lovebug24 Posted December 1, 2009 Share Posted December 1, 2009 Hello, So I have been working with a guy for about 5 years now. We have become really good friends over the years and about 4 years we slept together. This was after a night of drinking and afterwards there was a lot of tension but we eventually talked again and become closer friends but didn't speak of what happened until very recently. I am very attracted to this guy and I think he is attracted to me. He is always making eye contact with me, calls me 5-6 times a day just to talk, will text me on the weekends, even calls me while he is out of town on vacation. He tells me all the time that I look really nice and even takes me out to lunch. We have gone out for drinks with other friends and twice we have fooled around but again it's been after we both are drinking. There has been times though where we go out and he talks about other women or not being able to meet the right woman. He even tells me about women that he is attracted to and how he is looking to do online dating. Recently he invited me out where he was with some other guy friends. Once I got there he came over and sat with me almost the entire time. He asked me back to his house for a drink which I agreed to. We both had quite a bit to drink and ended up kissing. He told me that he loved me and that I mean so much to him. I told him that he was only saying this b/c of drinking and he said that no, it's the only time he can speak his mind. We did not sleep together b/c I stopped him. I care very much for this man and can't take sleeping with him again for it to mean nothing to him. Is this just a "friends with benefits" realtionship or does he have feelings for me? He did tell me last week that he is very shy and is insecure. He says he has trouble approaching women. Anyone have any thoughts on this? I really need to move on with my life and I am afraid to tell him how I feel for fear of losing my friendship and akward working realtionship with him. Any thoughts?? Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
boogieboy Posted December 1, 2009 Share Posted December 1, 2009 He doesnt like you enough to have a relationship with you. He knows you five years, there would be no reason he cant tell you how he feels sober after you two fooled around. Lost cause. I hope you havent been holding out on other guys for this one. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted December 1, 2009 Share Posted December 1, 2009 In five years have you actually seen him with another woman? Sounds like he has some social issues to work out on his own. Nothing wrong with being a friend if you can handle your feelings but I wouldn't pass up something more promising on the romantic front. BTDT and wasted a bunch of valuable time. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lovebug24 Posted December 1, 2009 Author Share Posted December 1, 2009 Thanks for the reply, I do appreciate the feedback. Yes I have seen him with other women. He actually started dating a girl not long after we slept together. He broke up with her about a year ago b/c he said he loved her but was not in love with her. He has since been single since they broke up. We did fool around while they were together and I felt terrible about it. I have had other realtionship with other men, I haven't been waiting on him b/c I guess in the back of my mind I knew it could never be. I am currently single and was thinking about putting it out there about how I felt. Sounds like I need to move on with the feelings that I have for this guy and maybe distance myself from him for a while. I don't think I can be such good friends while I have these feelings!! Thanks again!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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