nomad0792 Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 Okay, so I'm new to the site, but here's a synopsis. -She and I were together 11 months -Broke up in mid Nov -Been in NC for a little over 2 months -Very serious relationship. Madly in love with each other. -She needed space because the nature of one of my jobs (I cast shows for a living and this one was a little risque) She begged me not to take it. -I took the job due to paying all the bills for me, her and her son. It was a tough decision, but economy was sucky. -I'm a solid guy and was faithful and no real crazy fights or abuse -She's a jealous girl (crazy since she's so beautiful). Was heavily abused by her father. -After a month of giving her space, I was getting frustrated with what seemed her getting further and further away from me. I did the begging. -The last time I saw her (mid Nov) I was at a bar with a hot friend girl of mine and afterwards I called her and told her she was just a friend and that she (my gf) was the love of my life. That would be the last time we talked. -A couple of slip-ups: 1) I read her twitter and a couple of her tweets were directed towards me (only things I would understand) 2) Sent her a x-mas card (no response) -Pretty sure she called me a couple of times under a "Private" number the 1st month. WHICH LEADS ME TO LAST SATURDAY... ...at noon and after no real contact from her (2 months) I get not 1, but 2 calls from her 5 minutes apart. I didn't answer them and let them go to VM. I have to say the anxiety was killing me. I listened to the first VM. Her Blackberry had apparently butt/purse dialed me, cuz I could hear her ordering a muffin and the VM lasted about 15 or so seconds. I have to say I was disappointed. The second VM was about 4 min long and it sounded like she was in a car with a guy. I could hear most of what they were saying. Nothing too crazy in the conversation, but it still burned me inside. It was weird to hear her voice after so long. It was bitter-sweet. Now, this is not out of the realm of possibility that she would do something like this on purpose. One time in Vegas, we were dancing at a club and I noticed she was eye flirting with this girl next to us (she's dated women...yes, yes, I know). I was upset and asked her why she was doing this. She denied it, but it was pretty damn obvious (I'm not the jealous type, but I'm not blind). THEN, immediately after denying, she told me that I was checking out the go-go dancers the whole time we were dancing and it really bothered her. Honestly, it could've been monkeys dancing up there and I would've looked. It was just so loud in there and sometimes u look around. Point is, it was a silly thing on her part, but I put that in the data bank of red flags. I'm just not the wandering eyes type. Okay, so I've talked to all of my friends that know my situation and the majority of them, especially the women, believe she did this on purpose. Mainly because they've done it themselves. Blackberries have been known to butt-dial so it's not out of the realm of possibility that it was just an accident, BUT in the year we dated I'm not sure if I've gotten an accidental call from her...maybe one time, but not sure. SO...ACCIDENTAL or INTENTIONAL? I know in the whole scheme of things it doesn't matter, but still would like an outside perspective and any similar stories. Especially if you've been the one to do the butt-dial. One other note...she had to have seen that she called me the next time she got on her phone. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 INTENTIONAL Butt dialing is so yesterday, she did it on purpose. Smoke signals should always be ignored, if a person wants to speak to you they can call you, and not with their ass.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nomad0792 Posted January 21, 2010 Author Share Posted January 21, 2010 INTENTIONAL - 1 ACCIDENT - 0 Just FYI, I don't plan on making any kind of contact. NC all the way..advice taken. Thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
deux ex machina Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 ... Okay, so I've talked to all of my friends that know my situation and the majority of them, especially the women, believe she did this on purpose. Mainly because they've done it themselves. Hahaha Blackberries have been known to butt-dial so it's not out of the realm of possibility that it was just an accident, BUT in the year we dated I'm not sure if I've gotten an accidental call from her...maybe one time, but not sure. SO...ACCIDENTAL or INTENTIONAL? I know in the whole scheme of things it doesn't matter, but still would like an outside perspective and any similar stories. Especially if you've been the one to do the butt-dial. One other note...she had to have seen that she called me the next time she got on her phone. I'm calling this INTENTIONAL w/a 30% chance of ACCIDENTAL. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nomad0792 Posted January 21, 2010 Author Share Posted January 21, 2010 So I guess we'll go with 2 to 0? Ha...I'm crazy for actually going to these lengths, but hence my obsession. Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 I am the queen of butt dialing. Never an Ex but usually someonr I don't talk to often. The grandmother of a friend of my son or the ac repairman. Its quite emharassing! Also, I get plenty of them from other BB owners. BB's are the worst if you don't lock them. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nomad0792 Posted January 21, 2010 Author Share Posted January 21, 2010 BUT, have you butt-dialed the same person TWICE within 5 minutes? So, I'm assuming you are saying an accident? Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 Think back to when the two of you were going out. Did she ever accidentally call you? Does she carry her phone in her back pocket or in her purse, like most women? Link to post Share on other sites
Author nomad0792 Posted January 21, 2010 Author Share Posted January 21, 2010 She keeps it in her hand or her purse. Rarely in her pocket. And no, she MAYBE accidently called me ONCE in the year we were together. MAYBE. And I know BB users are known for butt-dialing. I'd love to hear your opinion. Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 Yep! Just the other day I was having a drink with a few girlfriends and ones phone rang. She said its you! I took my phone out of my pocket and dropped it in my purse which was hanging on the chair. A minute later I was calling her again and hadn't touched my purse. Weird. Yes, I would guess its an accident. Especialy if she was digging in her purse for money to pay for the muffin, next time its bumped you're in the cue. Mine usually dials from address book which I have as one of the side hotbuttons. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 IMO, it was intentional. Once...possible accident. Twice? Ha... Link to post Share on other sites
