How long does it take?

[Buck]

Ok, here is my situation. I was dating this girl for over 2 years. It was a good relationship. Well, about 3 months ago, we had an arguement and i pissed her off. Well she told me to leave her alone. I know it was my fault. I tried saying im sorry right after but she didn't want to speak to me. I haven't talked to her since then (a week after the breakup) Well i was really hurt because of what i did and i realize how much i liked her. A few weeks ago i thought i was healed enough to move on. So I found myself a new GF. Everything is going good, but lately I have done nothing but think about my ex and I have come to realize that i still have feelings for her. Im not sure if i can love any other females like i have my ex. I have tried and tried to get her out of my head but im unsuccessful. I even accidently called my new GF, my old girlfriends name the other day. I have even thought about calling my ex GF just to say hi and to see how i feel but i don't have the nerve to because i don't know what to say if i would. Im really unsure of what to do. Should i try calling my ex? or will this feeling eventually go away in time. The truth is, i would love to get back together with my ex but i dunno what she thinks or what she is doing. I like my new girlfriend and i would like to stay with her but my heart is still with my ex. Any opinion or advise on what to do would be greatly appriciated.

 

thank you,

 

Buck

[Tony T]

You better forget about your EX and start devoting your energies to your present lady friend.

 

My experience has been that if somebody writes you completely off because of one mistake, they really want you out of their life. Unless there were a lot of other issues you didn't discuss, the fact that your EX couldn't get over it and carry on the relationship tells me she would be worthless to you as a friend, lover or whatever.

 

When a woman tells you to leave them alone, she MEANS IT!!! Perhaps you need to learn to argue more constructively. That may be the lesson you needed to learn from the relationship. But ladies usually very truly mean it when they want you to disappear. Forget her!!!

 

Why in heaven's name would you continue to think about someone so unforgiving to write you off that quickly and so uncaring that she hasn't even given you a call to see how you are doing??? She is the one who told you to get lost so it is her place to call.

 

Forget about this worthless chick and give your time and attention to someone who will treat you decently and forgive you for an occasional slip up.

 

Also, there is really no point in any argument. Each party should state their opinion and then you should negotiate a compromise...or just keep your own opinions and move on to other events.

 

HINT: There is absolutely no payoff whatsoever, no tax deduction, no trip to Europe, no special bonus, no new car, etc. for being right in an argument with a girlfriend. Talk things over, listen to her, let her know how you feel in a kind, positive way...and move on. Don't be a wimp...that is, stand up for yourself, but don't raise your voice, don't insult her, try to see her point, and try to reach some middle ground. If you can't do that, weigh which is more important; being with this person and continuing to love them or parting and living without them.

 

Life is simply too short to try to convince people you are right. WHO CARES??????

[Buck]

ok, thanks for the info. Its A little too late, i tried calling her a few minutes ago but nobody answered the phone. There is usually nobody home at her house during the day. She's got caller ID so i just figured if she wants to talk to me then she will call me back. I just hope that i can rid myself of this emotional scar from my past. I want to forget about this chick and move on with my new GF but

 

i still think about her alot and it EXTREMELY HARD. I probably shouldn't have got into this new relationship until i was 100% over the past. Can anyone answer me something, Do any of you beleive in destiny? Is it possible for a past relationship to rejuvinate in a later time? What if two people seems right for each other but maybe they just met at the wrong time?

 

ps. my new GF is studying to be a doctor.... (maybe i should stick with her!! LOL)

 

Buck

You better forget about your EX and start devoting your energies to your present lady friend.

 

My experience has been that if somebody writes you completely off because of one mistake, they really want you out of their life. Unless there were a lot of other issues you didn't discuss, the fact that your EX couldn't get over it and carry on the relationship tells me she would be worthless to you as a friend, lover or whatever.

 

When a woman tells you to leave them alone, she MEANS IT!!! Perhaps you need to learn to argue more constructively. That may be the lesson you needed to learn from the relationship. But ladies usually very truly mean it when they want you to disappear. Forget her!!! Why in heaven's name would you continue to think about someone so unforgiving to write you off that quickly and so uncaring that she hasn't even given you a call to see how you are doing??? She is the one who told you to get lost so it is her place to call. Forget about this worthless chick and give your time and attention to someone who will treat you decently and forgive you for an occasional slip up. Also, there is really no point in any argument. Each party should state their opinion and then you should negotiate a compromise...or just keep your own opinions and move on to other events.

 

HINT: There is absolutely no payoff whatsoever, no tax deduction, no trip to Europe, no special bonus, no new car, etc. for being right in an argument with a girlfriend. Talk things over, listen to her, let her know how you feel in a kind, positive way...and move on. Don't be a wimp...that is, stand up for yourself, but don't raise your voice, don't insult her, try to see her point, and try to reach some middle ground. If you can't do that, weigh which is more important; being with this person and continuing to love them or parting and living without them. Life is simply too short to try to convince people you are right. WHO CARES??????

[Tony T]

Destiny was a great race horse about 15 years ago and I believed in her.

 

Events that happen in our lives, people we meet, etc. are mostly by chance. I guess you can call that destiny. I don't think we are preordained to meet a certain person or do a certain thing.

 

There are a lot of people out there who would make great movie stars, but instead are department store cashiers. They are where they are because they didn't have the ambition required to be elsewhere.

 

There are some practicing lawyers who probably would have made better plumbers.

 

There are many people who are married to less than optimal partners because they were too shy or afraid to walk up to a person at the mall or in the grocery store who would have probably been much better for them.

 

There are more people who are unhappy because they were too scared or lazy to leave a bad relationship as set out to find a good one.

 

The big question Forrest Gump asked his dying mother in the movie was about his destiny, His mom, played by Sally Fields, replied simply that we all make our own destiny.

 

So destiny can probably be better defined by where we ended up rather than how we got there. We are responsible for achieving our destiny. So if your destiny is to meet a wonderful woman and marry her, get out there and look!!!

[magicklady]

99% of the time YOU CAN'T GO BACK!!!! It just never works out. Tony was right when he asked you why you would want to be with someone who dismissed you that easily.... I just went through this, started talking to my ex we are still both confused, but I have decided that it is time to let it all go and move on. He is with someone else now and although I think some of those scars stay with you forever you do move on and heal. You just have to be willing to do that. I know that you have probably spent some wonderful times with your ex.. but that is the past and better left there. I believe in destiny, but I believe that when relationships go wrong because of so called "timing" that is how it was supposed to be anyway. Good luck with your situation, but I would say to stick with your GF now, where you don't have to feel like you are kissing butt because of something you did wrong for the rest of your life....