ConfusedLove Posted December 22, 2003 Share Posted December 22, 2003 Hi, Just looking for some advice, and to get things off my chest. My girlfriend is currently on a two-month trip around the world. We spent the whole week before she left together at every opportunity, and everything felt so good, we've never even argued! In all my relationships I've never felt this way about anyone.... ever. Anyway, I've had almost daily emails from her telling me how much she misses me. And I was feeling it too. So I asked her if I could meet up with her partway through her trip for a week. She was so happy that I'd been thinking of her, and said she would love me to. So I booked up flights and accomodation. I then got an email from her 3 days later asking me to call her to discuss me meeting her (easier to do than emails bouncing around all over the place). When I did, she said she'd caught the travel bug, and had applied for a working holiday visa in Europe. My world suddenly turned upside-down. She said she still wanted to see me. She said she feels sad about it, she still misses me, I shouldn't look upon this trip as being the final end to things between us, she feels lucky to have met me and has me in her life. Then another email a few days later says she's counting down the days until she sees me, she hasn't been able to stop thinking about me and misses me like crazy, she can't wait to see me (and for us to have sex). She said she really does want to be with me, but now is the best opportunity for her to keep travelling. She has also said that nothing is definate, and she may come back. I don't understand how she can say all these things about missing me and wanting to be with me, yet wants to do something she knows will keep us apart. There is no reason for her to do so. If she doesn't want to be with me she has no reason for saying these things. I know that I could never give up someone if I felt very strongly about them (I actually love this girl). After all, she could ask me to go travelling with her......... Or go travelling at anytime. At least she acknowledges we have a lot to talk about when we meet up. I just love her and want to be with her no matter what. Just needed to share that. If anyone has any advice it would be good to hear it. I fly out to see her early in the new year. Link to post Share on other sites
SoleMate Posted December 22, 2003 Share Posted December 22, 2003 Well, most Loveshack questions about people travelling have grim answers. Lots of people use a long trip to get permanently away from a relationship because it seems to make things "easier" - at least on one end. However, I don't see that as being the case for you two. Other than her lengthening travel, all the signs are positive - frequent communication, loving messages, sexual desire, missing each other. And for some of us travel junkies, yes, it is quite intoxicating to be experiencing new cultures. ...I shouldn't look upon this trip as being the final end to things between us, she feels lucky to have met me and has me in her life....she's counting down the days until she sees me, she hasn't been able to stop thinking about me and misses me like crazy, she can't wait to see me (and for us to have sex). She said she really does want to be with me, but now is the best opportunity for her to keep travelling. She has also said that nothing is definite, and she may come back. Time for a little honest communication. Does she know how lonely and worried you are, and how much you want to be with her? Can you tell her? Last word: if she does not want you to travel with her 100% of the time, I would not take this as a bad sign all by itself. It is a fact that solo travellers have a more intense and "local" travel experience, since they don't have a familiar companion to fall back on. (On the other hand, if she is already travelling with anyone from her own culture and doesn't want you to join her, that is bad news for the two of you.) Hope this helps - it's quite likely you have nothing to worry about. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedLove Posted December 22, 2003 Share Posted December 22, 2003 Maybe I'm overreacting. I had my last girlfriend ditch me after I travelled half way around the world to go travelling (although this was with her, not to se her along the way). I guess I'm feeling a sense of deja vu. We will talk. One thing we do have is the ability to communicate well. Two of the things that attracted me to her the first night we met was how easily we talked, not just small talk, but about who we were deep down, and ironically, the other was because she enjoyed to travel!!!! I will definately open my heart to her, because if I don't and there's ever any doubt's it will rip me apart. Thanks Originally posted by SoleMate Time for a little honest communication. Does she know how lonely and worried you are, and how much you want to be with her? Can you tell her? Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedLove Posted January 5, 2004 Share Posted January 5, 2004 Well. I was over-reacting. When we met up everything was great. I didn't haev to say anything, because she did all the talking. To cut a long story short, she loves me and doesn't want us to split up. We will go travelling together in the future, once I can tie up some ends here! Wow. Sometimes there are happy endings! Link to post Share on other sites
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