questions for all the bad boys out there (cmon, you know who you are!)

[yes]

so, monsieurs bad boys, why is it that you find it so hard to committ to one lady? why do you jump from woman to woman for years on end, often your whole life, often even once married? can most of you be tamed? do you WANT to be tamed? do you screw around because you feel you haven't found "the one", or you want to do just that - screw around, not looking for anything deeper? anything else you'd like to share?

 

i understand that when guys start out, all they wanna do is have sex and explore - fine by me. but when they keep on screwing around for years on end, - it puzzles me. don't you want a life-partner?...

 

-yes

[Tony T]

There are a number of reasons men jump from woman to woman. One is fear of commitment. One is fear of abandonment...for them it's easier to make relationships short and sweet than it is to chance being hurt. Another is immaturity...just not being ready. Just because a man skips around from woman to woman doesn't make him a bad boy, unless he's deceiving these ladies. I'd say that most of these men would give anything to have one great relationship if they could get over the psychological dynamics that keep them from doing so.

[jenny]

a related question for saviours of bad boys:

 

really, most people can assess character pretty quickly. why would any woman attempt to lasso the bad boy for committment? there is no point. why live a life trying to change people instead of just appreciating them?

 

i have no idea why women torture themselves over so called bad boys. not everybody wants the american white-fenced and double-knit life; we assume that is the natural default choice, but it is not.

[yes]

Just because a man skips around from woman to woman doesn't make him a bad boy, unless he's deceiving these ladies.

----------------

 

In my experience, these men don't deceive directly, but they send ambiguous signals - those that an interested woman is likely to interpret as genuine interest, yet nothing's been directly said, so they cannot be blamed. Doesn't really matter if one calls them bad or not though, I guess.

 

 

I'd say that most of these men would give anything to have one great relationship if they could get over the psychological dynamics that keep them from doing so.

----------------

 

Yeah, many seem to realize they're being idiots, but can't help it...

 

 

why live a life trying to change people instead of just appreciating them?

---------------

 

good question =) i guess a part of it the challenge of lasso-ing a bad boy (i.e. nobody could tame him, but i did! kind of feeling). another part is that bad boys have had more experience w/ women and just know how to treat women smoothly, which is enjoyable. yet another part is that the bad boys seem to have more drive for life than other men - they give off that festive feeling of constant pursuit and excitement. i'm sure there're many more reasons they're attractive ... like perhaps some women are also afraid of committment.

 

-yes

[UCFKevin]

Jenny, HELL of a question.

 

Do some women seriously think to themselves, "Oooh...I'm gonna tame this one!" ?

[yes]

i doubt women think of it as taming. they think of it as - he'll fall for me and that will overpower his desire to screw around.

 

-yes

[UCFKevin]

Well, that's what I mean.

 

So women actually think that? Some of them? Sometimes?

[yes]

yes, they do. i mean we do. is that such a ridiculous thing to think?

 

-yes

[CostumeSmile]

Do some women seriously think to themselves, "Oooh...I'm gonna tame this one!" ?

Not only do we think it but we do it!

 

I know plenty of guys that have been TAMED! My brother was one of them....lol.....many props to his wife!

[moimeme]

why would any woman attempt to lasso the bad boy for committment

 

Ask Annette Benning.

 

 

 

Mind you, she can have him

 

 

Do some women seriously think to themselves, "Oooh...I'm gonna tame this one!" ?

 

Do some men seriously think to themselves "Oooh - she's not interested at all; I'm going to change HER mind"?

 

Is the Pope Polish?

[CostumeSmile]

why would any woman attempt to lasso the bad boy for committment

 

Well in my bro's case, a young handsome young man with lots to offer, he didn't want to settle with the wrong girl so in the meanwhile he played the field and had fun....then along came his future wife, she put him in his place and now he is a wonderful husband. Total change on his part, my whole fam. was like whoa....

[CostumeSmile]

Do some men seriously think to themselves "Oooh - she's not interested at all; I'm going to change HER mind"?

Good one Moimeme.... :lmao:

 

God knows men think that more often than women think about taming....LOL

[hurtinrealbad]

I would say ask Pamela Anderson this question. She probably has the best insight of anyone....

[Vivid_29]

Ok Yes - In regards to your question, some of these badguys can be tamed. My ex is a young, little girl, and has always chased the badguy. While in college, this girl pursued me for a couple of months and I found her so annoying, at first, but somehow, I fell for her, hard!

 

Just have the right attitude and we'll be wanting you, just as bad!

 

I can't speak for everyone, but I go through phases. Bad - not so bad - and then bad again. I guess it depends on the character of the woman.

 

We are always up for a challenge. Don't chase us; make us come to you! If we do not want you, brush it off and move onto the next. You have this type of attitude, you'll be that much more desireable! Show us a firm hand and don't act sappy and gay. Some of us will take advantage of that and walk all over you.

 

Oh by the way, I give advice to counter us guys, but for goodness sake, don't use it on me!

 

~V

[Vivid_29]

Originally posted by moimeme

why would any woman attempt to lasso the bad boy for committment

Mind you, she can have him

 

Don't act like that, Moi. I'm sure that deep down, you adore us!

