Horribly Confused...need advice/ideas

[lovegroove]

My best friend's brother got out of the military a little over a month ago and all I can say is WOW! He went from being a scrawny annoying little brother to a mature, very good-looking man.

 

I've been attracted to him since he stopped by to visit the first time after he got back. He's been over at least 3 times a week since then (my best friend and I live together). I thought the feeling was mutual because I would catch him watching me every so often, and he acted much friendlier towards me than he had before he left (before, we barely said 3 words to each other, now we'll chat about what's going on in his life, or movies, books, my best friend). Last week I was making an apple pie and couldn't get the pie filling can open so he came in to help (we only have a manual can opener) and ended up cutting the side of his hand. I found a napkin and was holding it over his cut, trying to apply pressure, and he held my hand for a few seconds before mumbling "I've got it." Since then he's found a way to make some small physical contact each time we meet (brushing my fingers with his when I hand him something, things like that), although the past couple of days he hasn't.

 

Last night he invited my best friend to run to the store with him but he (my best friend is a man, btw) didn't really feel like going out so I blurted out "Take me with so I can get out of the house then" to which he (the brother) said "Okay!" So we went and...

...nothing happened. We talked about the usual type of stuff that we talked about before while we drove over and walked around. He kept asking if there was anything else I wanted to do but since he had to be up very early today I said no.

 

Now I'm confused. Did I read too much into what went on before? I felt so strongly that he was attracted to me as well - kind of a gut feeling, I guess you could say. Why wouldn't he try anything while we were out?

 

Any ideas are welcome

[Tony T]

First of all, I hope you get an electric can opener for Christmas. The are so great and most have a magnet that holds the top there after you pull the opened can away. Just be sure to grab the edges of the lid very carefully when throwing it away because the edges are sometimes very sharp.

 

Your best friend's guy may be very reserved for the sole reason that you are his brother's best friend and he may not yet quite understand that. Maybe, without you knowing it, your best friend has expressed an interest in you and hasn't made a move. Yeah, you're saying that's impossible...but NO, it's not. It happens an awful lot and guys come here to ask how they can approach such a delicate subject and how they can discretely let their lady platonic friend of many years know there are more feelings involved.

 

The guy you like may just feel uneasy about pursuing his brother's best friend and roommmate. It's a privacy thing. There may also be a possibility that while you are now attracted to him, he may still see you as a girl he grew up with or even as somewhat of a sister. Yes, there could be an attraction but it could be mixed with the sister thing. In the absense of being able to meet and make love with Salma Hayek, I wouldn't mind having her for a sister and going shopping with her. It would beat never meeting her at all.

 

Let some time pass, then express your feelings to this guy. Nothing beats getting things out into the open and ironed out. Could be he really likes you and there's nothing stopping him except his own shyness. There aren't many opportunities to date ladies when in the military, especially if you're stationed in certain areas, so he may need some transition time to get up his confidence. You decide when you want to have this talk.

 

Also keep the other things in mind that I have mentioned. Lots of things could be happening around you that could be going right over your head.

[lovegroove]

Originally posted by Tony

First of all, I hope you get an electric can opener for Christmas. The are so great and most have a magnet that holds the top there after you pull the opened can away. Just be sure to grab the edges of the lid very carefully when throwing it away because the edges are sometimes very sharp.

I actually did put an electric can opener on my Christmas list this year We used to have one but it never actually opened the cans so we went back to the old-fashioned way.

 

Your best friend's guy may be very reserved for the sole reason that you are his brother's best friend and he may not yet quite understand that. Maybe, without you knowing it, your best friend has expressed an interest in you and hasn't made a move. Yeah, you're saying that's impossible...but NO, it's not. It happens an awful lot and guys come here to ask how they can approach such a delicate subject and how they can discretely let their lady platonic friend of many years know there are more feelings involved.

 

The guy you like may just feel uneasy about pursuing his brother's best friend and roommmate. It's a privacy thing. There may also be a possibility that while you are now attracted to him, he may still see you as a girl he grew up with or even as somewhat of a sister. Yes, there could be an attraction but it could be mixed with the sister thing.

 

Let some time pass, then express your feelings to this guy. Nothing beats getting things out into the open and ironed out. Could be he really likes you and there's nothing stopping him except his own shyness. There aren't many opportunities to date ladies when in the military, especially if you're stationed in certain areas, so he may need some transition time to get up his confidence. You decide when you want to have this talk.

 

Also keep the other things in mind that I have mentioned. Lots of things could be happening around you that could be going right over your head.

 

Thanks for the insight, Tony I wil keep these things in mind. Sometimes it is hard for me to remember that things don't always happen right away (look at the transformation my friend's brother went through).