doomage Posted November 11, 2009 Share Posted November 11, 2009 read this to get up to speed http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t208156/ Well i'm still struggling to forget about the girl that was my friend, i've still been texting her in vain because i have some hope she'll respond, but no dice. Sometimes i'm ok and i'm not thinkin about her but sometimes i can't stop and start looking for her on facebook and stuff. she set her privacy settings to not be able to get searched on there. but i've seen her picture. and now when i go to school i don't see her at all like i used to so i wonder if she's still going, and i feel like maybe shes gonna move back to where she came from in december instead of visiting like she said awhile back, which kind of makes me sad, even though i shouldnt care because we aren't friends anymore. i even drove around to see if maybe i would see her going to work and drove by her job so maybe i can talk to her but then i realized what i was doing and said "forget this i'm not a damn stalker" and i went home. give me some advice........ Link to post Share on other sites
eeyore1981 Posted November 11, 2009 Share Posted November 11, 2009 Dude, if you have other friends, go do something with them. If you don't, make some and go do something with them. You are obsessing in a major way. Occupy yourself with other things, get a hobby, read a book. You met a girl, you liked her, she didn't like you back. It happens. There are other girls out there. If you keep on trying to contact this girl, you are a damn stalker, and you are going to end up having a RO put on you and/or go to jail. You don't have the right to harass, and yes, this is harassment, someone just because you have feelings for them, so cut it out. Link to post Share on other sites
TheLoneSock Posted November 11, 2009 Share Posted November 11, 2009 Alright so first of all I'm guessing you're all about this girl because you never closed the deal, right? Ok, so what makes her so special? She says you were using her... using her for what? Nothing happened. SHE was using YOU... you gave her rides to work, did things for her, treated her good. Why are you still giving this girl your attention? Drop her. She has told you to leave her alone, that's a pretty clear signal. You never, ever call her again. You don't text her, nothing. You forget all about her. You have been giving her what she wants this whole time for free: attention. Every time you call her or text her, her ego gets a little bigger, she feels a little more powerful. Forget the broad, stop feeding her ego, and stop letting her use you. There are WAY, WAY too many other attractive girls out there for you to waste one more breath on her. And in the future, make sure stay away from girls like this. They have nothing to offer you. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted November 11, 2009 Share Posted November 11, 2009 give me some advice........ dude, there are lots of other broads out there Link to post Share on other sites
Author doomage Posted November 11, 2009 Author Share Posted November 11, 2009 Alright so first of all I'm guessing you're all about this girl because you never closed the deal, right? Ok, so what makes her so special? She says you were using her... using her for what? Nothing happened. I never used her because nothing did happen, and i guess i let her use me, but i think im really hung up on her beauty shes the prettiest girl i think i've seen since i moved here to vegas two years ago from los angeles and i got caught by her looks and body. plus shes cuban and from the east coast (new jersey) so she was different to the girls around here, i just dont feel attraction to chicks around here like her, but i mean she was a cool chick but in the end my lack of self respect did our friendship in, but i always wanted more with her and i think i was just settling for being her friend since i couldnt be nothing else. i keep thinking of the memories of me and her and the good times we had but also i think the real reason why im still hung up on her is because im bored, i was never bored with her because we always hung out and she was pretty much my only solid friend here now i have no friends really i go to work then come home and go on the computer...pretty sad. but this experience taught me some things and i know i gotta go out there and get better with women and make my life more fullfilling besides women. Link to post Share on other sites
Author doomage Posted November 11, 2009 Author Share Posted November 11, 2009 ya i tell myself that all the time but sometimes i have my moments of just tunnel vision and compare every chick to her like if my mom says she saw some cute cuban girls at a restaurant ill be like "were they hotter than her? bigger ass than her?" and stuff like that just gotta get out there and start approaching girls and being proactive i believe. thanks for the advice Link to post Share on other sites
