EricaH329 Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 (you probably read this in another thread...) I had a dream that very night I laid my ex to rest (faux-burial)... there we were arm in arm, slow dancing to the silence of the night. I whispered, "I love you" in her ear. She looked up to me and smiled... but it was like I couldn't see into her eyes... they were glossy ... she whispered something, but I couldn't make it out... and the room began to burn. She held onto me tighter... and ever tighter as the floor began to give way. She lost her footing, but I would not hold on any longer... ...let me tell you, best cry I ever had when I woke up at 3:30am that morning. Didn't get back to sleep. Showered at 5am and just sat in my living room on my couch looking up to the sky.. I had a GREAT day. I was smiling again. I'm not afraid to cry these days... and I'm quite sure, the day I hear from my ex again (as I'm sure she knows I blocked her and is probably pissed/shocked I did... but accepting of why I did and letting me be for now).. I will cry once more... but I will not mourn myself. I will mourn her loss. Me. That dream has such insane symbolism attached to it. I would have woken up in a daze also!! It feels great to cry after you've gone through something emotionally taxing. And BTW -- there is absolutely nothing wrong with a man that cries. To be honest (and this might sound a little strange), I find it sexy when a man isn't afraid to cry. Let's me know he isn't some emotionless robot No need to mourn her loss, allow her to do that once she realizes what a great person she lost. I'm telling you from personal experience, that once you realize that you let a wonderful person go, it haunts you for the rest of your life. You have to live with that torment that you are not with someone that was perfect. It sucks, a lot more than what you are going through right now. So in the end, she loses. HA! Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 Erica, Kel... for not knowing me... my past, my present, my future... for blindly helping me... being there unconditionally... for a grown man who is dreaming with a broken heart. ...thank you (yet again). You both (and my avatar) constantly remind me that hearth, warmth, love, compassion, companionship, friends, and all those subtle niceties that define human nature and bring us comfort do exist If you ever give me that bubbly-eyed heart face again...I swear... And you're right, there are good people out there...both friends and lovers...it's just a matter of finding them...and holding onto them... By the way, what is your avatar from...? Link to post Share on other sites
Author bananaboat11 Posted January 25, 2010 Author Share Posted January 25, 2010 If you ever give me that bubbly-eyed heart face again...I swear... And you're right, there are good people out there...both friends and lovers...it's just a matter of finding them...and holding onto them... By the way, what is your avatar from...? a friend and his girlfriend... ... LOL! kidding god, I need to stop using these smilies LOL Link to post Share on other sites
EricaH329 Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 Good lord, I leave for a few minutes to cook dinner and come back to find that I have to play catch up... That's the only problem with forums. If everyone is on at once, you can't leave your computer or you'll be stuck reading an hour worth of stuff. And at least you have a queen size bed. I sleep on a twin size mattress that sits on the floor. I call it "spartan". That is absolutely hilarious!!! Erica, Kel... for not knowing me... my past, my present, my future... for blindly helping me... being there unconditionally... for a grown man who is dreaming with a broken heart. ...thank you (yet again). You both (and my avatar) constantly remind me that hearth, warmth, love, compassion, companionship, friends, and all those subtle niceties that define human nature and bring us comfort do exist That's very nice of you to say Rob!!!! Thank you!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author bananaboat11 Posted January 25, 2010 Author Share Posted January 25, 2010 It's funny.. the way I express myself on these forums... is not what a woman really wants. What a woman SAYS she wants and what she ACTUALLY wants are 2 different things. Link to post Share on other sites
EricaH329 Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 a friend and his girlfriend... ... LOL! kidding god, I need to stop using these smilies LOL You gotta remember, Kelvin is a marine. They are trained to hate those heart smilies Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 That's the only problem with forums. If everyone is on at once, you can't leave your computer or you'll be stuck reading an hour worth of stuff. Yea...this has been duly noted... That is absolutely hilarious!!! And it's also a rudimentary, yet highly effective form of birth control. Like those glasses they give you at boot camp. Link to post Share on other sites
EricaH329 Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 It's funny.. the way I express myself on these forums... is not what a woman really wants. What a woman SAYS she wants and what she ACTUALLY wants are 2 different things. I hate it when people say that. Hate doesn't even begin to describe my feelings towards that sentance. Resentment, loathing... etc. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bananaboat11 Posted January 25, 2010 Author Share Posted January 25, 2010 Kel... Erica. Thanks again I'm going to head to sleep. Need to be up @ 7:30A... and it's 3:15A... fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffml. Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 It's funny.. the way I express myself on these forums... is not what a woman really wants. What a woman SAYS she wants and what she ACTUALLY wants are 2 different things. Yea...I wasn't gonna say anything...but yea... You gotta remember, Kelvin is a marine. They are trained to hate those heart smilies ^^^ And that too.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author bananaboat11 Posted January 25, 2010 Author Share Posted January 25, 2010 I hate it when people say that. Hate doesn't even begin to describe my feelings towards that sentance. Resentment, loathing... etc. Honestly? I find I am not perfect, but I am in touch with who I am. When I am with someone.. I am with THEM and only them. I want to fall head over heels for her.. for someone who will fall head over heels for me... and love eachother like crazy... to risk everything and take no regrets... Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 Kel... Erica. Thanks again I'm going to head to sleep. Need to be up @ 7:30A... and it's 3:15A... fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffml. Anytime, Rob. It's always a pleasure. And lay off with the FML'ing. Seriously. It's quite unbecoming of you. Link to post Share on other sites
