For the men

[Jeff1962]

You know that's pretty LOL funny. I hope and pray what I'm doing with my wife is the right thing, but for all I know, she could walk in the door tomorrow and tell me she's leaving me for the Fed Ex man and I'm not sure that would come as a shock.

 

Maybe you are doing it wrong.

[Jeff1962]

Jeff, you sound like such a good guy but just like simon said...marriage is a two way street. She needs to take care of you as well or else it will never work. Keep your head up.

 

Thank you. You seem like a nice person. I appreciate your support and advice.

[Jeff1962]

Disregard the cynics, Jeff. Rare is the man to research what women really want in an effort to improve not only themselves, but their relationship with that woman.

 

And to the cynics, a man who knows how women tick can get all the tail he wants.....or he can be "right!"

 

Thank you Spark.

[Jeff1962]

A woman is like a rose. If you nurture her, she will bloom. If you don't she will wither.

 

If you love your wives. Do yourselves a favor and show them everyday.

 

thank you, Jeff, for putting this out there ... as an old married chick, I can tell you those are the things that keep me hanging in there when angry pride tells me I can find something "better" elsewhere. Because when it comes down to it, a woman's loyalty is with the guy who treats her like she's the most incredible girl he's ever met in his life, and she'll put up with the stupid stuff he says and does, as well as his annoying traits. Simply because she realizes what they have together cannot be duplicated elsewhere ...

 

for you naysayers (like Woggle), believe what you will, but I realize you are pitting what I say against what you believe to be true. And for that reason, I feel really, really sorry for you, because you will never truly enjoy the devoted love of a good woman.

 

Thank you for your honesty. Despit our differences, she's my girl.

[Jeff1962]

.............

 

To be honest with you Butternutter, now that I think about it. I could care less about your opinions. I find you to be inanely immature.

[Buttnutter100]

To be honest with you Butternutter, now that I think about it. I could care less about your opinions. I find you to be inanely immature.

 

Jeff, go tell your wife you would like to have sex with her.

[JamesM]

Butternut....

 

I feel for you. You do have a difficult situation in that now you really never know if she is thinking of you or someone else...even if you do things just perfectly.

 

I appreciate your advice although as a newcomer, you do seem to have plenty of advice. After four years and a few months, we see many people come and go. So, when someone jumps in who appears to have all the answers (at least in his or her own mind ), we will be somewhat harsh.

 

I don't agree with all that you say, but for your situation it may be a start. For someone in a sexless marriage (which IS different than what you have), I don't think it will be as effective. Simply asking the wife for sex or giving her extra attention ignores the reality of the situation for most of us. Read my many threads and read those of others who have similar situations. It can be exhausting just to list the many things that have been tried.

 

Point is....your generalities may work for one situation but in the next they need not apply. You slip over the fact that it may be medical and yet you do not realize that many are. You seem to think that men need to simply take charge and solve the problems and it will be over, yet for many, women use sex as control. Taking charge would make it worse.

 

You do seem to have alot of good advice. I don't think it comes of as immature, but for me, it does not speak of experience in a sexless marriage. Now that I read your situation, I see why you are trying what you are, but even still, I am not sure that it will work for you...and you don't know either.

 

You know that's pretty LOL funny. I hope and pray what I'm doing with my wife is the right thing, but for all I know, she could walk in the door tomorrow and tell me she's leaving me for the Fed Ex man and I'm not sure that would come as a shock.

 

Maybe you are doing it wrong.

 

My thoughts, too. Your advice is yet unproven.

 

Jeff, I know what you feel in many ways as I have been there and am there. I can only begin by suggesting that you exhaust every possible angle.

 

1. Is it medical? Does your wife have any issues that may prevent her from liking sex?

2. Is it past abuse? You may not know.

3. Is it emotional? Does she have issues with her own inadequacy as an inexperienced wife (maybe in her eyes only) as compared to you the sexually experienced guy? Has she ever in any way mentioned that she is bothered by the many sexcapades and women you had in the past before her?

4. What issues are between the two of you? Children? Finances? Any other arguments?

5. What is her opinion of you as a husband and father? Do you drink too much beer or watch too much football? Does she think you are lazy?

6. As you mentioned, you felt there was a sexual problem the other night? Is this a repeat problem?

 

Even after all of these question are done, you may still need to look.

 

The question remains and must be in your mind....is this worth it all, or rather is SHE worth it all? And if she is, then move forward and never look back, knowing that sex with her is in a completely different league than sex with just any woman.