TheLoneSock Posted November 11, 2009 Share Posted November 11, 2009 You need to watch the movie "I Love You, Man". It's pretty funny and your situation made me think of it haha. Anyway, there's nothing wrong with having more girl friends than guy friends, as long as you are having sex with a couple of them- otherwise that is a little wierd. Use your hobbies and talents to get out and meet new people. The more you are out of the house, the more you will experience, and the higher chance you will have of making more guy friends and meeting girls that are interested in you sexually. The only obstacle in your way is your own shyness. As far as still thinking about this girl sexually, there is ALWAYS better out there. So what if you didn't **** this girl, there are hotter girls out there that you will eventually get with. Don't sweat it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author doomage Posted November 11, 2009 Author Share Posted November 11, 2009 ya i mean right from the get go this girl had no sexual interest in me at all, she even told me like a month later when we had a deep talk. i was just kidding my self by being her friend and hoping things would change one day. even though she did try to get physical with me she just couldnt do it she had no attraction for me.it just hurts every time i go to school the days that she's supposed to be at school i feel like accidentally running into her just to see her but im curious if she is still attending class or not, because i havent seen her lately only sometimes i see her aunts car outside her job when she works, becaus she borrows her car since were not friends anymore. i used to alwyas give her rides and pick her up. but i have to remember that if i got her to atleast like being around me and shes a hot girl i can do it again with any other girl in the world. gotta stop kicking my own ass about things too hard. thanks Link to post Share on other sites
WTRanger Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 read this to get up to speed http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t208156/ Well i'm still struggling to forget about the girl that was my friend, i've still been texting her in vain because i have some hope she'll respond, but no dice. Sometimes i'm ok and i'm not thinkin about her but sometimes i can't stop and start looking for her on facebook and stuff. she set her privacy settings to not be able to get searched on there. but i've seen her picture. and now when i go to school i don't see her at all like i used to so i wonder if she's still going, and i feel like maybe shes gonna move back to where she came from in december instead of visiting like she said awhile back, which kind of makes me sad, even though i shouldnt care because we aren't friends anymore. i even drove around to see if maybe i would see her going to work and drove by her job so maybe i can talk to her but then i realized what i was doing and said "forget this i'm not a damn stalker" and i went home. give me some advice........ DUDE! LET THIS GO! God, I wish I could make this font 1,000 times larger and punch it into your thick-ass skull. All of the advice you received in your past two threads. Nothing stuck? Are you seriously that dense? This girl is about one step away from slapping a restraining order on your scary stalker-ass. Its over. She has zero, ZERO ZERO ZERO ZERO ZERO ZERO ZERO ZERO ZERO ZERO ZERO ZERO interest in knowing you even exist. Stop all of this crazy, creepy, pussy, puppy dog stalking. You are nothing more than a creep to her at this point. You ARE a stalker at this point. You ARE that creepy loser she laughs to all of her friends about. She didn't do this to you. YOU DID. Its beyond over at this point. You just refuse to accept it because your head is so far up your own bunghole that you can see out your nose. Link to post Share on other sites
Author doomage Posted November 14, 2009 Author Share Posted November 14, 2009 Well WRT Ranger you were right this afternoon after i sent a text saying "whats up how you doing" she replied like two hours later saying "you text me one more time im calling the cops and tell them that your harrassing me" i didnt reply but just erased her number and realizing how dumb i was.... thanks for the advice, my bad for being so hardheaded damn.. Link to post Share on other sites
WTRanger Posted November 15, 2009 Share Posted November 15, 2009 What I find funny, is several people told you this would happen. Yet, you STILL decided to continue to text her. You come here seeking advice, and use none of it. You learned a very hard lesson. You almost learned this lesson at the expense of you going to court and having a serious black mark on your record. Next time you like a girl and she just doesn't like you, stop about 55,000 texts back. You should be so lucky you did this to a girl who was so forgiving. The next time you do this, you can either be meeting with her lawyer or in a bloody pulp in some dark alley after her "friends" or her father make a visit to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author doomage Posted November 16, 2009 Author Share Posted November 16, 2009 I doubt she would have done it but the fact that she said it makes it easier for me to let go. She doesn't ever want to come across as the bad person but i pushed her buttons too much. after i called her a bitch it was game over. she could treat me however she wanted to after i said that. She just holds grudges for far too long with everybody. Link to post Share on other sites
mushmush Posted November 18, 2009 Share Posted November 18, 2009 I was actually surprised when I came across this thread.. and reading this thread was like masterbating with a cheese grator. Slightly amusing, but mostly painful!!! I really didn't think you would go down this path after the advice we gave you. Why are you still in denial??? I think she would have called the cops if you kept on harrassing her. You did move down into stalker territory. all I can say is. Make sure you learn your lesson from this experience Link to post Share on other sites
Author doomage Posted November 18, 2009 Author Share Posted November 18, 2009 our whole friendship she gave me clues as to what to do and how to handle things but i gnored them, she told me to get over her and just treat her like a friend, but i ignored that, and now i don't even see her at school anymore so she's tryna make it easy for me to forget about her by not having a chance to see her anymore. i know i can go to her job and talk to her there but for what. I already tried talking so theres nothing left to do anymore. It's just hard i feel like we just broke up or something even though we were only friends lol. We always acted like a couple but we were never in a relationship it was like a relationship without the sex and i was just her girlfriend with a pair of balls. i gonna be nc going as hard as it is. Link to post Share on other sites
