Proposal time?

[slowandsteady]

Hi all. I've been in a serious relationship for over a year and I'm wondering if any one here has any advice on how to propose.

 

How do you do it tastefully but still make it unique/special? Are there any big no-nos?

 

I know this is a pretty personal thing, but I figure at the very least I can compile a nice list of what NOT to do.

 

Thank you so much!

[Lauriebell82]

When my fiance proposed after I said yes I held out my left hand so he could put the ring on and he asked "oh, is that the hand it goes on?" You might not want to do that! (it was funny and endearing though) He told me later he was so nervous that he doesn't even remember saying that!

 

Find a place that is special to both of you. I would say it doesn't have to be some crazy creative proposal, just get down on one knee, tell her you love her, and propose. My fiance isn't big on huge speeches, I don't know if you are or not. It was still very romantic and sweet despite not having speech prepared.

[bluewolf17]

Google proposal ideas! You will find a lot.

 

I had a very sweet male friend do this for his fiance:

 

He bought twelve long stem red roses. On each rose, he attached a little note (about the size of a matchbook) with a piece of twine to the rose strem. Each note said "I love you because..." and he would write on each rose, why he loved her so much. She read them all, then he gave her one pink rose that had a card on it. It said "will you marry me?" After she read it, he dropped to a knee and brought out the ring.

 

Everytime he or she tells that story I just cry. Its so sweet and thoughtful. But you should make the proposal about your and your lady. Personalize it. It doesn't have to be a big prodcution. I find the most romantic proposals, always include the man telling her WHY he wants to marry her.

 

Good luck!

Edited December 9, 2009 by bluewolf17
spelling

[slowandsteady]

Thank you all for your thoughtful responses. i like the tip about coming up with a creative and personalized way of letting her know why I love her. it makes perfect sense, but I could see myself totally overlooking it in the heat of the moment. (and red roses are definitely a no-go since she hates them)

 

I'm not much of a speech maker or anything like that. Do you think it's better to have something prepared or to just improvise? I don't want it to look like I haven't put any thought into it, but I also don't want it to sound too prepared/formal.

 

I actually have a question about the whole going down on one knee thing. Is that still pretty common or is it considered old fashioned/corny? I don't have any problem with doing it, but I want to make sure I don't make myself look too silly. How would I know if that's something my girlfriend would be into or not?

[Lauriebell82]

Thank you all for your thoughtful responses. i like the tip about coming up with a creative and personalized way of letting her know why I love her. it makes perfect sense, but I could see myself totally overlooking it in the heat of the moment. (and red roses are definitely a no-go since she hates them)

 

I'm not much of a speech maker or anything like that. Do you think it's better to have something prepared or to just improvise? I don't want it to look like I haven't put any thought into it, but I also don't want it to sound too prepared/formal.

 

I actually have a question about the whole going down on one knee thing. Is that still pretty common or is it considered old fashioned/corny? I don't have any problem with doing it, but I want to make sure I don't make myself look too silly. How would I know if that's something my girlfriend would be into or not?

 

Get down on one knee!!!!!! No girl can resist that!

 

Also, as I said before my fiance is not a speech maker either. I loved the proposal, the lack of speech and all. All you really have to say is that you love her and ask her to marry you. It sounds to me like you just want it to be a simple and traditional proposal. Thats fine! That's what mine was like and it was PERFECT. I wouldn't have had it any other way!!! I also wouldn't have wanted my fiance to propose in a way that "wasn't him." It should be special for both of you!

[Citizen Erased]

I actually have a question about the whole going down on one knee thing. Is that still pretty common or is it considered old fashioned/corny? I don't have any problem with doing it, but I want to make sure I don't make myself look too silly. How would I know if that's something my girlfriend would be into or not?

Most romantic things are not for me, I find a lot of it silly nonsense. But that would make me melt.

[Rollercoasterr]

Well, when Mathew proposed he had wanted to take me for a walk by a nearby lake and propose that way(there was some things said about maybe writing it on the ground, but I'm not sure since it didn't happen! ), but instead it was pouring the rain. So we sat by the lake in his car and just spent quality time together. When he did it we were kissing and he got so nervous he fumbled the box out of his pocket and said "So you want to marry me?". I, of course, said yes and went back to kissing him. He turned my head with his hand to face the ring and said "No, really. Do you want to marry me?".

 

I know this isn't the proposal he wanted. And I know that he was nervous as hell, but that was the sweetest thing I've experienced. I love the flashy words and the professions of love, but the fact of the matter is that at that moment I didn't care. This amazing man was so nervous over asking ME to marry him. All I kept thinking was "I make him nervous? Me? Am I that special to him?". And then I looked into his eyes and knew everything he wanted to say but couldn't. This was truly a beautiful moment for me.

