40 year old guys with 27 yr old gfs, what do u guys think

[sally4sara]

I don't really think too much about the whys and what fors of relationships I'm not involved in. As long as it isn't an abusive relationship, it isn't my place to judge it or define it.

[yume]

What about a 29 year old guy dating a girl who's 19?

[sumdude]

I think what's more likely is that 40 year-olds who have been married are either socially awkward or they are a bit self-absorbed and need their independence more than they need other people.

 

Huh? How did you come to this conclusion? Fifty percent of first marriages end in divorce for any number of reasons.

[threebyfate]

I think what's more likely is that 40 year-olds who have been married are either socially awkward or they are a bit self-absorbed and need their independence more than they need other people.

Did you mean to say "40 year-olds who have never been married"? If so, I agree with you.

[xxxheartbrokenxxx]

My boyfriend is 38 and never been married, yet he ticks all the right boxes - so it's a sweeping generalisation to say that men of 40 who have never married lack social skills or are really selfish.

[Peter Attis]

I think a 40-year-old man dating a 27-year-old woman knows the game.

[arumm]

I'm 27, and was dating a 42 for a while. My reasons?

 

I found men my age to be immature and to eager to sow their oats. They aren't in an as stable place in life as somone in their 40's who knows what they want. And yes, he was well off, although I refused ot let him spend his money on me besides dinners, no fancy gifts etc...I was with him because I liked him and he did provide a sense of security (I've been burned a lot by the younger ones, they are still trying to figure out who they are and what they want).

 

However, I do think a man who has never been married in his 40's has issues and there is a reason. This man has been wounded, and was emotionally unavailable. That appealed to me as I was afraid of letting anyone get close to ME. It was unhealthy but convenient for both us.

 

I still thought he was intellignet, attractive, compatible, but what also attracted me to him was that he had the same fear of intimacy. I've seen moved on and been addressing these issues in therapy. I'm actually still friends with him, but nothing more.

 

So, it's not always about the money...sometimes it's about the security (and money does provide a sense of security).

[paperchase]

I started dating a 21 year old when I was 35 post divorce. When we met she though I was under 30 and I though she was mid 20s. She turns 24 very soon. We are almost 14 years apart.

 

Age has not been an issue when we are together. We share interests in music, food, TV. We travel, etc. We are very compatible. As a caveat, I'm young in spirit and I look very young for my age. I know all old people say that. lol but I'm blessed. My dad is 70 and he looks like a man in his early-mid 50s. I have my hair, no gray and natural washboard abs without working out. People never look at us cross when we go out.

 

Anyway, age IS a problem when it comes to her social circles. She's very concerned about what her immediate friends think and she doesn't really incorporate me into her dealings with them. They all disapprove of our relationship now that they know my age, but at the beginning they all loved me. And I think now that she's doing the math, she's grown more concerned over the numbers. I'm well to do and I do spoil her, but I'm not her sugar daddy. I've helped her mature and helped her land a very good job out of school. She's self sufficient although I pay when we go out.

 

As for me, I don't think the age is a big deal. Don't get mad, but what I'm going to say is controversial. I feel like we are both in our prime. A man's prime is mid 30s to about 40. A woman's prime is mid 20s to about 30. After that, it's all down hill. I find that women who are either unmarried or not close to getting married by 30 usually have the same kinds of issues as men who at 40 have never tied the knot. They are demanding and insufferable often.

 

But now they are also getting desperate and might want to compromise and settle down and have kids. When I take out a woman who is say 32 she is asking me questions about remarriage, kids, how many and when before I can say hello. Sometimes they act normal, almost perfect for a date or two, then you suddenly find out why this pretty woman never found her mate.

 

Now I've been married, divorced and still believe in marriage. I have two young kids and would have more under the right circumstances. (My dids are another issue with my gf because she's not ready for that and she feels like I have experienced so much without her that what we share will not have the same excitement the second time around). Anyway, I have turned down women who are 21 and even my gf's age (almost 24), but I think a woman around 27 would be ideal.

 

We could date without immediate pressure, get married, have some time to enjoy each other and then have kids. At that point she'd be in her early 30s and me in my early 40s. We'd be in the same place. And I'm sorry but the stuff about men getting old too fast is crazy. A normal, non-Hollywood woman, at 40 seems way older than an average man at 40. Some men look better as they age but that rarely happens to the opposite sex.

 

I believe men are supposed to be older. Maybe not 14 years but at least 5-10. I've heard that you divide the man's age in half and then add seven to it. That number is the age of the youngest woman he should date. Just throwing it out there...

[Mme. Chaucer]

I've heard that you divide the man's age in half and then add seven to it. That number is the age of the youngest woman he should date. Just throwing it out there...

 

Darn, there are probably no living men old enough for me to date.

 

Hey - my brother is 50 and he recently married a 25 year old hottie. I believe he purchased her from a far-off land.

[mrkleen]

There are plenty of guys in their 40s who have been married, engaged, in several long term relationships – and are still or newly single. Being that way is absolutely not indication of any kind of deep rooted problem. If anyone is messed up relationship wise, it is the average 20 something guy.

 

Love the women here that say they would only date an older guy if he was rich. Rich compared to what? The guys your age working at bars and bookstores? This is EXACTLY why older man have plenty of luck with younger girls….it is a mutual use thing. They get taken out to nice dinners and on vacations – the older guys get a hot piece of ass to mess around with and then discard when they are bored.

[Kris30]

28yo woman here who has recently went on a couple dates with a 40 yo never been married man. Will likely go on a 3rd next week.

 

Older men tend to be ready to settle & have a family. Usually more mature & not just after one thing...

[ADF]

Often, men who consistently date much younger women--and I'm not sure 27 is "much younger" in this case; I'm thikning more of 18-19 year olds--have serious domination and control issues. Yes, they like sex with nubile young bodies. But they also prefer to date women they consider less savvy, less experienced about life and who are easier to control. It is kind of ugly.