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said he wants to buy me dinner - date or not?


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Posted

This guy and I met through a mutual friend. Last time we saw each other was in a group situation. Since then we've both become single.

 

We've been emailing lately. The emails have evolved from impersonal to personal. We talk about our feelings on relationships and life.

 

Turns out I'll be in his area for business. He said he wants to buy me dinner.

 

Is this a date?

 

Thanks. :)

Posted

Yes, it's a date. Have fun!

  • Author
Posted

Thanks for the response hopesndreams. :) I promised myself that next time I had a date I'd just relax and enjoy. Found myself starting to get nervous so was almost hoping this wasn't a date. But I'm excited, too, so I'll try and focus on that. Or maybe just try and relax. :confused:

Posted

Be yourself. No expectations. Something comes out of it, great! If not, oh well. :)

Posted

Definitely date

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Posted
Be yourself. No expectations. Something comes out of it, great! If not, oh well. :)

 

That's what the sensible part of me says as well. :)

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Posted
Definitely date

 

What do you think makes it definitely a date? Thanks.

Posted
What do you think makes it definitely a date? Thanks.

 

If I ask a girl out to dinner, I'm asking her on a date.

  • Author
Posted
If I ask a girl out to dinner, I'm asking her on a date.

 

How would it differ if you're asking a friend to meet for dinner?

Posted
How would it differ if you're asking a friend to meet for dinner?

 

Me asking a girl on a date: I'd like to buy you dinner

 

Me meeting a friend for dinner: You wanna get some food?

  • Author
Posted
Me asking a girl on a date: I'd like to buy you dinner

 

Me meeting a friend for dinner: You wanna get some food?

 

Got it. Yeah, that's what kind of clued me in, when he said he wanted to buy me dinner instead of just suggesting we meet up.

 

Thanks.

Posted

It's a date, for the reason amirpc gave. Have fun!

Posted
Thanks.

 

Glad to help, have fun :)

Posted

OK, so when is this date? Date reports are a required followup to date questions, in case you're not aware ;)

  • Author
Posted
OK, so when is this date? Date reports are a required followup to date questions, in case you're not aware ;)

 

OK. I'll check back after Tuesday. :)

  • Author
Posted
OK, so when is this date? Date reports are a required followup to date questions, in case you're not aware ;)

 

Okay, here's the required followup...

 

Had a nice time. I really like him, conversation was nonstop, interesting, fun. He's a really good person.

 

However, he has a boatload of baggage. Some really messy stuff. It might be a timing issue because once he has some time to deal with this stuff I think he'd be great to be involved with.

 

I think I want to keep it as a friend thing.

 

Thanks for the advice before. :)

Posted

Well its good you had a good time and who knows maybe the baggage isnt as bad as you thought and you guys can move past it

Posted

OP, one thing to be careful of is projecting your experiences onto others. If you noticed behaviors that match up with the baggage and make that baggage unhealthy, fair enough.

 

For example, I'm going through a divorce right now. Does that statement confer certain baggage? If so, what? How am I handling it? How do you know this? Be careful with the last part. IMO, if you liked the guy and he showed you a good time, get a handle on his perspective before summarily dismissing him. If the roles were reversed, would you not want the same consideration?

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