Would you consider me a "womanizer"?

[Not the love ace]

Okay, this word womanizer has been an all too common terminology that a lot of my peers tend to label me as. Honestly, it's become very annoying and has frustrated me a lot for I think I am far from a womanizer.

 

Thanks to the popularity of this term, I feel that a lot of people just want to quickly label me or people like me as a womanizer for like of a better term or because they simply can't really comprehend how I go about relationships and disagree with how I do things, therefore they call me this.

 

I ask you members of this site this and I'll explain.

 

After the break up of my last girlfriend, whom I was in a exclusive and committed relationship with; I went back to my "old ways" of doing things. The way I function is that I have mutual relationships with multiple ladies and we're basically very good friends with very good benefits I guess you can say. Some whom I am sexually active with, and some whom I just have a more emotional, romantic and more deep relationship with.

 

Like I stated, I am good friends with all the ladies and they are fully aware that if I am not with them, then I might be with another lady and vice versa for them. I have no bones in my closest and I don't lie to any of the women. Some of the women are aware and that's the reason why they don't have sex with me because they want more exclusivity between us but enjoy my company very much and I respect that like they return the decorum to me.

 

I don't use any of the ladies for anything. I support myself, have my own money, my own place and if anything I take them out for dinner, movie, etc. I never act like I am some "playboy" or "mac daddy" and I treat them with utmost respect like I'll treat anyone else. Sometimes, they'll even hang with me and the other girl I am interested or I'll hang with them and the other guy/girl they might be interested in.

 

There's no issue's, no fighting, no B.S. However, my friends (mostly the women) always want to argue morals and ethics with me and tell me what I am doing is wrong, and is going to hurt someone. If its not that, they think I do what I do because they assume they have the answers to the reason why I am doing things. They think I am trying to fill a void since my ex, or because I am simply....A WOMANIZER!!!

 

It truly upsets me, especially since I always treat women with respect, and I was raised by and around women my whole life. They don't seem to understand that I just simply love women, and love being and interacting with different type of women. At this stage of my life, I am not ready to settle down with just one lady and I probably won't for a very long time if ever.

 

Not only that, I kind of inherited this way of going about relationships through my mother and seen how she was always with multiple men and maintained an open relationship with them. It showed me that there was nothing wrong with it and I didn't look at my mother any differently because in the end, she is my mother and I do love her and it doesn't change who she is.

 

I just wish my peers would understand me better instead of passing down judgment and ridicule.

 

However, like I stated, what is your opinion? Do you think men or women, that I am a womanizer? Be honest, let me hear your thoughts.

[Ms. Joolie]

However, like I stated, what is your opinion? Do you think men or women, that I am a womanizer? Be honest, let me hear your thoughts.

 

 

Definition: Womanizer

a man who likes many women and has short sexual relationships with them

 

(wordnet.web.princeton.edu/perl/webwn)

 

 

 

So really... it's for you to tell us.

[GAchasen]

Yikes! Yes, you're a womanizer! I'm sorry, considering I always get stuck with men who portray these same acts. I guess at least you're honest, though. Lol...

[make me believe]

When I think of a womanizer I think of a guy who lies to get what he wants from women (sex) & doesn't respect them. It sounds like you're up-front and honest with these women, so no I wouldn't consider you a womanizer.

[reservoirdog1]

Assuming you're being up front with us -- and you sound like you are -- the important question is not whether or not you meet some dictionary definition of "womanizer", but whether or not there's anything wrong with what you're doing.

 

From my perspective, there isn't.

 

The male friends who take issue with your lifestyle most likely do so for one reason: they're jealous. Hell, I'd be jealous too. As a guy who is unattached and WANTS to be that way, you're living the dream. Well done, sir.

 

The female friends who take issue with this sound like they know the whole story, but still choose to be your friends or sleep with you. The ones who still sleep with you, knowing the truth, are, in my humble opinion, the hypocrites in this situation. If they truly had the strength of their convictions, they'd stop sleeping with you. "Wahh, I don't like what you're doing, you use women, one of them is going to get hurt, blah blah blah... but hey, I'll still fyck you!" At least the ones who take issue with it but decline to sleep with you have some integrity.

 

Honestly, it sounds like those girls in the first group are just pulling some fairly standard crap. They like you, they fyck you, they can't claim that you've been dishonest with them, but they still want to find some way to hold the moral high ground in the situation. And if they can't find some, they'll try making it up.

 

Don't know if you'll be able to do anything to make them stop judging you. Probably not. But that probably comes with the territory. As long as they're not actually making your life miserable with their comments, you should probably just suck it up.

[Trialbyfire]

You're doing nothing wrong, as long as these women had full knowledge upfront, previous to getting invested. I have no sympathy for anyone who remains in a detrimental situation, since they have the ultimate control of walking.

 

If you waited until they invested, previous to being vocal, there's an ethics/morality issue here.

 

If you lied or lied by omission, then yes, you're lower than dirt.

[Forlorn]

You're not doing anything wrong, as long as the women you are seeing understand that there's no emotional investment up front.

 

You're not in an exclusive committed relationship, so who you see, date, bonk or otherwise hang out with is completely up to you.