Author nomad0792 Posted January 21, 2010 Author Share Posted January 21, 2010 INTENTIONAL - 3 ACCIDENTAL - 1 (BB owner) Link to post Share on other sites
xpaperxcutx Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 The first could be accidental, but the second time could be intentional. The question is, why does she still have your number? Link to post Share on other sites
Author nomad0792 Posted January 21, 2010 Author Share Posted January 21, 2010 Well, I wonder that as well, but I have my ex's phone numbers still, but, I've never butt-dialed them. Wow 'Horses...then it's possible. I suppose it debunks my whole wishful thinking. Ha. I'd be curious what type of phone everyone has that puts in a vote. Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 INTENTIONAL - 3 ACCIDENTAL - 1 (BB owner) I've also posted a FB status from my purse! Why didn't you call or msg her back and say I missed a few calls from you, is something wrong. That's what I usually do if I miss calls. I realize its an ex and you are going NC. Why would she intentionally call? Link to post Share on other sites
Author nomad0792 Posted January 21, 2010 Author Share Posted January 21, 2010 I've also posted a FB status from my purse! Why didn't you call or msg her back and say I missed a few calls from you, is something wrong. That's what I usually do if I miss calls. I realize its an ex and you are going NC. Why would she intentionally call? I'm in strict NC and believed that she may have done it on purpose, so I didn't want to respond. BUT, now you've got me thinking that it could very well have been an accident. Being a BB owner, you know when you've called someone, so she could've said something to me, but didn't. What does that say? Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 Maybe she was embarrassed? I wouldn't know I had called someone twice on my phone without checking the history of that number. On my H's BB it would show up as 2 calls. I don't record calls in the msg section though. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nomad0792 Posted January 21, 2010 Author Share Posted January 21, 2010 Funny 'Horses...you are debunking all my "well thought out" theories. It's probably for the better anyway. AND, I would be embarrassed as well, so I wouldn't say anything if I dialed someone as well...especially twice. BUT, if I'm playing YOUR devil's advocate. This is not far off from something she would do intentionally. And, to call the one guy she probably would want to NOT call out of all the people on her phone...what are the odds? Just saying, it seems terribly ironic that it would happen at such a time when she happens to be with someone (a guy and I can hear most of what they are saying...man that was painful) and I did fall off the face of the planet. So, to some degree, she has to at least wonder what the hell is going on in my life. The only other time I implemented NC for 3 days, she freaked out...and it's now been over 2 months. Wishful thinking? Perhaps...but, you seem to be very sure that it was an accident and I respect your honesty. People that know her and my situation still feel it was done on purpose, but what the hell do I know? All I'm really doing is perpetuating this nonsense, but my heart feels the way it feels. Link to post Share on other sites
abbazabba Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 Honestly, my friend just got a new Blackberry and he butt dialed a girl on accident. So, once is entirely possible. However, I feel that twice is a different story. While in her pocket, it would have to end the call and redial. Likely? I think not. I think she is trying to initiate contact without really initiating contact. Putting it on you kind of deal. I'm going with on purpose. Hope this helps and stay strong. If she wants to get a hold of you, she'll call again. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 Question: Why do you even give a 5h1t? if she's your ex, you should have blocked every single possible avenue for her to contact you. look at how much energy you've put into even giving a damn. What a waste of half a day this is..... ferchrissakes, just block her, delete her, ignore her, forget her and live YOUR life, and move on. Case closed..... jeesh...... Link to post Share on other sites
Author nomad0792 Posted January 21, 2010 Author Share Posted January 21, 2010 Tara...you tell it like it is...I love it. I've taken her off my phone and not sure how I'd go about blocking her. I've managed to avoid her all-together, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't care if it was on purpose or not. Hence the thread. I thought if I could get a resounding "IT WAS AN ACCIDENT" it would help me see the reality of the situation. Abba- thanks for the input man. I honestly don't know, but it does seem tough to call twice since you would have to hang up. Makes sense. So, to humor myself... INTENTIONAL - 4 ACCIDENT - 1 WHO GIVES A CRAP - 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 the last one - WHO GIVES A CRAP - should be - 2. Join me on the couch, I have popcorn..... Link to post Share on other sites
blackbear_703 Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 I'm guessing the first time around was a speed dial accident, but the second time?? I'm not so sure. Next time she makes another call like the one she made while w/ the other guy, call back and do something stupid, like play some song she absoultely hates over the phone. Or your silliest hillbilly impersonation. She'll delete you from her speed dial really fast! But seriously, I'm so sorry you had to hear that. I imagine it was pretty painful to hear! Hopefully she'll be more considerate of your feelings in the future. Link to post Share on other sites
DenverBachelor Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 Most definitely accidental. I owned three blackberries in my time and I have done this with tight jeans on. Once you call someone and they don't answer, it goes to their voicemail and when the voicemail times out, the call ends. Then, on many blackberries, all you have to do is hold or press the send button and it will immediately call the last number dialed. I know this because I was once in Vegas and called my mom 5 times in a row. Fortunately the night was still young. Link to post Share on other sites
Hersheys Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 Please click one of the Quick Reply icons in the posts above to activate Quick Reply. Link to post Share on other sites
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