Mary3 Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 Why are women so keen on getting married but then the man does marry her and he wants to commit she does a 180 and all of a sudden wants a divorce a few years later? Men see the high divorce which is mainly driven by women and it scares them. Men actually do want to get married but they are scared of ending up with a walkaway wife. Just look at some of the posts on this board to see what men are so afraid of. What guarantee is there for ANY marriage ? Any wife can walk.....if you beat her , you cheat on her , you do any psycho babble stuff like mysoginist garbage...There is no promise for anyone getting married. The best thing is for most to stay SINGLE like many of the male posters here have suggested. Then you don't risk your wallet , your mind or your freedom. I am neutral on the fence about marriage. I can leave it . Or I can leave it. Glad I am single Link to post Share on other sites
sedgwick Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 ISo why do the women...stay around with status quo instead of actually leaving and maybe giving him a wake up call? Perhaps because, contrary to the Sex and the City paradigm, not all women need a ceremony and a piece of paper to prove their love is real? Men see the high divorce which is mainly driven by women Can you point me to the accurate, scientific study which proves that? Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 Men see the high divorce which is mainly driven by women Actually I have read articles which state " Most women initiate divorce proceedings " If I can find that article. I will post here... Link to post Share on other sites
sedgwick Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Men see the high divorce which is mainly driven by women Actually I have read articles which state " Most women initiate divorce proceedings " If I can find that article. I will post here... I've read lots of articles that state lots of things. I'm interested, however, in an infallible study that definitively PROVES this. Forgive me, but it seems a wee bit like another LS generalization... Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Statistically women initiate the overwhelming majority of divorces. This is a statistical face and look around you. The high divorce rate is mainly being driven by women. Link to post Share on other sites
sedgwick Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 (edited) Statistically women initiate the overwhelming majority of divorces. This is a statistical face and look around you. The high divorce rate is mainly being driven by women. Again, I ask for the results of a study that definitively proves this. I don't really understand what "this is a statistical face and look around you" means. Does "face" mean "fact?" As for "look around you," I can look around me and see lots of things. The person standing beside me can look around and see entirely different things. I'm sure you understand why I'm interested in the absolute proof for which I previously asked. Thanks! Edited January 23, 2010 by sedgwick Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 I've read lots of articles that state lots of things. I'm interested, however, in an infallible study that definitively PROVES this. Forgive me, but it seems a wee bit like another LS generalization... I understand your need to know the statistical aspect of this statement. I will see what I can find.. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 (edited) Divorce Myth 10: It is usually men who initiate divorce proceedings. Fact: Two-thirds of all divorces are initiated by women. One recent study found that many of the reasons for this have to do with the nature of our divorce laws. For example, in most states women have a good chance of receiving custody of their children. Because women more strongly want to keep their children with them, in states where there is a presumption of shared custody with the husband the percentage of women who initiate divorces is much lower. Also, the higher rate of women initiators is probably due to the fact that men are more likely to be "badly behaved." Husbands, for example, are more likely than wives to have problems with drinking, drug abuse, and infidelity. Edited January 23, 2010 by Mary3 Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Women drink, do drugs and cheat just as much as men do. If you want to believe that women don't have drinking problems go to any bar on the boardwalk during the summertime. Link to post Share on other sites
sedgwick Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 One recent study found that many of the reasons for this have to do with the nature of our divorce laws. What is the study, and who were the researchers? And does that pertain to divorces around the world, or those governed by the laws of one country? Forgive me, I just get tired of things thrown out on LS as "facts" when they aren't actually facts at all. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 What is the study, and who were the researchers? And does that pertain to divorces around the world, or those governed by the laws of one country? Forgive me, I just get tired of things thrown out on LS as "facts" when they aren't actually facts at all.[/quote I did what I could.. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Women drink, do drugs and cheat just as much as men do. If you want to believe that women don't have drinking problems go to any bar on the boardwalk during the summertime. I know FAR more men who cheat use drugs and drink.... Link to post Share on other sites
Golfilla Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 I'm just wondering...a lot of women are upset when their SO wont propose after several years, have kids or "move to the next step," but in some cases there seem to be signs that the guy was never willing to marry. So why do the women continue to hope that he'll change? why do they stay around with status quo instead of actually leaving and maybe giving him a wake up call? Probably because they realise that these days you can do all the things you can do in a marriage without actually being in a marriage. You can have a great relationship, you can stay together forever, you can have joint bank accounts, you can have kids, you can give your partner 50% of your assets and so on. If you already have a great relationship, why do you need to sign a contract giving the government a say in it? Link to post Share on other sites
infjgrl Posted February 2, 2010 Share Posted February 2, 2010 i definitely can understand why (some) men don't want to get married these days... to them, there isn't much difference. but aren't there some guys out there who want to make that commitment? i'm not sure why i feel this way... but i would be completely humbled by the idea of someone i loved wanting to spend the rest of their lives with me and only me. that's why i like marriage. yes, i can have everything without the piece of paper, but that extra level of commitment is in a whole other league. make sense? Link to post Share on other sites
pureinheart Posted February 2, 2010 Share Posted February 2, 2010 Perhaps they'd grasp it if men explained that clearly? Or explained it before moving in together or getting into a long term relationship with a woman who clearly does want marriage for her future? Or explained it before they have children with them, which some men do, yet still keep talking about "one day" in the future for marriage? I agree with you completely. One of the cruelist things men do is hide the fact they don't want to marry. They string women along, letting them believe that "one day" they'll change their minds. It is a horrible, hurtful thing to do. This is a wonderful thread by the way...Both of you are soo right and it's interesting that I caught sight of this thread because was on the phone with SO and he made a comment inferring the total lack of desire for M (my wording, not the actual conversation). I am not ready right now, although I don't want a man who doesnot consider it. I called him back because I like to know where things stand, and asked him where he was at concerning this issue....he side stepped and danced danced around my question (as usual), complained that I was trying to start a fight (his typical mind game ...lol)...so I told him that based on his response, or lack of, that I will consider seeing other people when the time is right for me. What I am about to say is me insinuating, or in any way saying I am better than or less than, it is just what I choose to do....I will not live with a man, have sex with them, nothing till M...that is just what I want. Link to post Share on other sites
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