 

~V

[Vivid_29]

Originally posted by CostumeSmile

Well in my bro's case, a young handsome young man with lots to offer, he didn't want to settle with the wrong girl so in the meanwhile he played the field and had fun....then along came his future wife, she put him in his place and now he is a wonderful husband. Total change on his part, my whole fam. was like whoa....

 

Exactly - See, yes? We can be butterfly boys and jump around from flower to flower, but there are exceptions -- The one confident, cockyass, I don't give a f**k, type of gal. These women are the ones I'm attracted to. Remember, in my book, attitude is everything!!!

 

~V

 

Oh, by the way - Costume gal - You are a sexy mami chula!

[yes]

Got it! I think! Heh heh.

 

We are always up for a challenge. Don't chase us; make us come to you! If we do not want you, brush it off and move onto the next. You have this type of attitude, you'll be that much more desireable! Show us a firm hand and don't act sappy and gay. Some of us will take advantage of that and walk all over you.

--------------

 

Brilliant advice, thanks.

 

 

I guess what I've been thinking is that no matter how well you understand human psych and all that, you're never in full control of who you fall for - and in a way, this is great - i mean it creates hurt and pain a lotta times, but if everything was so ruled out & rational and there was proper "love training", that'd suck! you can use your understanding of psychology to find somebody with whom you're compatible and get them to stay with you, but no knowledge can make you go crazy for someone or make them go crazy for you, right?...

 

-yes

 

PS Any idea how to get oil paint off human skin??

[yogi-mon]

The bad boy wants a girlfriend, hes just really picky.

and gets bored easily. Ussually he doesnt give a ****, this makes him unnattainable.

But with the right woman, he drops his shield, and - when he does that - the bad boy

becomes a baby.

 

But every time he gets hurt, he becomes even more difficult to break into.

So dont hurt your bad boy if he drops his shield!!

(or you'll get hurt by him again in a more devastating form)

 

They are the borg. They become stronger with every identified weakness.

You cannot beat the bad boy. Only love him

[yes]

OK, so some women do "change" the bad boys! Good. Cuz i don't want a good boy - i mean i want a bad boy turned good

 

 

So it seems that the take-home message is:

 

some men stop screwing around, some don't. act like you don't give a damn.

 

sounds like a plan,

-yes

[Vivid_29]

Originally posted by yes

OK, so some women do "change" the bad boys! Good. Cuz i don't want a good boy - i mean i want a bad boy turned good

-yes

 

You say this now, but once he turns good, you'll probably kick his a$$ to the curb!

 

You ladies will chase what you can't have, and when you finally do get it, you won't want it!

 

Yes - You will grow out of that bad boy phase, when you get older. Right now, you are still young and want a little excitement in your life. In time, that will all change! Just keep the badguys as a f**k buddy or a really good friend. We have our fun; why can't you?

 

~V

[yes]

you opened a whole other can of worms!

 

Just keep the badguys as a f**k buddy or a really good friend. We have our fun; why can't you?

--------------------

 

Why can't we? -> because the society tells us - bad boys screw around and then find virgins to marry. I'm exaggerating, but you get the idea, right?

 

-yes

[moimeme]

PS Any idea how to get oil paint off human skin??

 

Wash with Varsol. Or turpentine. Then you'll have to use lots of soap and water and lotion because that junk is rough on the skin. Or you can get some Snap - if they still make it.

[Vivid_29]

Originally posted by yes

you opened a whole other can of worms!

 

Why can't we? -> because the society tells us - bad boys screw around and then find virgins to marry. I'm exaggerating, but you get the idea, right?

 

-yes

 

True, true, I see your point. I tend to lean towards the good girls. I still like the badgirls, though!

 

Come on, girl - Use us and then kick us to the curb. Get some b@lls and stand up to us, stand your ground. Flip the script a little!!!

 

One of my previous ex's was a complete doormat!!! I used to break her a$$ down. Now, I'm so lusting after her and she toys with me, all the time. It drives me nuts, but I like it!

 

Although I have to much pride to give in and act sappy and gay, I must say that I make myself available to her advances and am praying that one day, she'll give me that something, that I can't get enough of!!!

 

~Vivid

[moimeme]

Don't act like that, Moi. I'm sure that deep down, you adore us!

 

Sorry to burst your bubble, babe, but actually no. Never saw the charm in Warren Beatty or Burt Reynolds or Julio Iglesias - all notorious BBs. Or whatsisname now - the smoking swearing guy who got his gf pregnant and is all the rage. Men like that bore me to tears. What's worst is they think they are such hot stuff! BLECH!! People who fancy themselves playboys are not even slightly attractive; they're too impressed with themselves.

 

There's no compliment to me that someone like that wants to sleep with me; clearly he's not discriminating. I've no interest in being just another one of the long line of available orifices. Maybe, were he to fall madly-head-over-heels in love I might consider a relationship - but it would take a long time to convince me that the professed love was real and not just a ploy to get me into the sack.

[yogi-mon]

Doesnt work like that.

 

Because if you are a f**k buddy, then he doesnt give a crap about you,

hence you want him.

 

Sorry bout that, but badboys dont care about **** buddies, so that

wont work for ya.

 

But the girls who are a badboys toy inevitably do care.

Hence the catch 22. Good boys make good **** buddies though.

cause the ladies dont care about the good boy, and use him for sex!

 

The mirror.