 

Good luck.

[Jeff1962]

 

 

 

 

My thoughts, too. Your advice is yet unproven.

 

Jeff, I know what you feel in many ways as I have been there and am there. I can only begin by suggesting that you exhaust every possible angle.

 

1. Is it medical? Does your wife have any issues that may prevent her from liking sex?

2. Is it past abuse? You may not know.

3. Is it emotional? Does she have issues with her own inadequacy as an inexperienced wife (maybe in her eyes only) as compared to you the sexually experienced guy? Has she ever in any way mentioned that she is bothered by the many sexcapades and women you had in the past before her?

4. What issues are between the two of you? Children? Finances? Any other arguments?

5. What is her opinion of you as a husband and father? Do you drink too much beer or watch too much football? Does she think you are lazy?

6. As you mentioned, you felt there was a sexual problem the other night? Is this a repeat problem?

 

Even after all of these question are done, you may still need to look.

 

The question remains and must be in your mind....is this worth it all, or rather is SHE worth it all? And if she is, then move forward and never look back, knowing that sex with her is in a completely different league than sex with just any woman.

 

Good luck.

 

No medical issues.

 

No past abuse.

 

She has mentioned before a long time ago that knowing I had many sexual partners before her did hurt her feelings. She did not try to make me feel bad, I think it's because she loves me and hates the thought of me ever being with another woman.

 

Normal issues between us. Kids, finances, Normal arguments.

 

Her opinion of me matters a great deal to me. She tells me I'm a good H and a good father.

 

We both drink but not to excess. We both love football and watch it together.

 

Last nite we did make love again. Once again, blammo she had an orgasm. Thought she was going to hit the ceiling. I stayed erect, no orgasm. This bothers her. She knows that I have always been slow to reach climax. I need more stimulation. I need to mix it up more to really get there. Know what I mean?

 

She works in the medical field and is going to get me in to see the doctor.

 

We've had our dry spells. She said that she feels that she does not do it for me because I don't always reach orgasm. I reasurre her that this is not the case.

[Lizzie60]

From what I read here.. maybe she finds the love session to be too much work.. and too much anxiety for her to deal with .. since she's anxious that you have problems reaching climax... she may think it's her or something.. even if you say it's not her.. she might think you're only sparing her feelings.. it's not easy.

 

But methink she just finds sex too much work.. (for you) I could be wrong though..

[giotto]

From what I read here.. maybe she finds the love session to be too much work.. and too much anxiety for her to deal with .. since she's anxious that you have problems reaching climax... she may think it's her or something.. even if you say it's not her.. she might think you're only sparing her feelings.. it's not easy.

 

But methink she just finds sex too much work.. (for you) I could be wrong though..

 

possibly... personally, if I were a woman and my man didn't climax with me or soon after, I would find it a bit frustrating... I occasionally don't climax with my wife - she can be a bit quick as well... lol - but I can correct this quite quickly...

[JamesM]

I agree with Lizzie....for her sex is not fun, it is work. And the fact that you take a long time to orgasm, she may see this as an inadequacy on her part...especially if you had no problems before her.

 

You may have said, but I cannot recall...

 

How often do the two of you have sex?

[Lizzie60]

Jeff.. turn the table around... let's say you were quick to orgasm.. but you had to work 'overtime' to make her climax... I doubt you'd want sex as often... you probably would masterbate more often...

 

 

Sometimes people rather masturbate because sex play is too much time consuming.. or physically exhausting..

[Buttnutter100]

Jeff, this post is meant to be serious, not infantile. It really sounds like there is some kind of medical issue which is solvable. See below:

 

 

 

 

Delayed ejaculation

 

MedlinePlus Topics

 

Sexual Health

 

Images

 

Male reproductive system

 

 

Read More

 

Inhibited sexual desire

 

 

Delayed ejaculation is a medical condition in which a male is unable to ejaculate, either during intercourse or with manual stimulation in the presence of a partner. Ejaculation is the action in which semen is release from the penis.

 

Causes

 

Most men ejaculate within a few minutes after onset of active thrusting in intercourse. Men with delayed ejaculation may be entirely unable to ejaculate in some circumstances (for example, during intercourse), or may only be able to ejaculate with great effort and after prolonged intercourse (for example 30 to 45 minutes).

Delayed ejaculation can result from psychological or physical causes.

