Patty Posted December 14, 2003 Share Posted December 14, 2003 For the hec of it I typed out my Indians first and last name in the search box,to see what would come up. And his came up and the address that he had givin to me matched the same one I found on the site.When I read marital status,it said that he is married.Should I ask him about this? Im not trying to be nosey,im just wondering about it. Thanks. Patty Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted December 14, 2003 Share Posted December 14, 2003 Patty. Why do you continue in a relationship with this man who uses you for sexual pleasure? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Patty Posted December 14, 2003 Author Share Posted December 14, 2003 Im not.I just had no idea he was married. Patty Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted December 14, 2003 Share Posted December 14, 2003 So now you know he's untruthful, too. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Patty Posted December 14, 2003 Author Share Posted December 14, 2003 Yes,I know. Patty Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted December 14, 2003 Share Posted December 14, 2003 Just because an Internet page says he's married doesn't make it so. Verify all things with the source and show them what you have found. Do it in a kind, discrete way. There is a lot of misinformation on the Internet. This is why doing research is very challenging for those who do it for a living. There are other ways of finding out including doing a search on the site of the Clerk of the Court's office in the county which he lives. The have records of marriage licenses and divorces...if those took place in that county. There are a host of other ways of finding out if he's married and verifying it. Just never trust the word of people in matters such as this and, for Gawd's sake, don't trust the Internet. People's official credit reports get screwed up every single day by professionals. Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted December 14, 2003 Share Posted December 14, 2003 it doesn't matter if this guy is married, in the end. he asks Patty to do unappropriate things in front of her webcam, and i believe she should stop talking to him immediately and never look/think back. trying to figure out if he's married is a waste of time - who cares?? -yes Link to post Share on other sites
cindy0039 Posted December 14, 2003 Share Posted December 14, 2003 I agree. And it's much more likely that a person would SAY they're single when they're really married than vice versa, don't you think? Patty, you need to face the truth. This guy is bad news. He is not a true friend. He uses you and asks for inappropriate things. If he's married and going around on the internet looking for girls to show him their bodies, that is totally WRONG and disgusting. How would your boyfriend feel if he knew about this guy and the kind of "friendship" you have with him? Honestly, do YOU think it's okay? If you have any uncomfortable feelings about it, then it's wrong...period. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Patty Posted December 14, 2003 Author Share Posted December 14, 2003 How would your boyfriend feel if he knew about this guy and the kind of "friendship" you have with him? I told myself a number of times,I dont deserve my bf.I didnt do it on purpose.I didnt mean for it to happen.I still cant understand why I did it.The best way I can put it is,I feared loosing his friendship.My bf would understand,that I did not choose to do this.Mistakes do happen.Yes,Im real mad at myself right now and all I do is cry all the time.Just cause it happened,doesnt mean it was done on purpose. Patty Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted December 14, 2003 Share Posted December 14, 2003 there's no need to cry, patty, just block this indian guy from your email, IM, whatever else you use to communicate with him - just never say or type a word to him again. -yes Link to post Share on other sites
Author Patty Posted December 14, 2003 Author Share Posted December 14, 2003 I feel so ashamed and dont know how to tell my mother or bf about this. Patty Link to post Share on other sites
PurpleAngel Posted December 14, 2003 Share Posted December 14, 2003 Patty honey, we have all done things in our past that have served for a learning purpose. It breaks my heart to hear you like this and I am sad that you are being so hard on yourself. Be a little more compassionate with you. We all make mistakes and do things we shouldn’t but we learn from it and this is the main thing. Learn from this experience and put it down to one of those unexplainable moments that we just do things for whatever reason. Don’t harbour too much upset and sadness Patty, talk to us about it, get it off your chest but do not think you are bad for having done it. We all still think you are WONDERFUL and GREAT! In future, try not to do things out of fearing you will lose a friendship, do things because they are right for YOU! If they are really friends to you, they will respect and accept you for who you are. These are the types of friends you should want in your life. Thinking of you! Link to post Share on other sites
cindy0039 Posted December 14, 2003 Share Posted December 14, 2003 Originally posted by Patty I feel so ashamed and dont know how to tell my mother or bf about this. Patty There's no reason to tell your mother or your boyfriend. You've admitted it was a mistake. As long as you learned from it and don't plan to do it again, try to forget about it and move on. I agree with the other posters - don't talk to this guy anymore! He is NOT your friend. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Patty Posted December 14, 2003 Author Share Posted December 14, 2003 Thanks PurpleAngel,for the kind words. And thanks everyone for your help and opinions.Once I get beyond this,I'll be myself again and I'll be ok.But I havent been myself since.I guess,Im just in a bit of a shock right now. Patty Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted December 15, 2003 Share Posted December 15, 2003 Patty, please don't blame yourself. You are a very nice person, you believed this man was your friend, and you wanted to make him happy. You have too good a heart, Patty, and sometimes that can get very nice people like you in trouble. You don't have to tell your mom or your bf - you have us to tell and they don't ever need to know. I'm sorry you are sad. It is VERY disappointing when somebody you think is a friend does something very unkind to you or tries to use you. It has happened to me - it happens to pretty much everybody at least once because we hope we can trust our friends. Just remember to not trust people from the Internet. A place like LoveShack is different where there is a big group watching out for each other and moderators to make sure bad stuff doesn't happen, but you have to be VERY careful when you make friends with individual people, especially men, over the Internet. You should not be mad at yourself - you got the good idea to tell us about this man so we could warn you to protect yourself and that was very smart of you! take care Merry Link to post Share on other sites
Author Patty Posted December 15, 2003 Author Share Posted December 15, 2003 Thanks,moimeme.I think talking to people is helping me get through this.You all been very helpful. Patty Link to post Share on other sites
Duke Posted December 15, 2003 Share Posted December 15, 2003 You seem like a nice woman, I say dump anyone who doesn't make you feel good about yourself. Lifes too short to waste it on negative emotions such as doubt. Link to post Share on other sites
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