Luna Tears Posted November 24, 2009 Share Posted November 24, 2009 (edited) Okay I'm 99 percent sure my boyfriend is going to propose to me at Christmas. It will be his first offical Christmas with my family. I asked him if he wanted to come over for Christmas and he replied yes but in a very monotone way, not a happy or excited yes. I asked him what he was going to give me for Christmas and all he said "It will be something that will benefit you for the rest of your life." We had a bit of a fallening out a week and half ago, how ever we are over it. I didn't speak to him for four days after we fought. So when I sat down and talked he poured out how he is feeling and what has been bothering him about me. Such as that I am not talkative (well I'm awarkard in social sitautions) when I'm with other people. That he wants me to work on my body (I have a bad posture and me being slightly over weight and weak muscles hasn't helped it any) so that he can feel proud of me and I in turn told him what has been bothering me. He ended by saying "Ever since Sunday night, I have been thinking alot about the future and where we stand." The next night when we had sex, he whispered in my ear that he is at the stage in his life that he wants a family and said "I want you to have my baby." That made me go (O) . (O) when he said it. It surprised me as I have thought of kids but not sure where I stand with it. Although I'm sure he talked to his mother about it because the night we had prior to the fight, I was talking to his mother and she was talking about pregnancy and finished with glancing away from me saying "You have to be healthy to have a baby." Guys I'm sure he is going to propose, a few weeks ago he tried on a ring that I took off my marriage finger which I wore in a play and it just fit his little finger. Yesterday he was sitting beside me when I was scrolling down my friends photos on facebook and he piped "Is that an engagement ring?" It could be because it was a ring but I'm not sure, it was the only thing he said about my friends photos. While I showed him a save the date postcard my cousin sent to my parents. He looked at it intentivly and I said it was the most tackiest thing I ever seen. He just nodded and only commented "She has lovely handwriting." Why I'm confused, well as I said he wants me to work on my body and since it is on the verge of Summer I want to start loosing weight and strengthen my muscles. Just that on the phone, he asked me over and gave me a list of shopping he wants me to get and finished with "Remember I'm still thinking of the future." That is why I'm confused. WTH does he mean "Remember I'm still thinking of the future." Is this a hint or something? I'm in my mid 20s and he is in his mid 30s. (He has never married and doesn't have children.) We have been dating for almost four years. Edited November 24, 2009 by Luna Tears spelling Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted November 24, 2009 Share Posted November 24, 2009 Yea, all that is circumstantial though. I know first hand, don't get your hopes up on any holiday by "clues." Just wait for it to happen and go into each holiday unassuming. I do hope it happens for you though! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Luna Tears Posted November 24, 2009 Author Share Posted November 24, 2009 Thanks Laurie, I know what you mean, I am seeing the signs of a possible proposal at Christmas. As you said I shouldn't give my hopes up lol. I'm just going to wait it out and act "surprise" if it does come into fruation. I'm still not sure on the whole "future" thing. Why he is thinking about it when only nights before he said "I want you to have my baby."? Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted November 24, 2009 Share Posted November 24, 2009 Thanks Laurie, I know what you mean, I am seeing the signs of a possible proposal at Christmas. As you said I shouldn't give my hopes up lol. I'm just going to wait it out and act "surprise" if it does come into fruation. I'm still not sure on the whole "future" thing. Why he is thinking about when only nights before he said "I want you to have my baby." Just an idea, but marriage and babies sometimes don't go together. Maybe he just wants to have a baby and not get married right now? By the way, how do YOU feel about the whole baby situation? Do you want to have one with him? Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted November 24, 2009 Share Posted November 24, 2009 It seems to me that you're overthinking and over-analyzing the hell out of this to the point of causing alot of unnecessary anxiety to yourself. Relax. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Luna Tears Posted November 24, 2009 Author Share Posted November 24, 2009 Yes I have fantaised on having children. Me and him have discussed name etcs. Just that now perhaps he might be proposing. I'm sure his parents wouldn't like it if we had a child out of wedlock. Besides he wants the child to have his surname. I don't want to overthink it. Link to post Share on other sites
Sweetcheripie Posted November 24, 2009 Share Posted November 24, 2009 Just curious...how old are you? Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted November 24, 2009 Share Posted November 24, 2009 Just curious...how old are you? She said in her OP that she was in her mid 20's but did not give her specific age. Link to post Share on other sites
Sweetcheripie Posted November 24, 2009 Share Posted November 24, 2009 She said in her OP that she was in her mid 20's but did not give her specific age. Thanks - I didn't see that last line. Oops! The original post just sounded so young. The "things" that bothered him would bother me about him. Being shy and not talkative sounds like a core personality trait and not sure it is something that can be changed for someone else. Getting proposed to is not the end all - make sure HE is someone you want to live the rest of your life. Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted November 24, 2009 Share Posted November 24, 2009 Thanks - I didn't see that last line. Oops! The original post just sounded so young. The "things" that bothered him would bother me about him. Being shy and not talkative sounds like a core personality trait and not sure it is something that can be changed for someone else. Getting proposed to is not the end all - make sure HE is someone you want to live the rest of your life. He actually sounds really controlling also! Like he wants her to work on her body and wants her to be more talkative and social. I find it ironic though that he wants her to lose weight but then turns around and wants to get her pregnant! Luna, do YOU want to lose weight and work on your body? Do you want to be more outgoing and social? Do these things for YOURSELF not so he will propose to you/love you. Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted November 25, 2009 Share Posted November 25, 2009 After what the OP wrote, I'd actually be thinking the EXACT OPPOSITE of what she is. What would benefit her for the rest of her life, after all of his complaints about her, and how she isn't what he wants? A breakup. Link to post Share on other sites
parky-our-zeppelin Posted November 25, 2009 Share Posted November 25, 2009 He's going to buy you a treadmill, better luck next time I'd be psyched if I got a treadmill!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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