Common psychological causes include:

 

• A strict religious background causing the person to view sex as sinful
  
• Lack of attraction for a partner
  
• Conditioning caused by unique or atypical masturbation patterns
  
• Traumatic events (such as being discovered in masturbation or illicit sex, or learning one's partner is having an affair)
  

Some factors, such as anger toward the partner, may be involved.

Physical causes may include:

 

• Use of certain drugs (such as prozac, mellaril, and guanethidine)
  
• Neurological disease such as a stroke or nerve damage to the spinal cord or back
  

 

Exams and Tests

 

Stimulation of the penis with a vibrator or other stimulatory device may determine if an underlying physical (often neurological) problem exists. A neurological examination may uncover other nerve problems associated with delayed ejaculation.

 

Treatment

 

If the man has never ejaculated through any form of stimulation (such as wet dreams, masturbation, or intercourse), a urologist should be consulted to determine if there is a congenital or physical cause.

If, however, he is able to ejaculate in a reasonable period of time by some form of stimulation, he should seek sex therapy from a therapist specializing in ejaculatory problems. Treatment usually includes both partners. The therapist will usually educate the couple about the fundamentals of sexual response and how to communicate and guide the partner to provide ideal stimulation, rather than trying to make a sexual response occur.

Therapy commonly involves a series of homework assignments wherein the couple, in the privacy of their home, engage in sexual activities that reduce performance pressure and focus on pleasure.

Typically, sexual intercourse will be prohibited for a limited period of time, while the couple gradually enhances their ability to enjoy ejaculation through other types of stimulation.

In cases where there is a problematic relationship or an inhibition of sexual desire between the couple, therapy to enhance the relationship and emotional intimacy may be required as a preliminary step.

Sometimes hypnosis may be a useful adjunct to therapy, particularly if a partner is not willing to participate in therapy. Self-treatment of this problem will probably be unsuccessful in most cases.

If a medication is believed to be the cause of the problem, other medication options may be discussed. (Never stop taking any medicine without first talking to your doctor.) This may be difficult in certain instances, especially when the medication is working appropriately to solve a pre-existing medical or psychological problem.

 

Outlook (Prognosis)

 

Outpatient treatment commonly requires about 12 - 18 sessions with an average success rate in the range of 70 - 80%.

A more positive outcome is associated with having a previous history of satisfying sexual experiences, a short duration of the problem, feelings of sexual desire, feelings of love toward one's sexual partner, motivation for treatment, and absence of serious psychological problems.

If medications are causing the problem, your health care provider may recommond switching or stopping the medicine (if possible). A full recovery is possible if this can be done.

 

Possible Complications

 

Marital stress, sexual dissatisfaction, inhibited sexual desire, and avoidance of sexual contact may result if the problem is not addressed and remedied. If pregnancy is desired, sperm may have to be collected using other methods because of the lack of ejaculation.

 

Prevention

 

Healthy attitudes toward sexuality and one's own genitals helps prevent delayed ejaculation. It is also vitally important to realize that you cannot will a sexual response, just as you cannot will yourself to go to sleep or to perspire. The harder one tries to have a certain sexual response, the more it becomes inhibited.

To minimize the pressure, a man should absorb himself in the pleasure of the moment, without worrying about whether or when he will ejaculate. The partner should create a relaxed atmosphere, free of pressure, rather than create pressure with questions about whether or not ejaculation has occurred. Finally, any fears or anxieties, such as fear of pregnancy or disease, should be openly discussed.

 

Alternative Names

 

Ejaculatory incompetence; Sex - delayed ejaculation; Retarded ejaculation; Anorgasmia

 

References

 

Lue TF, Broderick GA. Evaluation and management of erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation. In: Wein AJ, ed. Campbell-Walsh Urology. 9th ed. Philadelphia, Pa: Saunders Elsevier; 2007:chap 22.

Moore DP, Jefferson JW. Erectile dysfunction. In: Moore DP, Jefferson JW, eds. Handbook of Medical Psychiatry. 2nd ed. Philadelphia, Pa: Mosby Elsevier; 2004:chap 100.

Moore DP, Jefferson JW. Inhibited male orgasm. In: Moore DP, Jefferson JW, eds. Handbook of Medical Psychiatry. 2nd ed. Philadelphia, Pa: Mosby Elsevier; 2004:chap 102.

