saggy old husbands- are their wives really attracted to them?

[doushenka]

Conversely, the more breakfasts, lunches, and general sweetness I engage in, the less critical she is of my winter belly (which needs to, and will, go anyway though )

 

Aw, but winter bellies are so comfortable to cuddle with! Men who have them also tend to be warmer at night.

[Jersey Shortie]

Most men aren't rich. Most women don't mind. Most men think they deserve Victoria Secret models because that's what that big shiney moving picture attached to their wall told them.

[mem11363]

JS,

I think most men are simply afraid the cute girl they are currently dating will one day end up on the big shiney moving picture attached to their wall via an episode of the "Biggest Loser." Sadly current trends in diet, exercise and the growing prominence of victimology tend to make that anxiety more accurately described as a fear then a phobia.....

 

 

Most men aren't rich. Most women don't mind. Most men think they deserve Victoria Secret models because that's what that big shiney moving picture attached to their wall told them.

[hopeful1980]

JS,

I think most men are simply afraid the cute girl they are currently dating will one day end up on the big shiney moving picture attached to their wall via an episode of the "Biggest Loser." Sadly current trends in diet, exercise and the growing prominence of victimology tend to make that anxiety more accurately described as a fear then a phobia.....

 

Half the contestants on that show are men.

[angie2443]

Half the contestants on that show are men.

 

Yes, there are so many men with a weight problem. They rarely notice it, though. I think it's the women's fault. I think that women force themselves to look beyond a man's imperfect shape to the point where they'll tell a man with a beer belly that he is sexy and in perfect shape. I think there are many, many men walking thinking they are the hotest things on earth, when they have really let themselves go. Why can't they see that they let themselves go? Women tell them they look perfect!

[GorillaTheater]

Women tell them they look perfect!

 

Of course my wife tells me I look fantastic. Honesty is only one of her virtues.

[Jersey Shortie]

JS,

I think most men are simply afraid the cute girl they are currently dating will one day end up on the big shiney moving picture attached to their wall via an episode of the "Biggest Loser." Sadly current trends in diet, exercise and the growing prominence of victimology tend to make that anxiety more accurately described as a fear then a phobia.....

 

You're totally right. It's only women that gain weight and men remain 100% perfect well into their 80s. God what's wrong with us women? Seriously, I'm so sorry you and all the other men out there have to suffer such atrocities. Good thing you and all the other men have porn to turn to with teenagers and 20 year olds with perfect bodies. What else would you do with yourselves? That's what *real* men deserve anyway. Real women should be taken out back and shot whats they no longer fullfill his epitome of physical desire.

 

Isn't it ironic that women are naturally more fatty then men, and prescribed by mother nature, yet we are held to higher standards of fitness then men are? We're not allowed to be what nature intended. Even though men have more muscle and it is physically easier for them to remain in shape then women. Yet it's women that are consistantly critized and put down for their bodies.

 

And I don't think that has anything to do with women telling men "they're" perfect".

[Toodamnpragmatic]

You're totally right. It's only women that gain weight and men remain 100% perfect well into their 80s. God what's wrong with us women? Seriously, I'm so sorry you and all the other men out there have to suffer such atrocities. Good thing you and all the other men have porn to turn to with teenagers and 20 year olds with perfect bodies. What else would you do with yourselves? That's what *real* men deserve anyway. Real women should be taken out back and shot whats they no longer fullfill his epitome of physical desire.

 

Isn't it ironic that women are naturally more fatty then men, and prescribed by mother nature, yet we are held to higher standards of fitness then men are? We're not allowed to be what nature intended. Even though men have more muscle and it is physically easier for them to remain in shape then women. Yet it's women that are consistantly critized and put down for their bodies.

 

And I don't think that has anything to do with women telling men "they're" perfect".

 

And it comes out in all your posts.

 

But I will admit I watched the finale to the Biggest Loser and the two men who won were both married to much much fitter women with kids and both started at 430 and 467lbs..... The both lost 55% of their weight, which was incredible!!!

 

Have to admit the question to ask them is whether they were having regular sex with their wives, which is the question asked over and over???

 

Many people are married to overweight spouses, but does that mean they have fulfilling sex lives????

[Jersey Shortie]

How am I condsending to men Tood? What exactly in my post is condsending? I don't see it, it might be helpful to point it out.

 

And isn't my post about how I think men are condsending toward women about their bodies????

 

Are men or are men not often more critical on women for their bodies?

 

It sucks because we are naturally more fatty, that's the way nature made us. But somehow we are all suppose to be stick figures with huge breasts.

[confusedinkansas]

Jersey.......You Go Sista!! I'm behind ya 100%. Your posts are right on!

 

I don't think your post was condescending at all. How does it go....Men get better & more distinguished with age & women age like milk - And then get traded in for "newer, sexier, skinnier models":)

 

Good thing you and all the other men have porn to turn to with teenagers and 20 year olds with perfect bodies.

 

Most men think they deserve Victoria Secret models because that's what that big shiney moving picture attached to their wall told them.