EricaH329 Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 And it's also a rudimentary, yet highly effective form of birth control. Like those glasses they give you at boot camp. OMFG :lmao::lmao::lmao: I'm seriously laughing my @$$ off right now. I'm actually wearing those glasses right now! I don't need them when i'm out in public, so i'm not going to bother spending $500 on a new pair. I never ever ever ever ever let anyone see me in them though. Link to post Share on other sites
EricaH329 Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 Honestly? I find I am not perfect, but I am in touch with who I am. When I am with someone.. I am with THEM and only them. I want to fall head over heels for her.. for someone who will fall head over heels for me... and love eachother like crazy... to risk everything and take no regrets... I know. I am the same exact way. I think everyone is when it comes to love. And that's ok. It's just we need to be more careful with who we give our hearts to. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bananaboat11 Posted January 25, 2010 Author Share Posted January 25, 2010 Anytime, Rob. It's always a pleasure. And lay off with the FML'ing. Seriously. It's quite unbecoming of you. hahahaha.. I actually ranted for a good hour the other day b/c one of my friends publicly... well... "U BrInG ThA PaRtEiGh iLL BrInG MAI PUSSEIGH♥ " lol iznt et kute? i ♥ et....". Grammar... wtf. use it. Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 OMFG :lmao::lmao::lmao: I'm seriously laughing my @$$ off right now. I'm actually wearing those glasses right now! I don't need them when i'm out in public, so i'm not going to bother spending $500 on a new pair. I never ever ever ever ever let anyone see me in them though. Hahahah, niiiice... I'm picturing you with them on now... Image has been permanently ingrained in my mind... Telling me that was a mistake, Erica... Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 Honestly? I find I am not perfect, but I am in touch with who I am. When I am with someone.. I am with THEM and only them. I want to fall head over heels for her.. for someone who will fall head over heels for me... and love eachother like crazy... to risk everything and take no regrets... Just like you, I want this more than anything in life...and as time passes by, I realize that all the pain we may go through is worth it if we can someday find this in the end...it makes love worth it... Link to post Share on other sites
Author bananaboat11 Posted January 25, 2010 Author Share Posted January 25, 2010 But for now... I am envious of you both. ..my heart is in my keeping alone and will not be shared for some time... but goodnight. Link to post Share on other sites
EricaH329 Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 hahahaha.. I actually ranted for a good hour the other day b/c one of my friends publicly... well... "U BrInG ThA PaRtEiGh iLL BrInG MAI PUSSEIGH♥ " lol iznt et kute? i ♥ et....". Grammar... wtf. use it. After reading that, grammar wasn't my main concern. The sentance itself was. Hahahah, niiiice... I'm picturing you with them on now... Image has been permanently ingrained in my mind... Telling me that was a mistake, Erica... Oh godddd... the image can't be as worse as it actually is. They are entirely too big for my face. But you're right, I probably shouldn't have said anything Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 But for now... I am envious of you both. ..my heart is in my keeping alone and will not be shared for some time... but goodnight. ":love:" Night buddy. Link to post Share on other sites
EricaH329 Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 But for now... I am envious of you both. ..my heart is in my keeping alone and will not be shared for some time... but goodnight. Goodnight Rob!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author bananaboat11 Posted January 25, 2010 Author Share Posted January 25, 2010 Don't know if you guys are Linkin Park fans... but here, an older remix/extended mix of mine... "A New Divide" - Linkin Park (dj baby g RMX XTEND) http://www18.zippyshare.com/v/59823754/file.html (download or steam) night =) (for the millionth time LOL) Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 Oh godddd... the image can't be as worse as it actually is. They are entirely too big for my face. But you're right, I probably shouldn't have said anything Hahahahah. Said image has just been upgraded. Nothing sexier than a girl in a nice outfit, hair, makeup, and some honkin' BCG's... Link to post Share on other sites
EricaH329 Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 Don't know if you guys are Linkin Park fans... but here, an older remix/extended mix of mine... "A New Divide" - Linkin Park (dj baby g RMX XTEND) http://www18.zippyshare.com/v/59823754/file.html (download or steam) night =) (for the millionth time LOL) I'll check it out. You did a really good job on the first one you did, there's no doubt that this will be just as great. Hahahahah. Said image has just been upgraded. Nothing sexier than a girl in a nice outfit, hair, makeup, and some honkin' BCG's... Omg, i'm about to fall off my chair i'm laughing so hard! I'm just now realizing I posted that publicly.... fail. Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 Don't know if you guys are Linkin Park fans... but here, an older remix/extended mix of mine... "A New Divide" - Linkin Park (dj baby g RMX XTEND) http://www18.zippyshare.com/v/59823754/file.html (download or steam) night =) (for the millionth time LOL) I love both of the scores to the Transfomers movies as well as Linkin Park. This was quite impressive, and I enjoyed listening. Very well done. Link to post Share on other sites
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