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Why sometimes does the partner who intitated the break up say, "I can see myself with you in the future but right now I just need time to myself to see what I want." Then less than a week after the break up they are with someone else even though they say they need time to themself.

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Wakeboard,

 

I know that this will not be completely welcome, but my feeling is that she did that to spare you both. It's more or less like the line ... "It's not you, its me..." Better yet, "I love you, but I'm not IN love with you"

 

My suggestion is to move on and attempt to find happiness. She is doing that now.

 

Peace

 

Curt

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Sounds to me like she is using this excuse as a security blanket because she didin't want to say it to my face. Men and women would be better off if they came out and told the truth and wouldn't sugar coat everything they think will hurt the other person to make it seem not so bad. It hurts more to be led on then to have the truth told.

 

I am moving on but still had questions to ask so I know what to look for if it happens in another relationship.

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I think this statement could have been spoken with a true heart. Sometimes, people need a break from a serious relationship to see if this is really everything they need. It is so unfair to the person left behind. But we all know life can be very unfair at times. Your significant other may be dating this new person as a rebound, as some kind of quick fix to temporarily gloss over the fact they are no longer with you. It is pathetic, it is heartless, it is thoughtless. But I wouldn't say for certain that this other person has lost their feelings for you. Which is not to say you haven't lost your feelings for them!

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Anyway to see if those feelings still exsist without making it seem like I want her back. I don't think I would get back with her, but you know that the heart and mind are to completley different things.

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