I need a drink

[maxmuscle]

I finally told my ex to not conatact me. She was like "Wow'. I told her that it was for the best. It took a lot of courage and bravery. She told me that she still love me, but I don't know what that means. She told me that she will not be trying to contact me if she didn't miss me. I figure I am not going to pretend no more when we talk to each other on the phone. I don't like phony conversations. Wishing each other well, what you been up to, and all that other crap. There is too much feelings involved. She has not said to me directly that she wants me back. I know she probably only love me as a friend. Nothing more or nothing less. I am not going to put myself through that torture. So just like that it over! I don't know if I did the right thing because I feel like crap. I can't go back and say I made a mistake because that is going to make me look weak. Well, a toast! here's to not ever and never seeing her or speaking to her agian. I am going to hit the bar..............

 

Any comments?

[InLoKo]

I'm sad for you. I know what it feels like. I would just say one thing: Men often seem to think it is a sign of weakness to change their minds. I actually think it's a sign of strength. It's weak to stick to a decision even when you think it's the wrong one. If, in a few days/weeks you really feel you have made the wrong decsion, tell her so. She'll respect you far more for it (speaking as a female).

[maxmuscle]

InLoKo,

 

Why do she say she still love me and misse me, but I don't get the sense that she wants to get back together? So why bother?

[InLoKo]

I haven't said she still loves you and misses you.

[maxmuscle]

InLoKo,

 

She said it! My ex told me she still love me and misse me so what does it all mean if i don't feel that she wants to get back together?

[InLoKo]

My apologies, I mis-read what you put. She probably says she loves and misses you because she does. Have you posted your full story somewhere? I feel like I am diving in at the end and I can't really give an accurate opinion on what happened.

[Kevin Kristopher]

It's crazy, I did the same thing yesterday. The stupid phony conversations, the i'll call you back but doesn't till like the next day. I told her that I couldn't talk to her for a while but didn't tell her when I would call her back. Hopefully in like a week I will feel better but I can't talk to her or see her or anything until I can get through to myself that we might never get back together and just thinking about hurts but like they say, there's plenty of fish in the sea, so hopefully i'll be able to do it.

 

It's crazy because what you've done is the same thing that i did.

[maxmuscle]

InLoKo,

 

I have no idea of my original post. All I can say is we was together for 3 years. Live together for 3 years. We had our share of problems. We struggle financially living together. It became too much for her so the lease of the apt was up and we went our seperate ways. Oh! I also found emails of hers writing to a guy in another state. I found them and comfronted her about them and she said well we was going out seperat ways anyway. I has hurt and felt betrayed. I loved her unconditionally. I don't how deep her loves run for me, but I was always there for her emotionally and unconditionally.

 

 

Kevin,

 

It pure hell prentending to be happy while you talking to your ex. It sucks! So I don't want no more part of it! She intiatred the break-up so why shouold I have to be theone to chase her to ask for a second chance? She says she love me and misses me, but are you willing to come back to me? She has not mentioned it and I am not going to either.

[maxmuscle]

InLoKo ,

 

I have no idea of my original post. All I can say is that we've been together for 3 years and live together for three years. We had our share of relationship problems. We struggled financially and decided to treminate the lease on our apt. We argue just like the typical couple. We made up and said we love each other. I gues she was not happy with her life being 26 with a high school diploma. She mentioned that to me a couple of times. I have my MBA from a division one program. We was both struggling to make ends meet. I was unemployed trying to find work. She was trying to get into a junior college. I aslo found her emails that she printed out talking to some guy from another state. She told me that we was going our seperate ways anyway. I was hurt, devasted, betrayed and confuse but what can i do? She initated the break-up so why should I be the one trying to get back to gether with her despite she telling me that she love me and missed me?

 

 

Kevin,

 

 

Yeah, its pure hell trying to pretend to be happy while talkin to your ex. I am not over her, therefore, my feeling are still at peak level. So why bother with all the mumbo jumbo because it is not getting my feelings any where. She say she love me and miss me us being a family. But my gut feeling say if I ask her to get back together she would crush me by saying I am not at the point yet, then what do I do?

[maxmuscle]

InLoKo ,

 

I have no idea of my original post. All I can say is that we've been together for 3 years and live together for three years. We had our share of relationship problems. We struggled financially and decided to treminate the lease on our apt. We argue just like the typical couple. We made up and said we love each other. I gues she was not happy with her life being 26 with a high school diploma. She mentioned that to me a couple of times. I have my MBA from a division one program. We was both struggling to make ends meet. I was unemployed trying to find work. She was trying to get into a junior college. I aslo found her emails that she printed out talking to some guy from another state. She told me that we was going our seperate ways anyway. I was hurt, devasted, betrayed and confuse but what can i do? She initated the break-up so why should I be the one trying to get back to gether with her despite she telling me that she love me and missed me?

 

 

Kevin,

 

 

Yeah, its pure hell trying to pretend to be happy while talkin to your ex. I am not over her, therefore, my feeling are still at peak level. So why bother with all the mumbo jumbo because it is not getting my feelings any where. She say she love me and miss me us being a family. But my gut feeling say if I ask her to get back together she would crush me by saying I am not at the point yet, then what do I do?

[Errol]

she is seeing someone else and she wants out of the relationship. she might still love you. she might miss certain things about being with you, but she made a choice. just because she still has feelings does not mean that those feelings are strong enough to overcome whatever problems the two of you had, or whatever other feelings she has developed for this other guy.

 

it hurts but you can't "get her back" if she doesn't want to be with you, and why would you want to be with someone who doesn't love you the way you love her? Trying to love enough for the both of you is only going to hurt you more in the end.

[Errol]

I got interrupted before I finished my last post. I wanted to add that I'll join you for that drink! I'm heading for liquer as soon as I get outta here today. My New Year is NOT starting out well! (I did drink a glass of water at 12:05 on New Years and raised my glass to all you LS'rs.) Then I went down the street and watched the fire department put out the car fire that the neighborhood kids set.

[maxmuscle]

Errol,

 

Well, after I told her to not contact me yesterday, she called me the same night to talk me. She told me she still love me. We talked for about an hour. She is going to call me again tonite. I basically laid it out on the line and told her how I feel and she calls me back saying she still love me. I told myself if she doesn't call me this weekend that I was going to move on, but she calls back that same day. Now, I know her love is still there. (I think)