Author agentsmith Posted December 5, 2009 Author Share Posted December 5, 2009 Get some condoms... but you get my drift. :laugh: no seriously. Link to post Share on other sites
jerbear Posted December 5, 2009 Share Posted December 5, 2009 :laugh: no seriously. Have dinner, be yourself, be more touchy and intimate; this isn't an Olive Garden date. You two can be more frank and remember to set the mood and her mood. Let her see, know, and smell the real agentsmith. Aka take shower but don't bath yourself in aftershave or cologne. You two are not "friends" anymore but heading toward BF/GF. Remember to touch her hand when grabbing the salt or pepper shakers. Eat from each other's plates to try the food. Don't over do it. Link to post Share on other sites
sugar_and_spice Posted December 6, 2009 Share Posted December 6, 2009 Fantastic. Hope your post dinner date went well. Link to post Share on other sites
Author agentsmith Posted December 6, 2009 Author Share Posted December 6, 2009 Things went really well. Link to post Share on other sites
Yukikazi Posted December 6, 2009 Share Posted December 6, 2009 Things went really well. Is that post coital smugness I detect? Link to post Share on other sites
sugar_and_spice Posted December 6, 2009 Share Posted December 6, 2009 fast work lol Link to post Share on other sites
Phateless Posted December 6, 2009 Share Posted December 6, 2009 (edited) I edited half the stuff out from the post but it's still really long! Sorry. ---------- The dinner/'date' was great! Things turned out much better than I had hoped for! I picked her up and then we left for dinner, initially talking about work and other general things. Then she brought up about the other girl. I told her that we don't have much in common, so I'm not into her much. She said that I didn't have to hide it from her if I actually was serious and that I had earlier said that we were serious, to which I replied that I had simply stated that we had been dating for a while, not that we were very close and serious. She smiled (and tried to say something but stopped at "I thought...") at that and looked quite happy through the rest of the meal. She even held my hand for sometime while we were sitting there. When I went to drop her off, she asked me to come up for coffee. We sat down on the sofa and she said, "so, you're still single right?" I told her I was, adding jokingly, "I'm still waiting." She asked for what, and I answered, "I think you know." She didn't reply, just looked at, smiling pretty affectionately this time. She then put her head on my shoulders, I put my arms around her, and we just sat like that for a while. She suddenly looked at me and asked me if I still felt the same way as earlier. I wasn't too sure what to say, but I decided to be honest. Her: I wanted to tell you something. Me: Go ahead. Her: I...I didn't mean what I told you. Me: Didn't mean what? Her: You know, that I never looked at you in the romantic way. Me: And...? Her: Uh...I do, I mean, I do feel the same...as you do...I just wasn't... Me: Yeah? Her: wasn't ready. She then told me about what all she had to face in the last one and that she took a really long time to recover from it. I knew most of this through her friend, but some of the stuff she told me yesterday was pretty shocking. She really had to go through a lot. She didn't say much for a while, so I held her hand and hugged her. She hugged back and held on for quite a while. Her: Do you still want to be with me? Me:You know that I do. You? She kissed me on the cheek. I responded by slowly kissing her on the lips, and she kissed back :) We did a bit of 'other stuff' as well, (no, that does not include sleeping with her). ----------- As you can imagine, I'm over the moon:):) Honestly didn't think we'd be kissing and all today. ---------- I TOLD YOU SO! :bunny::bunny: Let this be a lesson to anyone who has ever heard the "Let's just be friends" speech. Agent - congrats on getting the girl you want! Enjoy it but make sure you retain your independence. My work here is done. Edited December 6, 2009 by Phateless Link to post Share on other sites
aaron12 Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 wow congrats. best of luck. good that you didn't give up on her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author agentsmith Posted December 7, 2009 Author Share Posted December 7, 2009 (edited) Is that post coital smugness I detect? yes Agent - congrats on getting the girl you wantEnjoy it but make sure you retain your independence. thanks, I will. Edited December 7, 2009 by agentsmith Link to post Share on other sites
gypsy_nicky Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Amen Phateless Amen Link to post Share on other sites
christian6 Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Didn't look like she wanted to be with you from your earlier posts, looks like she's a good actress. lol Link to post Share on other sites
tigressA Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 I followed this entire thread and just wanted to say congrats! So excited for you! Link to post Share on other sites
