HurtinginVA Posted December 16, 2003 Share Posted December 16, 2003 Why wont she stop?? For those of you who dont know, my husband had an affair with an 18 year old college freshman from another town. As of day before yesterday we talked and we were gonna try and make things work etc... Last night, we are in a rather compromising situation and his phone rings and it's her. He doesnt answer and doesnt tell me it's her until after we...... I tell him I want to hear the message so he lets me hear it, she sounds drunk, asking why he wont call her etc... He says he's sorry because he knows it hurts me to hear that stuff, and our night went from really good too really hurtful. He refused to call her right there in front of me and tell her to leave him alone. He would rather just ignore her, so he says. I know I have to trust, it's just so dang hard to. I feel like she is the biggest interference here, and since he isnt 100%sure about working things out, he's not inclined as he put it "to fight tooth and nail for this relationship.....yet". What does that mean? Yet? *sigh* These emotions could eat me alive if I let them. I wish this little girl would get a clue. Ive already called her and asked her to leave him alone. Maybe I should ask him to change his cell phone number? I dont know if that is too drastic of a step right now. I think it needs to be done though. Sorry. Had to vent. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted December 16, 2003 Share Posted December 16, 2003 I always look down upon these wives who call their husbands' mistresses and ask them to leave their husbands alone. It never works but only make fool of themselves. Link to post Share on other sites
Fancy Posted December 16, 2003 Share Posted December 16, 2003 It sounds to me like he playing BOTH of you. He's getting sex from you, saying he wants to work it out, but he's still not 100% sure and he's still receving calls from his girlfriend. I think you have every reason not to trust him. Are you using protection when you have sex with him? If not, you certainly should. I would also advise you to get yourself tested for AIDS and STDs. If you're smart, you'll tell hubby to hit the door and never call you again until he's 150% sure he can be faithful and will stay away from the 18 year old for good. Right now he's having his cake and eating it too and you're allowing it to happen. Link to post Share on other sites
cdn Posted December 16, 2003 Share Posted December 16, 2003 I think your husband needs to decide whether he wants to make his marraige work and, if he does, he needs to cut all ties with this girl. That includes telling her that he is rededicating himself to his marriage and telling her not to contact him. It is most definitely not your job to tell this girl that it's over - this will only be credible when she hears it from your husband. Frankly, I think your husband is trying to keep his options open and I don't think you can rebuild your marriage under those conditions. Nor would I think you'd want to. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts