I would appreciate very much your comments

[Roda]

Hi friend,

 

My girl friend has two children which are not mine but from another guy. We went to the same university where we met each other. She let me know that she wanted something with me, but at that moment I was not interested for various factors. She then decided to go with another guy to forget me, I believe, since I told her I was not interested. The wronfg thing about this is that she was not at interested in this guy. She got pregnant and the guy told her to remove the child. She didn't go for it and I feeling somehow guilty i decided to go steady with her. But to be sincere that steady at moment was not a steady thing for me, but more that I wanted to protect her. In this way almost three years passed by. I then became ill and desapeared from the scene, but she was already acting strange a hand full of months strange with me. She called but was like how are you and by. Because I could not reach her personally and she never came by, she then told me she was again pregnant from the same guy and had decided to make a life with him. But during my illness I understood how much I missed her and that I loved her. Of course this was a stick to my heart, but again it could be my own fault. I started talking with her again to find out that guy had told her again to remove the child and again she objected. He was paying for the care of their daughter and started telling her he had no money for some things and started to act aggressive verbally against her, because she stopped having sex with him. Seeing this, and I finally understanding that I loved her I told her that I would like to take care of her and the children.

 

Not because what I told her, but she had already in some way decided to get away from this a*****e, but to also stay away from me. I finally convinced her to be with me and we have together for a year now. From the beginning I told her that I didn't want that guy close to any of the three of them and she agreed. But during the year we have been really together she told me that her daughter asked for him and wanted to see him. I told her i don't agree and that a Child of three years will very soon forget about him, if she doesn't see him anymore.

 

The problem started when she accepted money from him through a sister in law. I told her didn't want want that to happen anymore and that would give him power to demand some things on the children. She didn't want to agree but at the end she agreed to take nothing more from him. Our daughter birthday is today and we had arranged that this year we would keep it small due to our financial problems and she agreed. Again behind my back she her sister in law accepted from the father to do a big thing and she didn't tell me anything till last Friday, were i got completely pissed off. The worst thing is that she told me that she was going to let him see the children and take care of them because he loves them.

 

My question is: how can someone that requested to kill them, in both cases, before they were born love them? I have been trying to tell my girlfriend, who I wanted to be my wife, that this guy is completely a bad influence for the children and us, but she keeps telling me that he has changed and I keep telling her the same way he changed both times that she was with him. But she doesn't get it.

 

Now i told her that if she goes ahead with her plan of letting him seeing and taking care of the children, with a great pain in my heart I will leave her. I don't want to take care of the mess he will make of the children. I "rescued" her two times, but with a great pain in my heart I'm not willing to help her for a third time in a mess I'm trying to prevent her from.

 

Although she keeps telling me she loves me and I keep telling her that guy is a bad influence for the children, she doesn't want to understand it.

 

I would like to know your opinion on this matter before I take my final decision, since outsiders may have a better view.

 

And sorry for the long post.