 

Update Date: 9/22/2009

 

Updated by: Linda J. Vorvick, MD, Medical Director, MEDEX Northwest Division of Physician Assistant Studies, University of Washington, School of Medicine; Louis S. Liou, MD, PhD, Assistant Professor of Urology, Department of Surgery, Boston University School of Medicine. Also reviewed by David Zieve, MD, MHA, Medical Director, A.D.A.M., Inc.

[Jeff1962]

Jeff.. turn the table around... let's say you were quick to orgasm.. but you had to work 'overtime' to make her climax... I doubt you'd want sex as often... you probably would masterbate more often...

 

 

Sometimes people rather masturbate because sex play is too much time consuming.. or physically exhausting..

 

I don't think she views sex as WORK. I can understand her feelings. I would be frustrated as well. Masturbation on her part? HAHAHAHAHA. She says that's gross. She thinks that when I do it, it's gross. I've encouraged her to explore this, no way on her part. NO WAY!

 

Some things have changed since my last post.

 

I tried talking to her this morning about our issues. I mentioned that I need to mix things up a little. She got totally pissed at me.

 

The way I am feeling right now is pure sadness, mixed with the realization that I might be faced with a choice that will tear me apart. All I did was be openly honest and non judgemental or critical with her this morning. I explained that I need to mix things up a bit. I do not think that telling your partner that sometimes her getting on top or vaginal intercourse doggie style, or a 69 would be a turn on as asking too much. I have to mention these things because they just do not happen in bed, it does not flow like this. She got pissed and said, "so you're bored sexually!" I tried to explain. I mentioned that fact that we used to do these things and that they really turned her on. She told me that she only did them because she was younger and insecure in our relationship. She said that SHE DOES NOT LIKE THESE THINGS. I felt like a total fool. Like I have never felt before in my whole life.

 

Now I feel like a piece of **** sexually and emotionally. My heart does not feel very good right now and I don't feel like much of a man. I'm filled with sadness, regret, anger and frustration.

 

I've come to the realization that our relationship might not work. That my wife might not be the woman that I am supposed to spend the rest of my life with. These thoughts really hurt me. I cannot force things or pressure. This would not be right.

 

I am still going to improve myself as a man for me. At this exact point in time, I don't even know if I see my wife in the future picture. I'm starting to realize that there might be another, more sexually compatable woman out there for me . I really do not want to face this choice, I really don't because I love her with all my heart. It would be really hard to see her move on someday with another man. Right now, I don't think that I'm going to have much of a choice.

 

Thank you for listening.

[Lizzie60]

I don't think she views sex as WORK. I can understand her feelings. I would be frustrated as well. Masturbation on her part? HAHAHAHAHA. She says that's gross. She thinks that when I do it, it's gross. I've encouraged her to explore this, no way on her part. NO WAY!

 

Some things have changed since my last post.

 

I tried talking to her this morning about our issues. I mentioned that I need to mix things up a little. She got totally pissed at me.

 

The way I am feeling right now is pure sadness, mixed with the realization that I might be faced with a choice that will tear me apart. All I did was be openly honest and non judgemental or critical with her this morning. I explained that I need to mix things up a bit. I do not think that telling your partner that sometimes her getting on top or vaginal intercourse doggie style, or a 69 would be a turn on as asking too much. I have to mention these things because they just do not happen in bed, it does not flow like this. She got pissed and said, "so you're bored sexually!" I tried to explain. I mentioned that fact that we used to do these things and that they really turned her on. She told me that she only did them because she was younger and insecure in our relationship. She said that SHE DOES NOT LIKE THESE THINGS. I felt like a total fool. Like I have never felt before in my whole life.

 

Now I feel like a piece of **** sexually and emotionally. My heart does not feel very good right now and I don't feel like much of a man. I'm filled with sadness, regret, anger and frustration.

 

I've come to the realization that our relationship might not work. That my wife might not be the woman that I am supposed to spend the rest of my life with. These thoughts really hurt me. I cannot force things or pressure. This would not be right.

 

I am still going to improve myself as a man for me. At this exact point in time, I don't even know if I see my wife in the future picture. I'm starting to realize that there might be another, more sexually compatable woman out there for me . I really do not want to face this choice, I really don't because I love her with all my heart. It would be really hard to see her move on someday with another man. Right now, I don't think that I'm going to have much of a choice.

 

Thank you for listening.

 

 

Maybe masturbation is not her thing.. I wasn't talking specifically about her.. but people in general.. (men and women)... when sex is too much work.. they rather masturbate.. for a quick release..

