Are they boring, or am I expecting too much?

[Leonard]

Hello everyone, I've just landed in the tropical paradise of Malaysia for my Christmas holiday. Happy belated Christmas!

 

I've just caught up with the pages of reply I've received. They are generally unprovokingly hostile, and it's perhaps people are getting a little defensive, which I think I can understand a bit. It's all cool here, lighten up

There's no need for the personal offenses and derailing the thread. I am accepting genuine advice and critiques from the few posters who were kind enough to give them to me.

 

Perhaps I wasn't specific in my first post, so I'll simplify it. I am not beating my chest saying that my achievements validate me for being better than anyone else.

What I am saying is that I have a lot of interesting life experiences I can share with people and make interesting conversations. They don't have to be about my life experiences at all, I can just be funny, and carry and lead the room around me.

The problem I'm experiencing is that I feel that people, specifically women are not putting as much effort as I am into holding an interesting conversation.

 

Yes, I'm familiar with flirting, and yes I've had some nice ladies hit on me, but I politely turn them down because I feel the encounter was simply one sided.

If I'm looking for a one night stand, I could have easily done so, but I have my own personal/moral boundaries with the topic of casual relationships. So to make it clear, that although I like sex, it is not the #1 driving force behind me looking for a relationship.

 

Anyway, have fun with the discussion and happy holidays

[threebyfate]

Leonard, look up the definition of a Renaissance man. He's well-rounded, thus capable of talking about all kinds of topics, rather than just a narrow scope of personal interests.

[Phateless]

Hello everyone, I've just landed in the tropical paradise of Malaysia for my Christmas holiday. Happy belated Christmas!

 

I've just caught up with the pages of reply I've received. They are generally unprovokingly hostile, and it's perhaps people are getting a little defensive, which I think I can understand a bit. It's all cool here, lighten up

There's no need for the personal offenses and derailing the thread. I am accepting genuine advice and critiques from the few posters who were kind enough to give them to me.

 

Perhaps I wasn't specific in my first post, so I'll simplify it. I am not beating my chest saying that my achievements validate me for being better than anyone else.

What I am saying is that I have a lot of interesting life experiences I can share with people and make interesting conversations. They don't have to be about my life experiences at all, I can just be funny, and carry and lead the room around me.

The problem I'm experiencing is that I feel that people, specifically women are not putting as much effort as I am into holding an interesting conversation.

 

Yes, I'm familiar with flirting, and yes I've had some nice ladies hit on me, but I politely turn them down because I feel the encounter was simply one sided.

If I'm looking for a one night stand, I could have easily done so, but I have my own personal/moral boundaries with the topic of casual relationships. So to make it clear, that although I like sex, it is not the #1 driving force behind me looking for a relationship.

 

Anyway, have fun with the discussion and happy holidays

 

My original question still stands. Where have you gone and what are you doing to SEEK OUT women you think will be interesting to you?

[ordinary_girl]

Hello everyone, I've just landed in the tropical paradise of Malaysia for my Christmas holiday. Happy belated Christmas!

 

I've just caught up with the pages of reply I've received. They are generally unprovokingly hostile, and it's perhaps people are getting a little defensive, which I think I can understand a bit. It's all cool here, lighten up

There's no need for the personal offenses and derailing the thread. I am accepting genuine advice and critiques from the few posters who were kind enough to give them to me.

 

Perhaps I wasn't specific in my first post, so I'll simplify it. I am not beating my chest saying that my achievements validate me for being better than anyone else.

What I am saying is that I have a lot of interesting life experiences I can share with people and make interesting conversations. They don't have to be about my life experiences at all, I can just be funny, and carry and lead the room around me.

The problem I'm experiencing is that I feel that people, specifically women are not putting as much effort as I am into holding an interesting conversation.

 

Yes, I'm familiar with flirting, and yes I've had some nice ladies hit on me, but I politely turn them down because I feel the encounter was simply one sided.

If I'm looking for a one night stand, I could have easily done so, but I have my own personal/moral boundaries with the topic of casual relationships. So to make it clear, that although I like sex, it is not the #1 driving force behind me looking for a relationship.

 

Anyway, have fun with the discussion and happy holidays

 

date older women

[randall]

Most people are boring if they don't have the same interests as you. In your case it seems your interests are focused on your image, basically things that you think will make you look and sound good. This isn't a personal attack, I've met a lot of asians who are image obssessed, but having that kind of personality isn't very interesting for others.

 

I'm guessing part of the reason other people seem boring to you is because they are bored around you. It's very hard for people to be interesting when the person they are with doesn't interest them. In particular, if *everyone* you meet seems boring then the problem likely lies with you.

[Phateless]

My original question still stands. Where have you gone and what are you doing to SEEK OUT women you think will be interesting to you?

 

I'm still waiting for an answer.

[Awesome Username]

I don't think it's wrong to put up your accomplishments in regards to wanting the same idea from a potential partner. It certainly isn't everything, but it does count a great deal.

 

I find that when I hang out with guys, a lot of the first time I meet them involves them telling me about their accomplishments. A lot of guys sort of do this "Job Interview" thing where they put on the table, "This what I have. Am I adequate as a dude? Do you do this stuff too?" I also find most often that they are not as interested in whether or not I've done similar/better stuff, but if I'm impressed and if I think they rule. Sometimes if I discuss accomplishments with a guy, they feel like I'm trying to one up them (if mine are cool in comparison). I'm sure a lot of girls have heard this stuff, and sometimes they just shut it out.

 

It goes both ways. personally, I've talked to a few guys so much about my work and what I do there that I'm sure looking back, likely I inadvertently bored them to tears. You have to remember that even if you think some things are awesome and noteworthy, others could care less.

 

Sometimes we cannot help that our life is boring in comparison to other people, especially at a young age when everyone is just trying to get their life together. Some people thrive on the simple stuff, a LOT of people are materialistic, and certain could care less what they're doing in the next three years. I used to be very angry that a lot of women would talk about the most mundane, stupid stuff all of the time when I went out in public. I used to wonder what was wrong with my sex. After a while, I realized that a lot of guys are mundane and boring as well - they just tend to talk less in public!

 

ANYWAYS, I suggest that you focus less on what you have to offer each other intellectually and more on living in the moment. Worry less about earning the air you breathe, and laugh a little. You might find that girls that haven't had a lot of experiences could find more inspiration with your adventurousness.