So here I sit...

[logitech]

So here I sit, atop a lookout in my car, overlooking the city I call home. It seems ironic that time is something everyone tries to find more of for so long, but now it is the one thing I have too much of.

 

What is one to do when the things that once brought joy now feel soulless and empty??

 

I sit here and wonder. I sit and wonder too much. Damn time. I'm not even running what if's through my head. Not even memories. For now my mind is blank. Not a clean slate type of blank, but the emptiness that comes with the darkness on a cloudy night where you can't even see the stars.

 

So here I sit. Wondering what is it I want. If I had been alone for the last 7 1/2 years how would I be different?? Damn you time. I'm not angry nor sad, although I know these feelings will come and go. But not right now.

 

What is it that makes someone feel whole?? Something that truly inspires them or makes them feel a sense of worth?? What is this validation that we all seek??

 

So here I sit... Why?!

[tryagaintoday]

Do you already have closure? If not, please get that out of the way as soon as you can.

 

After which, please try to make youself busy. Talk to friends, talk to family. Get a hobby. Hell! Get 2 hobbies or something. Go work out, go jogging.

[logitech]

Heh, there will never be closure for this one. I have to accept that and find a way to move on.

 

As for getting busy, that's the challenge. I am able to keep the weekends pretty busy but of course everyone has to work during the week. I have a job that involves being on the road quite a bit and offers plenty of solo time. In the past I never had an issue with it. I guess I don't really have an issue with it now either.

 

As for hobbies, I have plenty. But like I said, a lot have lost their purpose. As for working out, one can only spend so long a day doing that before they turn into a freak