controlling abusive father

[cookiegirl]

i went through alot of abuse from my family. im 26 years old and female. im not married and have no boyfriend. i was in college and got hit by a car and stayed at my parents house to recuperate. i almost died and was very sick physically after that. but my parents did not help me. obviousely. i went to all doctors and hospitals by myself.

when i was toddler both parents started beating me daily. they screamed and cursed at me. when i was a toddler my mother tried to burn me at the stove and she threw sharp knives and pots and pans at me. there was alot of violence i witnessed in my home growing up at a young age. my parents would push me into dark closets and not let me out for minutes at a time. i was also sexually abused by my fathers friend as a small child. he is still friends with this man and no one called police and i was under age 6 at the time so i couldnt take legal action myself.he is also currently coworkers with and best friends with another sexual predator who got away with cheating on his wife and molesting his children. they all got away when they turned 18 and left the country.

i know the daughter well. we all know what happened to her and her sibling.

 

my parents did everything unimaginable to me. they would lock me in bathrooms for hours at a time. scrape my arms so they would bleed. i was knocked unconciouse at age 8 ,2 times after my head was bashed into the wall a bunch of times by my mother. i blacked out and woke up.

 

my mother began to punish me by not allowing me any food. i would get all my nutrition at school. i became emaciated and pale, my hair wouild fall out. it was an every day thing, they would chase me and find me and beat me. i could have died many times. these are big strong people. they are still stronger than me. they are both obese. i was chased by them with a knife, i had burning water thrown at me as i hid in a closet while my mother was looking for me to try to beat me. she found me and opened the door of the closet and tossed burning water at me. she punched me in thew face and broke my nose. she also sexually abused me when i hit puberty. whatever i went through i compare to satanic abuse rituals because its worse than any other story of abuse i hear. altho i never found evidence of satan worship on my house. or any cult like activity with my parents

they wouldnt let me socialize with other kids. i gave up hope and didnt expect to make it to my 10th birthday. it was not a normal family. i would get beat no matter what. if i asked for dinner i would be beaten. they wouldnt let me attend birthday parties or make friends.

they would severely neglect me. i was left home alone for entire nights starting at age 6. it terrified me. i was left home once with 103 fever at the age of 8. i had to give myself cold medicine and take my own temperature. yes this is true. i grew up early because of this.

 

they would turn my siblings against me as a competetition of who can do worse to me.

 

at age 14 i was amaciated and weak and dizzy all the time from not being allowed food.i had acid coming up all the time from my stomache cause i was not being allowed to have food. i couldnt focus on schoolwork when i was hungry so i called child protective services. wrong move. i grew up on the rich white side of town in a large house with a pool. wrong move. the 2 african american social workers took one look at the architecture of the house and decided based on that that i was not abused. they kept telling me how there were black babies and minority children less than half my age who needed their help too and how i was a teenager already and that i should just deal with it. they said im too old for a foster home. they closed the case cause i had no bruises at the time even tho i was underweight i weighed 95 pounds at 5"5. they figured since all of my siblings said everything was ok then it was ok. for them it was but not for me

long story but because of that my father had me put away. hes a narcisist. so with every provoking theres a revenge. he had to get revenge at me.

 

his revenge was to lock me in the looney bin with wild teens who were cutting themselves and talking to the wall.he began to exhibit symptoms of munchausens by proxy disease and he lied to the psychiatrist and made up a list of imaginary symptoms to try to force them to keep me and drug me.

 

without a highschool education. my parents didnt allow me to to attend highschool. i made it to 18 somehow and then i began to try to work on my education so i couild get away from them. i never hugged my father as far as i remember. i hugged my mother once at the age of 7 from what i remember. after that i was terrified or hit for asking

they allowed me to go to college after studying a few years after age 18 to get my ged and take the sats. but they forced me to live at home and commute.

so ill cut to the chase. i was hit by a car before i got to finish college. i almost died(again for the like 25th time)

 

i lost most of my mobility i was internally bleeding and hospitalized. it took me years to be able to stand up without falling down, or stand straight up. i spent years trying to walk without losing my balance and bent on 90 degree angle. no one helped me. i did everything on my own. my parents did nothing during thast time exceopt scream at me and torment me and make threats. they beat me too after the accidenyt and broke my sternum

 

they are breaking everyones bones. my mother broke my arm when i was 18

then when i was 22 my father broke my sternum and i suffered hart problems as a result of what he did. my older sister had her finger bent back and broken by my father. they knocked her tooth out too. they also murdered the family pet. its obviouse they are both a danger to society for decades and should be isolated from society if they keep breaking peoples bones, murdering our pet.

she also broke my nose when i was 8. so thats a nose, a sternum an arm, a finger and tooth.

