allot since the break up but not why we are not together. He said Right now he cant. He just doesn't have the effort to put into that serious of a relationship. He said he isn't dating , he isn't looking to date and that isn't what he wants. I said " I'm not asking". He said he knows he just wanted me to know that. I said okay is it because you feel there is something better out there? He said no that he felt that we were great. He said he was sorry and the he wished we could see each other and talk and e-mail. He asked me to e-mail him. I said its hard because I here that I am not in your life anymore. He said he understood. I told him to forget about it and to have a good weekend. He said he wont forget about it and for me to have one too. I said I will. And that was that. I was thinking about it all week.

 

I finally e-mailed him he hasn't read it yet but I feel so good about it. I woke up I finally see what is going on. We were moving to fast for us. He is only 23 and I am 22. we have time. He don't have to rush into moving in together. So I let him know that and that I want to try to hang out and see where it leads us. I don't want to pretend I am not inlove with him. But I would like to step back and try not to be so serious and have him in my life again. I don't necessarily need to know when and where everything in my life will happen. I can take it by chance to have him in my life. Because I was the happiest person when I was with him. Which is not because he was the only thing that made me happy but because I made myself happy because he is a wonderful person. Anyway does anyone have advice?

[Reckless]

Not sure what advice you're looking for there hon.

 

Your boyfriend broke up with you. After two months of trying to be friends he still doesn't want to get back together with you. You stop all contact with him for one month and when you see him, he still doesn't want to get back together with you.

 

You write him and tell him you'll "take a step back". I don't see what choice you had anyway. Advice? Stop contacting him and try and make yourself as happy without him as you were with him because it looks like he doesn't wants to get back together with you.

 

Good Luck

R.