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Should I try again


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So in my last thread I decided to fly home for Thanksgiving to see my family and get away from the stress of work. My parents weren't thrilled b/c they thought I was going to see the ex of five months and boyfriend of 3 years. I really wasn't...

 

He called the night before i left to see if we were going to get together (I had only talked to him a total of five minutes since I'd been in town). I said I didn't have anything to say but if he did I'd listen. He told me to meet him at a local restaurant. We talked about general stuff first and then we finally started talking about our breakup. He apologized (again) and told me that he still misses me and has had a hard few months too (he moved back to our hometown after we broke up which is across the country). He said he wanted my friendship and it meant the world to him. I asked him if he had alterior motives behind our friendship and he said (after forcing it out of him) that he wants to start over. Obviously there are a lot of issues that needed to be discussed before I even consider it. I do still love him and would want to be with him, but I don't know if he deserves another chance. It would require me moving back north. Anyway, we left it at that. We just said we'd work on our friendship. I'm still going to see other people if the opportunity comes up (it has, but nothing to mention). FYI- we only hugged that night.

 

Besides deciding if I should be with him is only one problem. Another problem, but I know it shouldn't be is that if I go back with this guy my family will be PISSED! They are very disapproving and told me they would not support it. That hurts because I'm very close to my family and their support means so much to me. I know it's my own life, but this would definitely put a strain on our relationship if I went back with him.

 

I'm kinda stumped on this. This is all a possibility not a definite thing, I still have to decide if being with him is what i want. He is my first love.

 

Any thoughts anyone?

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My family and a lot of my friends think I'm too good for him. I guess it's because he hasn't finished college and he has a lot of baggage with his family and he's also in a lot of debt. He's also really quiet around my family b/c he's intimidated by them. They are REALLY protective of me. They think that he doesn't try to get to know them and that he doesn't like them.

 

He's always been really good to me (excluding the actual breakup). I know he has a lot of baggage. He also is more open around me than he my family.

That's the jist of it though...

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Hi... well, I guess I understand why your family does not love the guy. Here's my advice:

 

If he is your first love, then you should see what else the world has to offer. I would be honest with him and try to remain friendly with him. If he still wants to make it work now, chances are that he will be there for you in the future (unless he falls in love with someone else... in which case you should be happy for him). I generally don't think it's a good idea to get back together with someone after you've broken up unless there has been a lot of tome in between... I'm talking years, not months. This time allows you to reflect on what was good and bad about the relationship and, more improtantly, allows you to understand what you truly want.

 

I hope this advice helps a little bit.

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