 

im always a afraid wehat will happen to me next but im in chronic pain and was in chronic pain since the accident and unable to do what i used to or work. i was staying home recuperating.

 

my psychopath of a father got into a fight with me one saturday night while i had the flu and or strep and 102 fever. this was 2 years ago i remember being very sick but dont remember the diagnoses. i was out of it,headache,bodyache,fever,lethargic and he chose that time to contonue to pick fights with me. he didnt like something i said. so he vowed revenge in the form of court papers against me. i didnt believe him and with 102 fever and congestion and sneezing and coughing i could not defend myself or care for his games. within 2 weeks i was served court papers by him.

he got an order of protection against me by default because i was phsyically handicapped at the time and unable to walk or get to cxourt cause my mobility was impared. i was supposed to be in a wheelchair but i used a walker instead and forced myself to stay out of the wheelchair. i needed my independance and mobility. he got the order of protection against me but he told the judge he wants me to live in his house. this is a big angry and raging 6 foot tall man who weighs 350 pounds and has broken my bones and im 5"5 and weigh about 130 now and had mobility problems. you tell me who was the danger? i have a medical condition due to the starvation my parents forced on me that my bones are brittle and break easily even if someone punches me or i fall im fragile so i have to avoid any type of physical fight or athletic activity where i might fall. its rare at my age but it happens in anorexic girls and malnourished or cancer treated people. chemotherapy weakens kids, teens and young adults bones.

anyhow he went to court after that while i was on bed rest, to get adult guardianship of me. he said its because im going to die and according to my mother "today youre going to get ****ed up" thats her words to describe the court hearing before she left to court to testify with my father against me. he said its cause h didnt get even with me yet for the fight and he wont say much else. hes an impulsive narsasitic psychopath. so he does stupid things that put people in danger and he couldnt care less.

 

he got an expensive lawyer and got the guardianship and had the court rule that im mentally incapacitated. he told them i was born with mental retardation. and that im schitzophrenic.

im not schitzophrenic or mentally ill. my entire family and any past friends i had would never say im mentally ill. they did not think im mentally ill or schitzophrenic. im also not mentally retarded, i grew up early and not a mentaly disabled person

 

but now i have no rights. the judge gave my father guardianship of me. im a ward of the state. but eh does nothing as guardian. he dosnt help me or do anything for me or buy me anything/ he still screams at me and makes tghreats to me.

 

he is very controlling to my adult siblings and i, he says he dosnt want me marrying, having a job or career. dating anyone, earning money or moving away.

 

this is why im posting this. cause he controls me and i have no lawyer. he took all my moneyu and i have no money now to get a lawyer to help me. he forces me to stay in his home. i cant legally marry now, i cant get a job, drive a car or leave his home unless he goes to court and tries to get court permission which he wont do. he wants me to be put away for life in an institution even tho theres nothing wrong with me. i take care of my sisters children when they come over, all by myself with no one else around. they are 1 and 2 years old. i am recuperating so i can do 70% of what i used to now. my mobility is coming back very slowly like 5% improvement every 6 months.

my father is a jealous person he has always said he dosnt want me getting married. or having a life or contributing to the world. i had to beg him to let me go to college, he paid for my sisters to go to college so i needed help paying for college

 

anyhow he has all these things he can use against me to get me put away.

he had me commited to a mental hospital when i was a teen under age 18. 3 times for "evaluation" and to put me in some boot camp thing for rebelous teens. i ended up at a different boarding school thing but something happened to one of the kids there. a girl got raped and they decided to take me out and shove me back in to the psych hospital to hold me there till they figure out where to toss me. since i was under 18 i had no say. it was like human trafficking. anyhoe i told the staff there i got abused and about the starvation and because of thaty they thoiught i was delisional and they labeled me with schitzophrenia and drugged me because they thought i was lying to them or imagining the abuse

 

but it did happen

 

he is using this against me. telling the court im mentally retarded and schitzo for imaginign abuse. did i imagine being underweight and having kids ask me about bruises at school too? did i imagine the broken arm? maybe the exray machiine imagined the broken arm"? common stupid psychiatrists be real. im not making it up as terrible as it sounded.

he dosnt want to let me go, cause i think if he did he knows i would have a good and happy life and never speak to him ever again. if i was able to leave and get a job or loan to finish college and find a roommate id get an apartment in another state and never speak to him again

 

i feel like having him arrested sometimes because of the damage and physical abuse he caused/. i cant do anything now because a psychiatrist wrote that im schitzophrenic even tho theres no reason behind it other than them thinking i "imagined" abuse and believe its real. my sisters witnessed it but they wont help, they have talked to me about it.

the bruises didnt come from nowhere. im not a crazy person. i dont exhibit unusual behavior or thoughts. just when i try to tell my past or childhood memory it sounds made up because its so bad. my sisters all witnessed what happened to me and they told me but they wont stand up for me or help me

 

they refuse. end of that

 

i just talked to one of them yesterday about this, they said no way will they speak up for him or prove im telling the truth.