[mem11363]

In summary:

- Women don't mind that men aren't rich

- Men have a giant sense of entitlement with regard to the appearance of their women

 

JS - This is why I say you are a male basher. Your posts consistently have this flavor. Women are not flawed - men are flawed.

 

You make a lot of negative comments about how men watch porn, and even those that don't can't be satisfied simply looking at the woman they are with.

 

I have no idea what you look like. And it doesn't matter nearly as much as you think. Two of the hottest women I ever met weren't that pretty from a traditional standpoint. But they sure were smart and fun and confident and they had this vibe that drove a male mad - me included.

 

There are plenty of guys who are not looking for a VS model, not sure where you are meeting men.

 

I truly believe that if you come across in person like you come across on this site, the average man is going to run away from what they perceive to be a giant chip on your shoulder. I don't know how it got their but, that chip is surely more unattractive then ANY physical imperfection you may have.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Most men aren't rich. Most women don't mind. Most men think they deserve Victoria Secret models because that's what that big shiney moving picture attached to their wall told them.

[Jersey Shortie]

Why are you trying to deflect and change this into a personal slant on me instead of dicussing the topic?

 

You don't like what I have to say. And that's fine. But spinning it your way and calling me a male basher just because you don't like what I have to say, is not cool. You rather bash me or make snide comments about who you think I am and how you think men react to me then directly talk about in agreement or disagreement with the things I said. Many men today DO think they deserve VS models. But since most men don't get that, they settle for average girls then spend the rest of their lives drooling over every other hot woman that crosses their path. Am I wrong? Seriously? Are you going to tell me I am wrong here? Men ARE critical about womens' bodies and DO make derogatory remarks about our bodies. Again, am I wrong? We both know I am not. Which is why you choose to make personal slants on me instead of taking the time to talk about my direct comments and disagreeing with them with hard proof.

[Sam Spade]

Yes, there are so many men with a weight problem. They rarely notice it, though. I think it's the women's fault. I think that women force themselves to look beyond a man's imperfect shape to the point where they'll tell a man with a beer belly that he is sexy and in perfect shape. I think there are many, many men walking thinking they are the hotest things on earth, when they have really let themselves go. Why can't they see that they let themselves go? Women tell them they look perfect!

 

My gf tells me I'm fat as soon as I put on 5 pounds , but at least she doesn't seem to mind it.

 

I'd be more than happy to vigilantly stay in shape for her if she does the same. The odds are good - barring any unfortunate rapid fattening, based on the looks of her mother, she will be getting hotter and hotter and hotter with every year, at least until 56:love::love: I'll exhaust myself, but I'll keep up with my hot future (hopefully) wife, no problem (or die trying )

Edited December 10, 2009 by Sam Spade

[White Flower]

Wives seemed to judged pretty strongly according to their weight, wrinkles, age, and so on. What I wonder is, how about the husbands? Do the older wives really get turned on by their aging husbands? If, you took away the wealth, fame, wisdom, etc from an old husband, would he be able to compete with the younger more perfect guy? There seems to be a strong double standard here and I'm curious about the reasons for this.

I think an older guy can compete with a younger one. My ex is 15 years younger than my current boyfriend and my boyfriend has twice the energy and stamina than my ex had. There just is no comparison.

 

I have an idea that may seem off the beaten path on this subject. Men don't change much physically over time except for wrinkles and gray hair. Women change in the same way but after menopause some women don't have the libidos (and the self-lubrication that comes with it) which is a change men don't go through. They may have ED, but that can be helped with the use of meds. It is much more difficult for a woman to get help for her lack of libido. In a nutshell, a younger (looking) woman signifies the idea of hot and available sex whereas an older man does not feel the pressure to look young because sexually speaking he did not change much.

[eeyore1981]

Here's something that amuses me.

 

We are about to celebrate our 25th anniversary. Long time with my H.

 

He is short. He has mentioned being short several times over the years. His friends have mentioned it, and have their little jokes and cutesy names for him when they are kidding around. So it's not like I haven't heard all about it.

 

About 7 years ago, my H was standing next to a guy we both know, and I happened to glance up, and my thought was, "OMG, my H is short!!??" Then I started laughing, because it took me 19 years to notice. Later on, I told him, and he thought I was a nutcase. Other than that one day, I don't see it anymore unless I try really hard, and maybe squint my eyes. To me, he is the right size, and other men are just freakishly tall, lol.

[Sam Spade]

I think an older guy can compete with a younger one. My ex is 15 years younger than my current boyfriend and my boyfriend has twice the energy and stamina than my ex had. There just is no comparison.

 

I have an idea that may seem off the beaten path on this subject. Men don't change much physically over time except for wrinkles and gray hair. Women change in the same way but after menopause some women don't have the libidos (and the self-lubrication that comes with it) which is a change men don't go through. They may have ED, but that can be helped with the use of meds. It is much more difficult for a woman to get help for her lack of libido. In a nutshell, a younger (looking) woman signifies the idea of hot and available sex whereas an older man does not feel the pressure to look young because sexually speaking he did not change much.

