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Bringing the past into the future?


Seek Soul

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Before I was married to my wife, I ended up having a fling with someone. I ended it and a few months later , and I married my wife; we're doing great, she's pregnant now and we're expecting a beautiful baby in August.

 

This woman I had the 'fling' with got pregnant around the same exact time we had sex, but she was also sleeping with a few other guys that I knew of--so I just didn't think much about it. Her baby is 3 weeks now, and I've just never thought much about the child being mine.

 

The mother isn't the greatest parent out there, she has been arrested for drugs several times, and the state is about ready to take this child away from her. I am guessing they asked who the other parent was, and she threw a few names out there--I was one.

 

I don't know how true this is, but I am considering getting a DNA test....I am not sure how my wife would take this, Should I tell her after I take the test and I know more details

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if i were you, - yes, i'd take the test and only tell my wife if the baby is yours.

 

i mean - if you got her pregnant, it was before the marriage & all, so your ass is clear, but it's still such an unpleasant issue, i wouldn't bring it up unless necessary.

 

-yes

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Yes is right...

 

But. did you have the affair while you two were together? If so, and the child is yours, oh boy, there is going to be some conflict.

 

I completely agree about not telling your wife about this if, the baby is not yours, and the affair happened outside of your realtionship with her.

 

I've made the mistake of disclosing to much info and it WILL come back and bite you in the butt!

 

You are making a good decision to get the DNA test. No child deserves to be without their mother or father.

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I'm not wanting to disagree with Yes and K.....but.......if you had a fling BEFORE your wife was in the picture..why can't you just be honest about it? It was a piece of A$$ which went terribly wrong. You may or may not be the father. She will ONLY accept all this if you are upfront and honest. Well, if she were me......and she may not be.

 

Deal is....you are going to be faced with a law suit....and need protection.

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You know Arabess has a good point there. Why should you hide it anyway?

 

I guess from an experience I had (that and I talk way too much!) was the thought that you shouldn't tell.

 

After reading the post, I do agree that if you really have a loving relationship, you should be able to talk on this, your child or not.

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Sounds like to me he had the fling before they married (not before they got together).

 

Wow what a loving thing for a husband to do to his pregnant wife, tell her he cheated AND could have another child :mad:

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