Jacksin Posted June 12, 2004 Share Posted June 12, 2004 You sound like a real selfish bitch by saying you only want this and that. Why on earth did you marry this poor sod anyway? Its a two way street. I know a divorced woman who says no man asks her out to dinner. I told her its because she wont put out, she disagreed and I chuckle when I think how she is still sitting home alone I feel extremely sorry for your husband and think you are a cold blooded fool Jack Link to post Share on other sites
Kat Posted June 12, 2004 Share Posted June 12, 2004 Originally posted by guest more energy into things that I love such as my kids, Umm you need to have sex to get kids Link to post Share on other sites
Jacksin Posted June 14, 2004 Share Posted June 14, 2004 Not necessarily Kat, if they are someone elses. Jack Link to post Share on other sites
bd Posted July 4, 2004 Share Posted July 4, 2004 I hesitate to post - what with the "Judgemental & Attack mode" towards "guest's" inquiry. But wanting to let "guest" know she is not alone in her perception & wishes. Obviously, "guest" has issues - who doesn't? I can personally relate. I honestly don't understand the importance of sex. As kids were told to stay away from it - as adults we're told it's "healthy" & somehow important - what happens between 17 & 18 or single & marriage that changes so much? I maintain this "Sex is Healthy" cult is a myth! How is passing germs back & forth "healthy" - heck - I don't even like sharing the same glass!! I am married - have 2 kids - I have never been sexually abused, but have never understood the appeal of sex. It was a means to an end w/the kids, but is no longer necessary. I know, I know - what about my husbands' "needs" - Gawd, I hate that associating "need" w/sex - we don't "need sex" - we "need" food, water, shelter....! I don't know. What about my grandparents - they had separate rooms/ beds after their kids were born - and seemed perfectly content. I have very, very, very rare desire - I do have definite intimacy & performance anxiety issues - so the only "sex" that appeals to me is sex w/a stranger - someone I will never see again. I am in counseling ref; other personal issues - the further I get from "sex" the more relaxed I seem to feel - yet the more anxious I get about being "called on the carpet"! In summary, "guest" - you are not alone! I can relate. I do agree that you probably need to make sure your husband & you are on the "same page" -, and getting some quality therapy might help you address some stuff - not for your husband - but in the interest of your kids!! You are their role model for relationships - kindness, respect, and friendship are much, much, much more important in my book! Link to post Share on other sites
Mr Spock Posted July 4, 2004 Share Posted July 4, 2004 Do you masturbate? At all? Link to post Share on other sites
guest Posted July 4, 2004 Share Posted July 4, 2004 Originally posted by bd I hesitate to post - what with the "Judgemental & Attack mode" towards "guest's" inquiry. But wanting to let "guest" know she is not alone in her perception & wishes. Obviously, "guest" has issues - who doesn't? I can personally relate. I honestly don't understand the importance of sex. As kids were told to stay away from it - as adults we're told it's "healthy" & somehow important - what happens between 17 & 18 or single & marriage that changes so much? I maintain this "Sex is Healthy" cult is a myth! How is passing germs back & forth "healthy" - heck - I don't even like sharing the same glass!! I am married - have 2 kids - I have never been sexually abused, but have never understood the appeal of sex. It was a means to an end w/the kids, but is no longer necessary. I know, I know - what about my husbands' "needs" - Gawd, I hate that associating "need" w/sex - we don't "need sex" - we "need" food, water, shelter....! I don't know. What about my grandparents - they had separate rooms/ beds after their kids were born - and seemed perfectly content. I have very, very, very rare desire - I do have definite intimacy & performance anxiety issues - so the only "sex" that appeals to me is sex w/a stranger - someone I will never see again. I am in counseling ref; other personal issues - the further I get from "sex" the more relaxed I seem to feel - yet the more anxious I get about being "called on the carpet"! In summary, "guest" - you are not alone! I can relate. I do agree that you probably need to make sure your husband & you are on the "same page" -, and getting some quality therapy might help you address some stuff - not for your husband - but in the interest of your kids!! You are their role model for relationships - kindness, respect, and friendship are much, much, much more important in my book! so did my grandparents. but they snuck into eachothers rooms. yeha, once I spent the night and my grampa didn't know it. well, he came in and found me there 2 and said ugh... g2g.! haha. and they STILL have sex with seperate bedrooms! Link to post Share on other sites
Jacksin Posted July 5, 2004 Share Posted July 5, 2004 Is your husband still with you bd , or did he run off with the first bit of skirt that came along? Bd you sound so cold and heartless. I dont think the 'judgemental and attack' mode would hurt your feelings as you dont seem to have any after you said your kids were a means to an end. Do you work or does your hubby provide for you with nothing in return from you? Boy some people Jack Link to post Share on other sites
meanon Posted July 5, 2004 Share Posted July 5, 2004 What advice are you offering Jack? Of course bd has feelings, she just doesn't like sex. She's right, many people don't. we don't "need sex" - we "need" food, water, shelter....! bd, I hate to tell you this, but many of us "need" sex to the extent that we would prefer it to food, shelter .... Of course kindness, respect, and friendship are important too. Most people want the lot. Don't write it off just yet, it may be that the reason you don't get anything out of it is because, for you, sex and intimacy do not go together. I hope the therapy helps you achieve this. Link to post Share on other sites
itsyvonne Posted July 7, 2004 Share Posted July 7, 2004 this 'guest' person seems like a troll. I am not one of those who suspects trolls at every corner, but this one sure has the earmarks of just wanting to stir things up. Either that or she is taking an SSRI and therefore is sexually numb. I just don't see how you can eliminate sexual attraction when attracted to someone of the opposite sex (or same sex if you are gay). Link to post Share on other sites
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