 

Also, for the same reason, old women increasingly begin to look like men, which is pretty distressing and surely takes a lot of getting used to:eek:.

[GorillaTheater]

In summary:

- Women don't mind that men aren't rich

- Men have a giant sense of entitlement with regard to the appearance of their women

 

JS - This is why I say you are a male basher. Your posts consistently have this flavor. Women are not flawed - men are flawed.

 

You make a lot of negative comments about how men watch porn, and even those that don't can't be satisfied simply looking at the woman they are with.

 

I have no idea what you look like. And it doesn't matter nearly as much as you think. Two of the hottest women I ever met weren't that pretty from a traditional standpoint. But they sure were smart and fun and confident and they had this vibe that drove a male mad - me included.

 

There are plenty of guys who are not looking for a VS model, not sure where you are meeting men.

 

I truly believe that if you come across in person like you come across on this site, the average man is going to run away from what they perceive to be a giant chip on your shoulder. I don't know how it got their but, that chip is surely more unattractive then ANY physical imperfection you may have.

 

She's been told this in many ways by many different people. Forget it; may as well beat your head against a brick wall for all the impact you'll have.

[GorillaTheater]

Well, beating your head against a brick wall would definitely impact SOMEONE. lol

 

No one can say "all men are this" or "all women are that." It just isn't true. SOME women value money over all else. SOME men value arm candy over all else. Everyone is a mixture of many different good/bad qualities in varying degrees, determined on what YOUR preferences are, and you just have to hope to find one as perfect for YOU as possible.

 

My wife and I, a hopelessly dopey/semi-retarded 21 and 19 when we got married, thoroughly lucked out.

 

As far as the "all men are this" or "all women are that", that's what gets to me. Together with the Martyr's Complex that generally goes along with it, whether it's JS or Woggle. They're old enough to know better.

[angie2443]

Of course my wife tells me I look fantastic. Honesty is only one of her virtues.

 

LOL. Actually, regardless of how you look IRL, you probably do look fantastic to her!

[Jersey Shortie]

Oh Gorilla, I do enjoy how you love to talk about me but never to me.

[mem11363]

GT,

I can't speak for you then - certainly you are neither dopey nor retarded now. I also don't believe it was all luck.

 

As for banging my head against a wall - I agree. I do however believe that the huge advantage to stating "all men/women are...." is that it is a convenient excuse for not being able to sustain a satisfying relationship. You simply get to blame the other person since like ALL men/women they are "...name your flaw..."

 

Me - I LOVE women. Without women, the concept of being a man has no meaning.

 

 

 

My wife and I, a hopelessly dopey/semi-retarded 21 and 19 when we got married, thoroughly lucked out.

 

As far as the "all men are this" or "all women are that", that's what gets to me. Together with the Martyr's Complex that generally goes along with it, whether it's JS or Woggle. They're old enough to know better.

[Jersey Shortie]

No one said "all" in any of their postings. So I personally find it reduntant and misinformed to keep pretending that the word was said to begin with.

[hopeful1980]

You're totally right. It's only women that gain weight and men remain 100% perfect well into their 80s. God what's wrong with us women? Seriously, I'm so sorry you and all the other men out there have to suffer such atrocities. Good thing you and all the other men have porn to turn to with teenagers and 20 year olds with perfect bodies. What else would you do with yourselves? That's what *real* men deserve anyway. Real women should be taken out back and shot whats they no longer fullfill his epitome of physical desire.

 

Isn't it ironic that women are naturally more fatty then men, and prescribed by mother nature, yet we are held to higher standards of fitness then men are? We're not allowed to be what nature intended. Even though men have more muscle and it is physically easier for them to remain in shape then women. Yet it's women that are consistantly critized and put down for their bodies.

 

And I don't think that has anything to do with women telling men "they're" perfect".

 

I read this over and over and I just don't see how it's male bashing. It reads true to me.

[mem11363]

Donna,

Thank you. It is very helpful to have a woman weigh in on this. I think it is a very simple situation. If we took a poll here and asked folks which man bashes women the most and which woman bashes men the most I believe that there would be a very strong consensus.

 

While I DO NOT see life as a popularity contest, I sure would take a hard look in the mirror if a highly diverse group of folks - men and women - selected me as the person who consistently makes the most negative comments about people of the other gender.

 

I feel most of us try to be balanced. I was glad to see the males on the board join the women and HAMMER Woggle last week because we ALL thought what he was doing to his wife was an utter disgrace. And we all pounded on him for his ludicrous and negative generalizations about females.

 

 

 

As much as you bash men in your posts, JS, it comes across that way. Even to many women, me included.

 

I'm not saying there AREN'T men as you described, but I truly feel they are fewer than you think.

[mem11363]

Comment below is clearly male bashing. Not the first or second or ... comment of this type by this poster.

 

 

 

Most men aren't rich. Most women don't mind. Most men think they deserve Victoria Secret models because that's what that big shiney moving picture attached to their wall told them.