 

It's not about the words and the way you do it so much as doing it with FEELING. Don't propose to her on a bad day at work or school. Spend all day thinking about her and the little things she does that makes you go wild. Imagine your life, your kids, your house, anything that can put you in that lovable cuddly mood that girls love. And then do it. Girls love nothing more than when they can FEEL that they are loved. It means so much more than when we are told.

 

Good luck!

[slowandsteady]

Well, when Mathew proposed he had wanted to take me for a walk by a nearby lake and propose that way(there was some things said about maybe writing it on the ground, but I'm not sure since it didn't happen! ), but instead it was pouring the rain. So we sat by the lake in his car and just spent quality time together. When he did it we were kissing and he got so nervous he fumbled the box out of his pocket and said "So you want to marry me?". I, of course, said yes and went back to kissing him. He turned my head with his hand to face the ring and said "No, really. Do you want to marry me?".

 

I know this isn't the proposal he wanted. And I know that he was nervous as hell, but that was the sweetest thing I've experienced. I love the flashy words and the professions of love, but the fact of the matter is that at that moment I didn't care. This amazing man was so nervous over asking ME to marry him. All I kept thinking was "I make him nervous? Me? Am I that special to him?". And then I looked into his eyes and knew everything he wanted to say but couldn't. This was truly a beautiful moment for me.

 

It's not about the words and the way you do it so much as doing it with FEELING. Don't propose to her on a bad day at work or school. Spend all day thinking about her and the little things she does that makes you go wild. Imagine your life, your kids, your house, anything that can put you in that lovable cuddly mood that girls love. And then do it. Girls love nothing more than when they can FEEL that they are loved. It means so much more than when we are told.

 

Good luck!

 

 

That's a really beautiful story and makes me want to go propose right now! Unfortunately I don't have the ring yet, so I guess it'll have to wait Well it sounds like I just need to be myself, let her know how much I love her, get down on my knee, and do the deed! Anything else major I'm missing?

 

Oh yeah...and check the weather forecast!

 

Which leads me to another question...indoors or outdoors? And how do you pick the day to do it? was there any reason why he picked that day out of all the others or was it just a complete surprise?

[Rollercoasterr]

We are and have always been LDR in our relationship. He came down here on Feb. 27th for our Valentines visit, and the 28th was a Saturday so we planned and went on our Valentines date. Prior to that we hadn't seen each other since December. It was a completely surprise to me, though. We had loosely talked about married, but he's the type that wants to finish school so he can take care of me. He's graduating in April and we're getting married in June!

 

I wouldn't have cared where the location was, but I would recommend doing something from the heart. If she likes walks by the lake, do that. If she likes sitting at home cuddled up to you on the couch, that could be special too.

 

Or for a christmas surprise you could tie a ribbon around a box and hang it on the tree like an ornament. Then you could ask her to see what that is hanging on the tree because you don't remember seeing it before. Imagine her surprise!!!

 

I know you said you don't have the ring yet, I'm just giving ideas.

[misternoname]

Here's what I did and it turned out awesome...

 

My girlfriend and I met for the first time at a local restaurant just for drinks (we had met on match.com).

 

In the middle of the week, no special day, I suggested to her that i was craving the place we met (we seldom go there). She said fine.

 

I had talked to the manager earlier and made sure the same table was reserved for us.

 

Very nonchalantly ordered and just stayed very casual. After a bit I looked at her and said with a surprised look on my face "do you realize this is the table we sat at when we first met? How ironic! Wow, two years ago we sat right here as total strangers. I never thought that night that I would fall madly in love with you" etc, etc.

 

She agreed, thought it was sweet and funny. I then reached under the table, pulled out the ring, got down on one knee and proposed.

 

She cried...waitstaff cheered, patrons cheered...everything went perfect.

 

I guess my point is that you don't need to be in a hot air balloon or standing on the balcony of the Eifel tower to make your proposal romantic. To this day she tells how sweet my proposal was.

 

We're getting married in April :-)

[insecureeeyep]

Here's what I did and it turned out awesome...

 

My girlfriend and I met for the first time at a local restaurant just for drinks (we had met on match.com).

 

In the middle of the week, no special day, I suggested to her that i was craving the place we met (we seldom go there). She said fine.

 

I had talked to the manager earlier and made sure the same table was reserved for us.

 

Very nonchalantly ordered and just stayed very casual. After a bit I looked at her and said with a surprised look on my face "do you realize this is the table we sat at when we first met? How ironic! Wow, two years ago we sat right here as total strangers. I never thought that night that I would fall madly in love with you" etc, etc.