 

I think people try hard to find 'excuses' or 'reasons' for low libido.. what if there is NONE... what if she just got tired of it.. now that the 'honeymoon' (passion) is over..

 

We can't all love sex the same way... some like it more than others.. I used to 'hate' it with my first ex.. but as soon as I separated from my second ex (the sex was great with him btw, 7-10 times a week, we were like rabbits).. I went on the worst sexual rampage in history...

 

I still love sex.. but I can understand when being with the same person for ages.. it does get boring.. I don't care how much people say we have to 'work' on it, so that it stays fresh and passionate.. it JUST DOESN'T.. That's life..

 

In your case, Jeff.. I don't think it will change.. sorry for being so honest.. but I sincerely think that you either will have to leave her.. or get it outside.. or just masturbate (90%) for the rest of your life.. Sorry but you don't have much choice at this stage...

 

Counselling won't help... it's a waste of money and time.. IMO (for most couples)..

 

I feel sorry for you.. I really do...

 

Oh.. btw.. this butternut... reminds me of one of our regular (female) bully... just a thought..

[Toodamnpragmatic]

and lasted a long long time on occasion... TMI on my part:rolleyes:.... Your wife seems incredibly insecure as you are the one asking for sex, she is exploding in orgasm and upset you are not climaxing immediately. How long are you lasting..... 10 minutes, 25 minutes, 45 minutes of continual pumping (sorry to be blunt)? If so, I can see her issue, as a man having to work so long with a female (i.e. 30+ minutes of actual intercourse or cunnilingus, would be work).... Though I have not heard many men hear use that as an excuse....

 

Do I have to jump to conclusion and say your spouse is probably not an "enthusiastic" participant in making sure your pleasure is met?

 

How about her having multiple orgasms, or resting and then starting up again???

 

I think it is all about insecurity about sex and your relationship, though she should 100% understand the importance placed on it.

 

I laugh thinking about an 18 year old on this site Mahatma and his questions about sex (see that section in LS). He would go on about his control (or inability to orgasm) and his marathons with his girlfriend...... Geez he went on and on......

[Lizzie60]

I forgot to mention.. she could also be simply a 'lazy' lover.. (or plain lazy)

[Toodamnpragmatic]

I forgot to mention.. she could also be simply a 'lazy' lover.. (or plain lazy)

 

Yea, I was thinking that....

 

Also to correct my post above and add....

 

How long are you lasting??? 10 minutes, 25 minutes, 45 minutes of continual pumping (sorry to be blunt)? If so, I can see her issue, as a man having to work so long with a female (i.e. 30+ minutes of continual actual intercourse or oral, would be work).... Though I have not heard many men here use that as an excuse....

 

Do I have to jump to conclusion and say your spouse is probably not an "enthusiastic" participant in making sure your pleasure is met? I will bet no oral on her part to get you close to completion?

 

If you are taking a ridiculously wrong, then Buttnutter100 is right.

[jennie-jennie]

Buttnutter100:

"A man shows a woman he loves her by satisfying her sexually."

 

I agree with this. What I want from the man I love is sex and attention. An additional plus would be a man who provides for me and gives me nice gifts. Forget the rest. I want a man, not a mouse.

[Lizzie60]

Buttnutter100:

"A man shows a woman he loves her by satisfying her sexually."

 

I agree with this. What I want from the man I love is sex and attention. An additional plus would be a man who provides for me and gives me nice gifts. Forget the rest. I want a man, not a mouse.

 

 

The best of the best is when a man gives you great sex..and attention... and gives nice gift$... and even better is when you have 'several' men like that..

[Jeff1962]

Yea, I was thinking that....

 

Also to correct my post above and add....

 

How long are you lasting??? 10 minutes, 25 minutes, 45 minutes of continual pumping (sorry to be blunt)? If so, I can see her issue, as a man having to work so long with a female (i.e. 30+ minutes of continual actual intercourse or oral, would be work).... Though I have not heard many men here use that as an excuse....

 

Do I have to jump to conclusion and say your spouse is probably not an "enthusiastic" participant in making sure your pleasure is met? I will bet no oral on her part to get you close to completion?

 

If you are taking a ridiculously wrong, then Buttnutter100 is right.

