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Even When it's going according to plan


VictoryisMine

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VictoryisMine

donnamaybe, better believe it, lol. Still, that besterd had me going, just a little.

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Towards the end he says, "If you wanted to continue dating other people you should of told me, i could deal with that..." i replied... "WHAT?!" Came out of nowhere, for no reason.

 

Just so this isnt lost on anyone ...please allow me to translate:

 

MM: " Our breaking up and hurting you is in no way to be reflected upon ME. I will not own this, and therefore all of your anger simply shows that it is YOU who are the villain. You want to date other people and you are using me being with my wife as justification for your own bad behavior."

 

Who says I cant speak a 2nd language?

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GreenEyedLady
After the initial 2-3 month affair, falling in love, tells his wife, he moves out, and stays with his sister (long distance or he'd stay with me). Puts his house up for sale, we both tell our friends, family the news.

 

Two months living with his sister, he decides to go home, wife there of course. He says (understandably so) that he cannot afford to pay the mortgage and get another place to stay... and he has over stayed his welcome at his sister's (understandably so).

 

As he is literately moving back into his house (on the phone) I'm reaming his ass out... as he's desperately trying to convince me it's okay. Assuring me i can still call whenever i want. I can mail whenever whatever i want to his house (been mailing to his sister's). And that he is in fact staying in the spare bedroom.

 

I don't care, i don't like it.

 

He's there about a month, divorce is filed.

 

It's been 2 months now that he has been back at his house. In that time he came by once, stayed three days with me.

 

I try to be upbeat about it all, everything is, going according to plan.

 

But i have this raging jealousy that he is and has been for two months now, and who knows for how much longer.... living there with his wife

 

It bothers me, it hurts me. Yes, the audacity of me.

And i remind him of this every now and then.

 

I've been in this mess 7 months, 5 months declaring love. He's done something to piss me off, big time and letting it continue... for two months now.

 

And i can feel it, within me, tired, bored... don't care....anymore... done.

 

And altho everything is/was going according to what he says, i cannot handle him living there with her. I take it as a kick to my stomach.

 

There's a saying i read somewhere, might of even been here on Love Shack....

 

If You Were to Kiss Me and Then Punch Me, Which Do I Believe?

 

Oh hell no...

 

Unacceptable.

 

Don't care about the reasons/excuses.

 

Take a hardline stance: don't answer your phone or his emails. I can't even believe you're wondering about this. This is called gaslighting and he's gaslighting you. And his W is just biding her time.

 

GEL

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Victory,

 

I am so sorry he has hurt you the way he has.

 

I am so sorry he fed you so much crap. :(

 

I am so sorry he has hurt your heart.

 

I hope you can one day realize that people enter our lives for a reason. You just have to figure out what his reason was for entering your life; and in time, thank the Heavens that he exited your life without doing much more damage.

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VictoryisMine

jwi71, didn't see your post. Thanks :) Exactly why i stay single, but thought i'd try... this love... thing. But not just a married man, long distance, but one with a serious illness.

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VictoryisMine

fooled once, thanks. I remember him saying more than once that i gave him the courage to leave his wife.

 

He always stood by that he was just not in love with her. I could only imagine the things he said to her, going by the 'insane' things he has said to me.

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Wow, ViM! I'm glad you had your antennae up, but so sorry he was an @$$ to you.

 

I wish Mino was here to talk/PM with you. Her MM had a similar disorder. He went back home under similar circumstances - a flare up of his disorder. But I think he's actually medically diagnosed.

 

Mino probably would have just the right words for you.

 

I'm so sorry you had to go through this with him. The bible verses from hypocrits is the worst when they were with you and trying to turn it around on you. I love how they forget that God forgives ALL of us, not just them in their santimonious moment.

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OMG ViM!!!

This guy .. WOW. I mean WOW.

I have read a LOT of what the MM have done on these boards ... BUT ... this is unacceptable.

 

What an A$$!!!

 

And he can't date someone like YOU?? OMG - HE was the one in BED with YOU!!! He didn't mind it then, so how did he end up growing morals now?

 

You are MUCH better off without him. NEVER let this douche back in your life.

Sorry for your pain. You stay strong. And yes - YOU do have the Victory over him. Just hink - YOU could have ended up with him!! ugh ....

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