Very Situation

[BehindNorthernLines]

**Thread Title should be 'Confusing Situation' By the way**

 

Okay, I live in the UK and live in a rented house at university with 6 other people. All of which I would consider good friends. One of the girls who lives with me I have known since my freshman year (I didn't live with her in the first year, I am now a second year.) and I'm very confused as to our relationship.

 

I've always had feelings for her since we met, but when we met I had just gotten out of a three year relationship that had a horrible break up, and I had no confidence or self esteem, so I didn't ask her out, despite flirting a lot. For the first few months, she would make effort to make body contact with me, dance with me when we were out, give much more attention to me than the other guys in our group, but as I was still hurting from my previous relationship, I didn't return her signals that much and she eventually stopped trying.

 

Now almost a year on, and I've been ready for a while to get back into dating, but it's gotten to the point where we've been friends for a long time, and we live together now so I'm not sure it's worth the risk of asking her out and it ending up that she doesn't like me now and creating a weirdness in the house. We do get on really well and have a lot in common, and I do think we would make a good couple, but I'm not sure it's worth risking a friendship on.

 

We are both part of a large group of party goers that always go out together, but usually the genders seperate as none of us are dating eachother, and she hates it when I flirt with other girls while she is with the girls from our group. I'm not sure though if this is because she just likes my attention or not, as she also flirts with a lot of guys when we're out. Also, I live a long way from the university, and in the summer and at christmas when I'm away she texts me a lot and tells me she misses me; although she may do that to all the guys in the house.

 

Also, last summer we all were visiting the house of one of the guys in our group for the weekend, and one of the nights before we went out we were talking about making a first impression, and she says "I always make a bad first impression." to which I replied, "I'm the same, I never make a good first impression. I never know what to say." and she said, "You made a good impression with me. I've liked you ever since we met." I didn't know how to take it and it caught me off guard, and we couldn't talk any longer because we were interrupted. I'm not sure now as to whether she meant then that she liked me as a friend or she was trying to confess that she was into me and I missed my shot then.

 

Should I risk it and just ask her if she wants to go out on a date, or accept I had my shot, or do you think that she may have put me in the 'friend zone' after so long?

 

 

I'm just so confused. Any opinions would be appreciated. Sorry if this post is too long!

[fiatflux]

Doesn't sound all that confusing to me...it sounds like she's still into you but has just given up on you ever making a move. I seriously doubt she texts all the other guys in the house that she misses them...do you really believe that? I think you should ask her out on a date and see where it goes from there.

[paddington bear]

I agree with Fiatflux

 

Ask yourself this, what if, next week she comes home and tells you that she's met this amazing guy? You would be kicking yourself. You would have to live with that, and to hear about it and him and them and their blossoming relationship, always wondering what would have happened if you'd made a move.

 

She likes you, doubt she texts the other guys, the comment about how you made a good impression says it all.

 

Got to weigh up whether getting rejected by her or watching some other guy is worse. I'm guessing if you really like her, having to watch her waltz off into the sunset with someone else would be a nightmare. At least if you say or do something first, and it doesn't work out, you know you put your cards on the table and gave it your best shot. Yeah it will hurt and be embarrassing if she doesn't like you back, but one way or another you'll find that out at some point in a different way. Better to get it out and off your chest and take it from there.

 

He who hesitates is lost. I know this from experience. The longer you wait, the harder it is to do something, or say something and it all gets so weighty.