 

She agreed, thought it was sweet and funny. I then reached under the table, pulled out the ring, got down on one knee and proposed.

 

She cried...waitstaff cheered, patrons cheered...everything went perfect.

 

I guess my point is that you don't need to be in a hot air balloon or standing on the balcony of the Eifel tower to make your proposal romantic. To this day she tells how sweet my proposal was.

 

We're getting married in April :-)

 

Out of all the stories on here this one was my favorite. ^_^ Congrats

[maimae]

take her to a romantic place somewhere both of you have not been then kneel down in front of her and propose with a ring in your hand.

[Mr White]

First, just a bit over a year seems a bit too soon for my taste.

Second, forget about all the tacky proposal ideas. Just take the girl to a nice dinner and then confidently whip out the ring:).

[Mr White]

Here's what I did and it turned out awesome...

 

My girlfriend and I met for the first time at a local restaurant just for drinks (we had met on match.com).

 

In the middle of the week, no special day, I suggested to her that i was craving the place we met (we seldom go there). She said fine.

 

I had talked to the manager earlier and made sure the same table was reserved for us.

 

Very nonchalantly ordered and just stayed very casual. After a bit I looked at her and said with a surprised look on my face "do you realize this is the table we sat at when we first met? How ironic! Wow, two years ago we sat right here as total strangers. I never thought that night that I would fall madly in love with you" etc, etc.

 

She agreed, thought it was sweet and funny. I then reached under the table, pulled out the ring, got down on one knee and proposed.

 

She cried...waitstaff cheered, patrons cheered...everything went perfect.

 

I guess my point is that you don't need to be in a hot air balloon or standing on the balcony of the Eifel tower to make your proposal romantic. To this day she tells how sweet my proposal was.

 

We're getting married in April :-)

 

That's how it's done, old school.

[georgia girl]

My fiancee and I went away for a weekend. Not totally a big deal because we do that to get away from our jobs, but he suggested going to this place that we had been to and had our best vacation ever. The weather isn't exactly beach weather, but it was time to get away (or so he said) and I agreed.

 

We left after work and he was very quiet the entire drive down. The next morning, we went for a walk on the beach in sweatshirts and coffee and it was miserably cold! But, he has insisted and it sounded romantic. He's also not a speech maker, so he stopped me. Dropped down on one knee and literally said, "I don't know the right way to say this but I love you. Will you marry me?"

 

Not the most romantic story in the world but it warmed my heart immensely. The biggest part? DROP DOWN ON ONE KNEE!!!! That's what we've been waiting for all of our life!

[bigcsw]

What I did was make a scrapbook with things from our time dating. You could also do a photo album. We then went on a cruise and I gave her the scrapbook and got down on one knee on our balcony.

 

I think the scrapbook was the deal closer

[georgia girl]

You made a scrapbook? You totally rock! My fiancee would have been covered in glue and tiny bits of paper with a beer at one elbow and a pair of scissors and hacked up photos on the other end. I am impressed!

 

Congratulations!

[greatgirlfriend]

Nice stories. So when did you all know the other was the "one"? Right away or did you fight it and it happened?

[Rollercoasterr]

Nice stories. So when did you all know the other was the "one"? Right away or did you fight it and it happened?

 

 

Right away. I knew the second I laid eyes on him. But we're LDR, so we had been together for a bit before we saw each other for the first time.

 

But it was like electricity. I still feel it every time I see him. I just get this overwhelming sense of calm and I just know that he's the one.

[slowandsteady]

I love all your stories...the scrapbooking idea is really cool. And it definitely sounds like down on one knee is a given.

 

So I am wondering what your opinions/advice are for the ring itself. I'm personally all about getting something really nice because I think it is such an important symbol and because it will be worn her whole life.

 

So far I've heard pretty much nothing but good things about platinum. Supposedly it's extremely durable and holds up well to long term wear. Would you say that's the best choice for a white metal? What kind of ring did you get?

[slowandsteady]

Nice stories. So when did you all know the other was the "one"? Right away or did you fight it and it happened?

 

I don't know if there was one defining moment...every passing day just feels more and more right.

[georgia girl]

We're a little bit older so I'm a little more practical. I picked out a solitare (I know, traditional) and a white gold setting. While I will have it for the rest of my life, I also wanted it to be something that fit in with our lifestyle and not force us to rethink other financial decisions just for a ring.

 

From a woman's perspective, I would get an idea of what she likes. As I posted, my fiance set me up. You may not want to do that, but you can ask her friends or family.

 

And when did I know? I guess it was on our first vacation together. He was the first couple-only trip I had ever taken. When we got through that vacation and we still liked each other, it was all good!