seibert253 Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 You must be new. Just stick around and read others' stories. You will see that a betrayed husband said "my wife is a devoted church going Christian and she would never ever cheat" and three weeks later, he said "my wife is having an affair with this guy from work and they slept together for the past three months right before work or right after work and somtime they do it during lunch too." Wow Blue, that really hit home. Damn Link to post Share on other sites
Author nodivorce Posted October 8, 2009 Author Share Posted October 8, 2009 Don't fool yourself. Some marriages show no changes is sexual activity when an A is going on. I wasn't getting any before, nor during the A. A friend of mine whose W was fu#king everything that walked, was still getting it 3 or 4 times a week. We are not living together, seperated. Last week was the first time we had sex in over 2 mths, she moved out 1 mth, 2 weeks ago. Before she moved out, she wouldnt even let me see her naked, using the robe, closing doors. I guess the bright side is I got some pretty good sex out of it... Link to post Share on other sites
bluegreen12 Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 We are not living together, seperated. Last week was the first time we had sex in over 2 mths, she moved out 1 mth, 2 weeks ago. Before she moved out, she wouldnt even let me see her naked, using the robe, closing doors. I guess the bright side is I got some pretty good sex out of it... And maybe an STD or two. Link to post Share on other sites
Steadfast Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 Nodivorce, please listen and know; she is having an affair, it is physical and she is lying and keeping secrets. Most of all, to and from herself. It amazes me that so many here ring up the 'NC' suggestion when that is virtually impossible when you have kids. In fact, *trying* NC when you *have* to see each other makes things worse. You can't do it. What you can do is let her go. Just do it. I know you love her and I know you want to make it work but she doesn't. Accept it. It is HARD. I know! So many of us know!! I won't tell you my story but...well, I'm divorced now. I had to move on. My ex still tries to play me. Women can play games and not say a word. Be nice. No dates. Be nice. Don't tell her you love her. SHOW her love. Let her go and really mean it. If she loves you she'll come back. If not? You already know the answer to that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nodivorce Posted October 8, 2009 Author Share Posted October 8, 2009 Be nice. No dates. Be nice. Don't tell her you love her. SHOW her love. Let her go and really mean it. If she loves you she'll come back. . Should I do things for her if she needs help with something or just push her off? What do you mean by SHOW her love? Link to post Share on other sites
seibert253 Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 Should I do things for her if she needs help with something or just push her off? What do you mean by SHOW her love? No. She needs to experience life on her own. That's what she wants, that's what she gets. If you do "favors" or "things" for her, she will continue to play you. Link to post Share on other sites
phineas Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 I just find it hard to believe she would have sex with me while she is having an affair. Im not being naive, anything is possible, but if she did this than I want to know who took her brain. Dude, after she moved out we would get freaky at least 3 or 4 times week. Nooner's, sometimes if the kids were still sleeping i'd stop off at her apartment on the way to work. She'd stop off at night after the kids were in bed then leave. And it was kinky dirty sex in many different places & positions. After a few months of this I started to view her as my personal cum dumpster & lost respect for her every time she told me "i'm not your booty call" after she showed up for 30 mins of sex then left. LOL! Made it very easy to decide divorce when I found out she was screing OM just as much. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nodivorce Posted October 8, 2009 Author Share Posted October 8, 2009 No. She needs to experience life on her own. That's what she wants, that's what she gets. If you do "favors" or "things" for her, she will continue to play you. Yes, I understand that and agree. My situation though is we are still using the same bank accounts, nothing has bee split up yet. The car she is driving needs new belts and I always fix the cars. I could just tell her to bring it to a mechanic, but then it would be part of my money paying for it. If I start splitting up things right now, things could get messy. We are both in school right now, so neither one of us has much time to do anything. Link to post Share on other sites
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