 

to each their own. each person for themselves

 

so i dont know what to do. this man owns me. ive been on the phone with legal aid for 16 months. calling every week and they refuse to help me. i called every distant relative and they dont want to get involved. i called the courts and they wont help. i called domestic violence agencies and they wont help. i called 2 police stations and they wont help. i called over 20 agencies and no one will help. they said they all dont deal with cases like this. guardianship cases. there is something called adult guardianship for mentally disabled or severely mentally disturbed adults who cannot think for themselves. like a person in a vegetatative state or coma also is under guardianship of someone chosen to make all medical decisions for them since they cant respond.

amazingly no one will help me and im rotting at my parents house with no way to get a job, i cant get money or food stamps i cant run away to a domestic violence shelter because there are police there and they will find me and bring me back to him against my will or they will have me sent to a looney bin or lifetime institution according to my sick fathers plan.

im a ward of the state and this sick man owns me. i dont concider him a father. he dosnt treat me like a daughter. i never had a relationship with him. i dont love him. im not sure how id feel if he went missing and no one found him. id have mixed feelings since im a compassionate human but id be releived that no one could hurt me anymore. even if he went missing the state would take ahold of me which is silly because im a 26 yr old adult who wont tolerate being pushed around

 

adult protective services came over to investigate and they said the only thing they can do for me is put me in a psych hospital for about a year and make me wait for placement in a life time nursing home or institution for th mentally disabled. didnt sound too apetising so i told them to leave. they said while i was in the institution my father could call and minotor me and check up on what dose and what psych drugs they were drugging me with. no thanks. thats past normal.

 

i dont believe in psychiatry and my parents need it and not me i have no diagnoses as long as the abuse i suffered is real which it is. doctors documented the abuse as being real, i have proof and a tape recording of my father saying he wants to kill me.

 

again i cant take any action or try to get away untill the court order is removed but it never will be. its a lifetime thing. if i try to make a move and the state or police catch me they will take me to live in the psych ward. not for me

 

i have some belief in scientology and am against psychiatric hospitalization of a woman who just wants to go away from her daddy and not have her bones broken anymore

 

i believe psych hospitals are supposed to be for people at emediate risk of suicide or those who are dangerous to others and actually crazy. and no a looney bin is not better then being in a home controlled by a grumpy and angry elderly man. its like 1 crazy dictator vs 20 crazy abusive hospital staff.

 

anyhow whats my next step other than staying here and rotting or trying to get help and ending up in the looney bin because i tried to escape. he has my passport and all my id and my social security number.

 

i could sit here on a monday after noon at 26 yrs old at my fathers house twittling my thumbs and playing computer games as my peers finish college,take graduate school classes, start careers and marry who they chose.

 

my life is getting dustier every minute and the clock is ticking.

 

whats the next step and no im not legally allowed to apply for a job,make and keep money, open a bank account, get food stamps or government support, write a will or let medical wishes be known, keep my medical care private from my father. if i see a gynecologist tomorow for example my father can call the office and hear all the details of my visit and diagnoses. yea stupid but he can find out all of my personal medical information now that he has legal control of me. im not allowed to legally sign marriage papers, sign a lease or cross state borders or leave the country or get on a plane. he can decide to make any medical decisions for me he choses.

if i had a boyfriend and got pregnant tomorow he can force me to have an abortion against my will. if i end up in the hospital needing surgery he can prevent me from getting surgery or medical treatment. he has that authority now. he has rights to chose where and with who i live, to force me to live places such as at home with him. i have no civil rights anymore. this is abuse

 

 

 

if he wants he can go to court and cutt me off from everyone completely and say who i can and cannot talk to. and people i know can get arrested for talking to me if he does that, but he didnt do that yet. the court papers dont say he has rights to say who i can call or talk to.

 

even if i make a run for it, without my id , passport ,birth certificate or any identifying papers. they will always be looking for me. the cops will have my picture. im a ward of the state. they will look for me the same way they would look for an 8 year old girl who went missing. even if i moved all the way to arizona from ny they would bring me to ny if they found me'

 

im from the usa

 

what can be done

[Nightsky]

You could call the news because this sounds like something they would be interested in and getting publicity could help.