Yukikazi Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Didn't look like she wanted to be with you from your earlier posts, looks like she's a good actress. lol She did.. she just didn't realize it till he started backing off. Women may say they know what they want.. but that a. dosen't mean they actually do b. Like shy guys.. not know how to go about getting it. c. been trained that being sexual is taboo In this case.. she got burned in the past.. thought she wasn't ready to try again and was stringing the OP along taking her own sweet time. Once she realized he wasn't just gonna sit around and wait for her.. she realized she would have to step up or risk loosing the guy. Its not that she didn't want him.. she obviously did.. just didn't know how to get started again w/o the appropriate pull from the OP. He pulled she came after him.. they are both now happy. In one of the last posts where he gave us the after dinner report.. she even stated she lied earlier about not being romantically interested. Had the OP not proceeded the way he did by pulling back.. he wouldn't have gotten the girl. Link to post Share on other sites
christian6 Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 It just looked to me that he was reading too much into what she said about missing him a lot when he was 'busy'. Link to post Share on other sites
Phateless Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Didn't look like she wanted to be with you from your earlier posts, looks like she's a good actress. lol Honestly, this whole mess is the OP's fault in the first place for not grabbing his balls and making a move in the first place. She always wanted him, he just put her on the spot before and she panicked. Link to post Share on other sites
Yukikazi Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 It just looked to me that he was reading too much into what she said about missing him a lot when he was 'busy'. Have you ever known a girl to say she misses a guy when she actually dosen't? She didn't miss him untill he wasn't around as much anymore.. you know the saying "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" once she realized she was possibly loosing him.. she got out of her own way and accepted his affection and returned it... its psychology. Link to post Share on other sites
Author agentsmith Posted December 7, 2009 Author Share Posted December 7, 2009 Honestly, this whole mess is the OP's fault in the first place for not grabbing his balls and making a move in the first place. She always wanted him, he just put her on the spot before and she panicked. If I'd made a move earlier, I'm not sure if she would have reacted the same way. When I had told her, she was still undergoing counselling, so I don't know how ready she was a relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 So, when they're bouncing grandkids on their knee watching old re-runs of Rudolph the red-nosed Reindeer, they can remember this time with fondness. Re-reading this thread was a nice positive experience. I don't mind being wrong when the result is right (for them). Hope it goes well Link to post Share on other sites
Yukikazi Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Agent's got the whole "How I met your mother" sitcom going right here. Link to post Share on other sites
christian6 Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 I didn't doubt that she did miss him, what I am saying is that she could have simply meant that she missed him even if she looked at him only as a friend, hence my reaction that it didn't look like she was into him earlier. Link to post Share on other sites
dnm Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 The last time I read this thread, you were trying to decode what her 'I miss you' really meant. Since then I'm reading this thread only now, and you've already slept with her. Wow. Link to post Share on other sites
ella23 Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Congrats, really happy for you:) Link to post Share on other sites
ella23 Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Let this be a lesson to anyone who has ever heard the "Let's just be friends" speech. yes exactly Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 But beware of the other threads here about persistent men being viewed as 'unappealing' and 'creepy' by women. Take all the variables and advice seen here, offer it up in an ostensibly similar dynamic with two other people and it can and likely would turn out completely differently (not necessarily 'badly'). Now our OP can offer up his experience as advice to another poster, adding to the chorus of experiences, hoping they'll get it right for themselves, and offering comfort if they don't. True value of the community, IMO. Link to post Share on other sites
ella23 Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 But beware of the other threads here about persistent men being viewed as 'unappealing' and 'creepy' by women. Take all the variables and advice seen here, offer it up in an ostensibly similar dynamic with two other people and it can and likely would turn out completely differently (not necessarily 'badly'). Now our OP can offer up his experience as advice to another poster, adding to the chorus of experiences, hoping they'll get it right for themselves, and offering comfort if they don't. True value of the community, IMO. yep... but he wasn't persisting was he? he backed off completely and she started chasing him! i don't think being persistent would be fruitful. Link to post Share on other sites
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