Boyfriend or Best guy friend?

[krispie83]

Kind of new to this but here goes. I'm 26 and have been with my boyfriend, who is 29, for almost 4 years. I never thought I would love someone as much as I love him. For the past year and a half he has been seriously ill and has had many surgery to try and cure him, which still is continuing. Before he became sick we were starting to talk about getting married. Since he doesn't have medical insurance his family and I have been paying for everything out of pocket. For the past 6 months he has been in a treatment center for his depression, so I haven't been able to see him in over 6 months and really only have communication with his brother who I don't get along with.

Now here's the problem. My best guy friend, who is also 26, for over 6 years, who lives many states away, has started telling me how much loves me and wants to be with me. He has even started to think about moving closer to me. He keeps promising the world to me and to take care of me. Now, my very independent, but it would be nice to have someone take care of me for once.

So, pretty much I don't know what to do. I love my boyfriend more any anything, but I also have feeling for my best friend but am not sure what kind of feelings they are. So do I move on to someone who will treat me right and be there everyday for me once he moves, or do I keep putting myself into debt for someone I never see or talk to but am in love with? Help!!!

[Javelin]

Kind of new to this but here goes. I'm 26 and have been with my boyfriend, who is 29, for almost 4 years. I never thought I would love someone as much as I love him. For the past year and a half he has been seriously ill and has had many surgery to try and cure him, which still is continuing. Before he became sick we were starting to talk about getting married. Since he doesn't have medical insurance his family and I have been paying for everything out of pocket. For the past 6 months he has been in a treatment center for his depression, so I haven't been able to see him in over 6 months and really only have communication with his brother who I don't get along with.

Now here's the problem. My best guy friend, who is also 26, for over 6 years, who lives many states away, has started telling me how much loves me and wants to be with me. He has even started to think about moving closer to me. He keeps promising the world to me and to take care of me. Now, my very independent, but it would be nice to have someone take care of me for once.

So, pretty much I don't know what to do. I love my boyfriend more any anything, but I also have feeling for my best friend but am not sure what kind of feelings they are. So do I move on to someone who will treat me right and be there everyday for me once he moves, or do I keep putting myself into debt for someone I never see or talk to but am in love with? Help!!!

 

Instead of jumping ship, why don't you take some time to yourself?

 

If I were you, I'd explain to your current boyfriend's family that the situation is extremely hard on you and you're also very lonely.. You also need to explain to your so-called friend that you're in a bad situation right now and need some time to yourself.

 

I say this because it seems to me like there's far too much pressure coming from both ends at the moment. It also looks like your friend is trying to take advantage of your vulnerable state, instead of offering sound advice to help you cope.

Edited November 12, 2009 by Javelin