mushmush Posted November 19, 2009 Share Posted November 19, 2009 Yup you could go to her work and get a restraining order put against you. There are other woman out there, someone who WILL apprieciate you for who you are. Link to post Share on other sites
Author doomage Posted November 26, 2009 Author Share Posted November 26, 2009 Yup you could go to her work and get a restraining order put against you. There are other woman out there, someone who WILL apprieciate you for who you are. Well my job is super close to hers and so when i go to work i drive right infront of the restaurant where she works/worked and i don't see her aunts car anymore (she used to use it to go to work) the days i know she would be there, i haven't seen it anymore and i haven't seen her at school either, she signed out of her math class. and now i feel like she may be moving from here if she's not working or going to school. i mean the semester isn't even over yet. i feel like she quit her job and school maybe because of me?? it's been real hard to not text her again but i've been doing a good job and haven't spoke to her since the whole police threat. just so hard though Link to post Share on other sites
Slainte Posted November 26, 2009 Share Posted November 26, 2009 (edited) Get out and do something social, involving a new group of friends. You need a new foundation if possible, and need to distance yourself from her in places like school and work, when there just focus on the work and nothing else as your mind will stray back to her. I went through three years in a similiar situation, had a lot more emotionally invested in the person than they had in me, and so I ended up being consumed by this person, spending immeasurable amounts of time and emotion thinking of them and elaborate schemes to win them back towards my side (all of these failed, and annoyed her more). Needless to say, all it did was further isolate me from her and others at large, who still view me in the shadow of my obsession. Thankfully, time has allowed it to fade away and two depressive episodes (as my psychologist diagnosed them) later, I'm back to my normal self and am able to focus on things other than a false start relationship. You mightn't be this far in, but it sounds similar to how my trouble started off, so do the right thing for yourself, and bin it now. Edited November 26, 2009 by Slainte Link to post Share on other sites
Author doomage Posted November 26, 2009 Author Share Posted November 26, 2009 well i doubt i will ever see her again since she signed out of her class or college for that matter, mayb becasue of me and i think she quit her job so the only way i could see her is if i go to her house which i won't do lol.i think she's gonna move back to new jersey, she wasn't happy here and plus her ex lives back in jersey so if anything she might go back to him. it's a messed up situation but little by little im getting myself back in shape. I totally let her consume me and let her run me around like a ragdoll emotionally. i won't give my power away like that again. thanks for all the help people and if i would have had my stuff together when i first met her i would have probably never settled to be just friends with her. would have saved me some heartache, but i don't regret it because this experience helped me to realize some of my faults i need to fix and improve so a girl that actually appreciates me doesn't have to be with a needy clingy guy. Link to post Share on other sites
Slainte Posted November 27, 2009 Share Posted November 27, 2009 well i doubt i will ever see her again since she signed out of her class or college for that matter, mayb becasue of me and i think she quit her job so the only way i could see her is if i go to her house which i won't do lol. i think she's gonna move back to new jersey, she wasn't happy here and plus her ex lives back in jersey so if anything she might go back to him. it's a messed up situation but little by little im getting myself back in shape. I totally let her consume me and let her run me around like a ragdoll emotionally. i won't give my power away like that again. thanks for all the help people and if i would have had my stuff together when i first met her i would have probably never settled to be just friends with her. would have saved me some heartache, but i don't regret it because this experience helped me to realize some of my faults i need to fix and improve so a girl that actually appreciates me doesn't have to be with a needy clingy guy. Now that I had time to read back over the thread, I can see your situation started out very similar to my own but I think you've been spared a lot of the trouble I went through, thankfully. Likewise, I should have been content with being friends rather than attempting to force the pace. I still hear about the girl in my situation, and she still lives only 5 minutes away, both thanks to the small town rural setting. I've no doubt I'll see her again soon enough due to one of the fact that one of my coping methods was getting out and involved in a lot of causes and local politics. Its a hard lesson to learn, but I learnt it as well. Don't let your expectations of someone nor their actions govern your life emotionally. I, too, am working on fixing the faults that were highlighted by my similar episode 6 months ago, I'm now much stronger. I wish you the best with your efforts, and remember that you're not alone. There's probably billions of people who have experienced similar episodes. Link to post Share on other sites
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