At the end?

[mommy2kiera]

Hi Guys!

 

Sorry to come here and complain but I am hoping I can get some good advice.

 

My husband and I are on the verge of seperating, or maybe in his eyes we already are. We have been married almost 3 years and have an almost 2 year old daughter. Our relationship has been kinda rocky to say the least mostly due to his crazy adoptive mother. He was adopted when he was 13 and his mom is a psycho. When I say psycho let me just give you an example. A few weeks ago she posted a story on Facebook for everyone to see that my husband begged her to adopt him but everyone thought he was gay because he knew how to make a pot holder. He got a little upset that she would post that and asked her to remove it. She flew mad and told him his life wasn't that important to people and that people made fun of him but she didn't.

Anyway, my husband and I have been in marriage counseling trying to work out some of our issues for the past few months. We argue quite a bit because he won't show any kind of affection, he always makes plans without thinking about me or what I may have planned, and he puts everyone before me. If we have a discussion where someone else comes up he always takes there side and I feel like in a marriage you put your wife first. There is always something before me, whether it be work, his mom, or even his friends.

I do have problems with mood swings and probably should have been on some kind of anti-depressant but with a child, working 40+ hours a week, and going to school there is not enough hours in the day to take time out for myself.

 

So you are wondering why I am rambling on. Last week I had had enough of his moms crap, she does nothing but trash me and my family but my husband thinks she walks on water and does no wrong. I knew she had been telling everyone crap about me so I KNOW this is wrong and is so embarassing for me to admit but I knew her email password and logged on her email account and forwarded my husband an email where she was telling her biological daughter that my H was worthless. Looking back it makes me look terrible but at that point I was at my wits end with her crap. She knows it was me who forwarded the message. Anyway, so my husband flips out on me and wants it over. We have been back and forth like this before and usually after a day or two after he has calmed down we go back to normal. About three months ago he was dead set on leaving and we decided we would try counseling. Everything was going okay for a while, we still had our ups and downs. We argued quite a bit still but were getting a long more(in my eyes anyway). Well after all this happened he told me he wasn't happy, he didn't love me and hadn't been happy for a while. I asked him how long has he been unhappy and he tells me for about a week. I asked when was it he decided it was over, he told me today(the day of the email). I know he has every right to be mad but in my eyes I was only trying to get him to see what she was really doing. He tells her everything and she turns around and flips things around and tells everyone everything about us.

At first I thought he was just angry, but he really does seem like he wants it over. He is still staying at the house, he says he can't afford to leave right now. We are waiting until after Christmas to tell everyone we are split up. He really seems serious this time. We usually talk on and off during the day, which we still do but he no longer tells me he loves me. He has told me over and over again that he is done. But last night, I guess he let it slip and I got the impression that he wants me to beg. He said, "I am not promising anything but I have done nothing but change for you and if you want this to work it's your turn to do all the convincing to me." For the past few days he has went back and forth with at first he said he would leave and we would work on it with him living elsewhere. He then said nevermind he didn't want to work things out. Then it was what he said last night with the I have had to do all the changing its your turn thing.

What kills me is he calls and talks to me like nothing is wrong. I know this has kinda been all over the place but my mind is going crazy right now.