ty1987 Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 Two years ago I was prescribed Tramadol for back pain. The first time I tried it I was amazed at how good/happy it made me feel. It gave me so much energy and made me much more outgoing (which was nice, because I'm typically very shy). But after my prescription ran out, I was done with Tramadol...or so I thought. About 10 months ago, I started getting very depressed. I hated my life, hated myself, and generally had no interest in anything whatsoever. After a few weeks of being depressed, I decided I would try to get my hands on some Tramadol to make me feel better. The good news for me was that I didn't even have to see a doc to get it. You can buy Tramadol online via an "online consultation." I did NOT want to have to go see a doctor about my depression, as I was somewhat embarassed and didn't feel comfortable talking to anyone about it. So, I started buying Tramadol online. 180 pills for $100, delivered the next day. Once I was back on the Tramadol, my life was great again. I was happy. After about 3 months of taking the pills everyday, I became very addicted. Unfortunatley, the pills lost their effect after time. Now, nearly a year into my addiciton, I take the pills just to function. I am completely miserable again. I hate myself, hate my life, and have no interest in anything whatsoever. The only person in this world that made me happy was my girlfriend, who just left me two days ago. She was the one bright spot in my life. She was also the only person who knows about my addiction. I wanted so desperately to get sober for her. I wanted to make her happy, and I knew that I could never do that while addicted to Tramadol. Now that she's gone I feel like I have nothing to live for. I'm completely alone. I know I was a fool for thinking I could self-medicate in the first place, but I know there's nothing I can do about it now. If anyone has any advice or can help in any way, please let me know. Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted January 21, 2010 Share Posted January 21, 2010 are you clean or still actively using them? Link to post Share on other sites
Author ty1987 Posted January 22, 2010 Author Share Posted January 22, 2010 I'm still using them. I've tried to stop using but the withdrawals are so bad I can't stand it. Link to post Share on other sites
dazzle22 Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 Why is having depression more stigmatized to you than being addicted? There is plenty you can do. See a doctor and get on the right antidepressant for awhile and who can help you get off the tramadol.. You are in a vicious downward spiral right now. Where are you getting this tramadol? I want to turn them in. Seriously! Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 Go to a doctor who can help you get off the physical addiction. That's the first step. I don't know what Tramadol is, but you are likely to need a doctor's assistance in minimizing the physical withdrawal. You shouldn't need any psychological help getting off it, since its effectiveness has worn off and it doesn't make you feel good anymore and it really doesn't do anything for you. Good luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Jade 02 Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 How long,and how many MGS matters of the days you will go through withdrawls,and you mentioned ten months after you stopped taking them,you felt like Sh*t,I'd go threw the harsh 8 days of W/D's NOW,and then seek some help,and throw the pills away,and if your girl loves you,she will help you in any way. If you chose not to seek help,and keep looking for drugs,your life will get worse. Sorry but It will. I have went through this sh*t myself,and it did get worse. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ty1987 Posted January 22, 2010 Author Share Posted January 22, 2010 Why is having depression more stigmatized to you than being addicted? There is plenty you can do. See a doctor and get on the right antidepressant for awhile and who can help you get off the tramadol.. You are in a vicious downward spiral right now. Where are you getting this tramadol? I want to turn them in. Seriously! Taking anti-depressants with tramadol is a big no-no. It greatly increases your chances of having a seizure during withdrawals. You can buy tramadol all over the internet. When tramadol came out, it was advertised as a NON addictive pain killer. Technically it's not an opiate, but it still acts on the same opiate receptors of the brain. I've come to find that there are thousands of people in the same predicament I'm in right now. Tramaol IS very much addictive, yet continues to NOT be a controlled substance in the US. That is why you can legally buy it online via an "online consultation." I know I'm in a very bad place right now. If I could go back in time, I would never have even touched tramadol. Link to post Share on other sites
