cecilia0524 Posted October 28, 2009 Share Posted October 28, 2009 I wrote about this previously, and got complain that my story was too long. I really want feedback, so I will try again this time. So there is this guy at work that I think he is interested, but not fully sure. He would come to my desk to talk for a long time until my manager kicks him away or being interrupted by others. He usually get off work couple hrs before me, but last time when I worked (I only work with him once a week), he stayed until I leave. We walked to the subway together. Before we say good bye to each other, he took his hand out for a handshake as he said "Have a nice weekend!". What does the handshake mean and how else do I know if he is interested? Please help me. Link to post Share on other sites
Odyssey Posted October 28, 2009 Share Posted October 28, 2009 i can't really tell from your post... How long have you known him? What is he like? Is he shy/flirty? What is he like with other people? Do you feel he goes out of his way to see you? What does he talk about? Link to post Share on other sites
Author cecilia0524 Posted October 29, 2009 Author Share Posted October 29, 2009 i can't really tell from your post... How long have you known him? What is he like? Is he shy/flirty? What is he like with other people? Do you feel he goes out of his way to see you? What does he talk about? I have seen him hanging out with a lot of other male coworkers. He is a guy that can talk about almost anything to a guy friend type of guy, but not too much with girls. My other friends who work there, who is a girl, said that he never introduce himself to her, and never even talk to her. I rarely see him with girls. He seems shy in a way that he like to flirt with me with his eyes (he looks at me so deeply that his eyes never get off from mine when we talk) We talk about anything from family background to personal things. I started working at this place since this September, so not that long. I think, but I am not very sure, that one time he was going to ask me out to a bar or sth, but he was mumbling, so I couldn't hear clearly, when I asked him to repeat, he said "nvm". Ummm... there's this one time, me and my friend who brought in another "customer" along to consult him to fix a hard drive. He looked at all of us, he only had a closer relationship with me, so he said "she better be your good friend!" my other friend was trying to talk to him, but he doesn't have that same reaction when he talks to me. Is that enough information? Please ask me more to make things clear. Link to post Share on other sites
Odyssey Posted October 29, 2009 Share Posted October 29, 2009 Cecilia, he seems interested in you. As to why he hasn't asked you out yet, I can't answer that - sorry! Maybe he's just on a different clock than you are or maybe he's not assertive enough... I don't know. From what you've said, he's not doing much chasing, but then again, maybe you're not really giving him anything to chase. Sometimes men need a little reassurance. You can give him the reassurance without taking away his manly duty to do the asking out by turning up the heat on your flirting with him. Don't throw yourself at him, but do send him signals that are non-verbal. For instance, you can do a lot with your eyes that show him you're interested without winking. Hold his gaze. Don't look away. If you catch him looking at you when he thinks you're not, give him a winning smile with a little bit of an "I know what you're thinking" sparkle in it. Men love it when you laugh at their jokes, and listen to their tales of "slaying the dragons" at the end of the day. Practice doing this. Even if it's a mercy giggle, be generous. Compliments are wonderful free gifts. Tell him you think he looks really great today. His hair is so much sexier than it used to be - that kind of thing. You get the idea. After doing all that, he'll get the message from you that you're interested, without you seeming easy. If you've given him something to chase, and he's not chasing, then it's time to move on and understand that although you like him, he's just not moving at your speed, or he's not interested in you, as more than a friend. Link to post Share on other sites
Author cecilia0524 Posted October 30, 2009 Author Share Posted October 30, 2009 Cecilia, he seems interested in you. As to why he hasn't asked you out yet, I can't answer that - sorry! Maybe he's just on a different clock than you are or maybe he's not assertive enough... I don't know. From what you've said, he's not doing much chasing, but then again, maybe you're not really giving him anything to chase. Sometimes men need a little reassurance. You can give him the reassurance without taking away his manly duty to do the asking out by turning up the heat on your flirting with him. Don't throw yourself at him, but do send him signals that are non-verbal. For instance, you can do a lot with your eyes that show him you're interested without winking. Hold his gaze. Don't look away. If you catch him looking at you when he thinks you're not, give him a winning smile with a little bit of an "I know what you're thinking" sparkle in it. Men love it when you laugh at their jokes, and listen to their tales of "slaying the dragons" at the end of the day. Practice doing this. Even if it's a mercy giggle, be generous. Compliments are wonderful free gifts. Tell him you think he looks really great today. His hair is so much sexier than it used to be - that kind of thing. You get the idea. After doing all that, he'll get the message from you that you're interested, without you seeming easy. If you've given him something to chase, and he's not chasing, then it's time to move on and understand that although you like him, he's just not moving at your speed, or he's not interested in you, as more than a friend. Odessy, thank you so much for the feedback! It definitely gave me an idea on how I should approach him. The only concern for me is that there are so little time that I get to see him during my shift. And for today, I heard he left early, before I even start my shift! I was a little disappointed as I would like to make a flirt with him. haha. Silly me, but I wasn't happy for a while because he wasn't there. Btw, he shaved his head off, so I can't really compliment about his hair, plus that he always wear the similar types of tshirts and jeans, don't know how to compliment on his outfits without over exaggerating, especially I am a fashion design major student. I came to the building to just to see if I can catch him doing nth, but he was talking to one of my manager on duty when I passed by the office cubicles. I waved to him and smiled. That's all I could do because I don't want to see too aggressive in any way. My question is, are you giving a feedback in a men's perspective? Cuz that's what I am looking for when posting this thread. Thank you so much! Link to post Share on other sites
Odyssey Posted October 30, 2009 Share Posted October 30, 2009 The only concern for me is that there are so little time that I get to see him during my shift. There will be opportunities, you just have be a little patient. My question is, are you giving a feedback in a men's perspective? Cuz that's what I am looking for when posting this thread. Thank you so much! Definitely from a male point of view. You thought i was a girl?!? What gave you that idea? Link to post Share on other sites
Author cecilia0524 Posted November 4, 2009 Author Share Posted November 4, 2009 There will be opportunities, you just have be a little patient. Definitely from a male point of view. You thought i was a girl?!? What gave you that idea? Haha... I don't know. Some times girls have a different perspective of seeing things. I just want to make sure I am getting a guy's perspective this time. Any suggestion on how to attract more people to comment on my post? I need more feedback, but I think for my case it's very general, all I should do is just give more hints. Link to post Share on other sites
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