 

To be honest. The last 2 times there was no oral on her part toward me before or after. I can understand after her orgasm and after being inside her that she might be turned off a bit or not into it anymore. I've even offered to wash up. Here I am, left with a pounding hardon and I'm like WTF is this crap?! My stamina? Depends on how turned on I am. There have been a few times that we BOTH climaxed at the same time, probably 2-3 minutes into intercourse. At times, I last a solid 30 minutes from the start of intercourse. Like I said, this depends on how turned on I am. I even stop in the middle, go down again just to drive her crazy. Make her wait to orgasm. She tells me that I am driving her crazy and I can tell that I am because of the swelling of her clit and other physical reactions. Sometimes I don't feel as if I get the attention or passion that I give. All I can do right now is shake my head.

 

Just to make sure, I am going to see my doctor. I think my issues involve quite a bit of the issues that I've shared but I am going to make sure of this.

 

Thank you.

[Lizzie60]

To be honest. The last 2 times there was no oral on her part toward me before or after. I can understand after her orgasm and after being inside her that she might be turned off a bit or not into it anymore. I've even offered to wash up. Here I am, left with a pounding hardon and I'm like WTF is this crap?! My stamina? Depends on how turned on I am. There have been a few times that we BOTH climaxed at the same time, probably 2-3 minutes into intercourse. At times, I last a solid 30 minutes from the start of intercourse. Like I said, this depends on how turned on I am. I even stop in the middle, go down again just to drive her crazy. Make her wait to orgasm. She tells me that I am driving her crazy and I can tell that I am because of the swelling of her clit and other physical reactions. Sometimes I don't feel as if I get the attention or passion that I give. All I can do right now is shake my head.

 

Just to make sure, I am going to see my doctor. I think my issues involve quite a bit of the issues that I've shared but I am going to make sure of this.

 

Thank you.

 

Humm... this doesn't make sense to me... I would bet my life that she fakes her orgasms.. honestly...

 

Women who are very 'sexually excited' and love sex.. are rarely reaching orgasm that quick...(average time is between 10 to 20 minutes) and since she hates it... methink she puts up a 'show' to end it as soon as possible.. and it annoys her that you take so much time..

[Jeff1962]

Maybe masturbation is not her thing.. I wasn't talking specifically about her.. but people in general.. (men and women)... when sex is too much work.. they rather masturbate.. for a quick release..

 

I think people try hard to find 'excuses' or 'reasons' for low libido.. what if there is NONE... what if she just got tired of it.. now that the 'honeymoon' (passion) is over..

 

We can't all love sex the same way... some like it more than others.. I used to 'hate' it with my first ex.. but as soon as I separated from my second ex (the sex was great with him btw, 7-10 times a week, we were like rabbits).. I went on the worst sexual rampage in history...

 

I still love sex.. but I can understand when being with the same person for ages.. it does get boring.. I don't care how much people say we have to 'work' on it, so that it stays fresh and passionate.. it JUST DOESN'T.. That's life..

 

In your case, Jeff.. I don't think it will change.. sorry for being so honest.. but I sincerely think that you either will have to leave her.. or get it outside.. or just masturbate (90%) for the rest of your life.. Sorry but you don't have much choice at this stage...

 

Counselling won't help... it's a waste of money and time.. IMO (for most couples)..

 

I feel sorry for you.. I really do...

 

Oh.. btw.. this butternut... reminds me of one of our regular (female) bully... just a thought..

 

I appreciate your honesty.

 

I cannot bring myself to search outside our marriage. I have considered this before. I do not intentionally place myself in these situations but I've had many chances out of the clear blue. I have not acted on any of these chances. I just cannot betray my wife. She means a lot to me.

 

One can only masturbate for so long. Lol.

[Jeff1962]

Humm... this doesn't make sense to me... I would bet my life that she fakes her orgasms.. honestly...

 

Women who are very 'sexually excited' and love sex.. are rarely reaching orgasm that quick...(average time is between 10 to 20 minutes) and since she hates it... methink she puts up a 'show' to end it as soon as possible.. and it annoys her that you take so much time..

 

I do not find this to be true about her orgasms. Not at all. She's not like this. I can tell that they are real.

[Lizzie60]

I appreciate your honesty.

 

I cannot bring myself to search outside our marriage. I have considered this before. I do not intentionally place myself in these situations but I've had many chances out of the clear blue. I have not acted on any of these chances. I just cannot betray my wife. She means a lot to me.

 

One can only masturbate for so long. Lol.

 

I know.. but trust me.. if a situation arises and a beautiful, sexy lady comes your way... I'm not sure you will be that 'strong'.. mind you.. I won't blame you..