dazzle22 Posted January 22, 2010 Share Posted January 22, 2010 I am well aware of tramadol. I am a doctor. I was not implying you should get on the antidepressant at the same time. I was suggesting, and perhaps the wording was confusing, get help getting off it, and then going on a legimate antidepressant to get out of the awful feeling depression that drove you to the tramadol in the first place.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author ty1987 Posted January 23, 2010 Author Share Posted January 23, 2010 I am well aware of tramadol. I am a doctor. I was not implying you should get on the antidepressant at the same time. I was suggesting, and perhaps the wording was confusing, get help getting off it, and then going on a legimate antidepressant to get out of the awful feeling depression that drove you to the tramadol in the first place.... Do you have any recommendations on how to go about getting off the tramadol? I've heard going cold turkey can likely lead to seizures, which scares the hell out of me. At the same time, if I taper all it takes is one bad day and I lose all the progress I made. Also, I'm curious if you have ever prescribed tramadol to your patients? Or if you knew it was highly addictive, which my doctor (and many doctors) didn't know. Thanks for the help. Link to post Share on other sites
dazzle22 Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 It is a total mystery to me how this drug slipped by the DEA and FDA without being labeled a narcotic with addiction potential...Because it does not need a narcotic script pad, a lot of doctors are not highly aware of this potential. And the drug company reps really pushed it hard as a "non narcotic pain med with pain relief like a narcotic". I remember the reps saying, it is like a T#3 without the addiction potential. I really DISLIKE drug reps... I have used it for select patients in the past. But never gave more than 20 tabs for an acute severe pain problem and never gave refills. I think certain people have a neurochemistry that makes them more susceptible to addiction to this med, as in other narcotics. Some people get hooked, other people, these meds do "nothing" for them... You are right. Cold turkey can increase risk of seizures. Bad spot to be in. Do you have medical insurance? You need to see a doctor well versed in getting people off narcotics. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ty1987 Posted January 24, 2010 Author Share Posted January 24, 2010 (edited) Yes, I do have medical insurance. My primary doctor is the one who prescribed me the tramadol in the first place...I don't think I want him to be involved in helping me with my addiction. Are there docs who specialize in addiction? Should I consider rehab? I don't know what to do. The only thing I know is I'm hurting terribly right now. I wish I never touched tramadol in the first place...even though I know I'm 100% to blame for the situation I'm in right now. Edited January 24, 2010 by ty1987 Link to post Share on other sites
dazzle22 Posted January 24, 2010 Share Posted January 24, 2010 Just some ideas.... I actually think it is important for doctors to know when they have made a mistake. We are all human, and it frankly is impossible to know everything about all the drugs. ( Not in an adversarial way, or "I'm going to sue you" threatening way). I always tell patients, doctors NEED the feedback when a mistake was made. I tell them, if they want, I can tell their doctor in a non confrontational way what happened if they themselves can't do it. This is one alternative- go to your doctor. Tell him, that unfortunately, you appear to have become physically addicted to tramadol and that you have tried to go off it and are experiencing withdrawals. It is very important for him to know that this happened as a result of being put on that med by him. Ask for a referral to an addiction specialty clinic. It is important to have a proper referral to get this paid for. There are various approaches. Some admit pts and do an intense quick detox with IV meds to stabilize a patient. Others cover the patient with meds like clonidine to decrease the withdrawal symptoms as the patient tapers off. You are going to feel terrible for awhile, because these opioid receptors are going to be "screaming" for their med. You likely will feel very depressed, and then when you are off it, they should work with you to find the right antidepressant for you to be on for awhile to stabilize your depression. This will be hard, but the alternative is worse. Link to post Share on other sites
turkstragal Posted February 8, 2010 Share Posted February 8, 2010 The easiest thing to do would be to quit the pills cold turkey and suffer the withdrawals for a few days. As a recovering addict though I know not everyone is able to do this. Look into treatment programs in your area. They will help with the withdrawals as well as provide counselling and treatment for the depression. Its really had when you try to do it all on your own expecially when you suffer from depression as well..I hope all goes well for you..Best of luck Link to post Share on other sites
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