Unsure of how to pursue an unconventional online relationship

[smg09e]

Some basic info: I'm 21, male, and I live in the Southeast. She's 23 and lives in the midwest; we'll call her Allison.

 

We met online 5 years ago in a completely platonic manner. We both post on a very small message board (only about 20 regular posters) that was created in 2005, and ever since its inception there are 7 or 8 of us who have become a very closely-knit circle of internet friends.

 

I met Allison and her roommate (who also posts on the message board with us) in person for the first time in 2008. We had a great time, but of course we were only friends. By this time I had been slowly developing feelings for her, though.

 

Seven of us, including Allison and I, decided to meet up as a group in July 2009. It was an amazing weekend and we were all so happy to finally meet each other in person after only interacting online for 4 years. By this point Allison and I had become very good friends and had helped each other through a number of problems and difficult situations. We had built up a high level of trust in one another.

 

It was after this meeting that I knew I was in love with her. The seven of us met up again for another fun weekend a few weeks ago, and this time I had every intention of testing the waters to see if she had any interest in me beyond friendship. We stayed in a hotel suite for the weekend. I could sense flirtations between the two of us, but ultimately I think she was too distracted by our other friends because we all hardly ever see each other, so her mind was way too focused on everyone as a whole.

 

I really want to tell her how I feel, but I think that it might be too soon; even though we have met in person 3 times, I don't feel like she has been able to connect with me on a real, potentially-romantic level because we haven't spent much time alone together in person.

 

This is where I'm at a loss. If this were a normal situation and she lived in the same area as me, I would simply ask her out on a few dates and see where that led us. However, my problem is that I haven't been able to spend much one-on-one, in-person time with her, so I don't feel that she has been able to see me in a romantic light. I've had her phone number for years and have called her, but she rarely if ever answers her phone; that's just the type of person she is. Therefore, how do you take it to the next level when 90% of your interaction takes place among mutual friends on the internet?