cugo999 Posted January 3, 2004 Share Posted January 3, 2004 It has been three weeks since I talked to my ex. She hang up on me the last time we talked coz she was mad about this secret she told me and I let go. I have tried to keep the no contact thing. Three times she has called me, but each time I pick the phone there is always a silence the other end. I can see her number on my caller id. I don't know what to make out of this. I wonder if by mistake she dialed my number. Should I call her back or just keep strong and move on. I still love her so much. Thanks for your advice Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted January 3, 2004 Share Posted January 3, 2004 This is all part of the letting go process. Move on and don't look back. Don't return her calls unless she leaves a message. You let go a secret so she could no longer trust you anyway...even if she wanted to get back with you. Where there's no trust there can be no relationship. Learn to keep secrets and you'll be better off. There are lots of nice gals out there. Get through the healing process now and then go for it. Link to post Share on other sites
befuddled11 Posted January 3, 2004 Share Posted January 3, 2004 Surely if you she was your girlfriend, she'd know whether or not you have Caller ID, no? Kinda weird that she's doing that......considering you'd *think* she knows you can see her # on your caller ID. But maybe she doesn't know? Sometimes people do this.....after breaking up with someone (or being broken up with)......it's crazy but still.....sometimes they just want to hear the other person's voice again.......or maybe they have intentions of talking but just can't get up the nerve. If I were you, next time she does it, call her back and ask her what's up.....tell her you saw her # on your caller ID. People make mistakes. So you divulged a secret (not sure how serious of a secret)...maybe she is ready to forgive you for this and start over but doesn't know how to go about talking to you again? Link to post Share on other sites
Author cugo999 Posted January 3, 2004 Author Share Posted January 3, 2004 befuddled11, tonny, she doesn't know I have a caller ID. When we last talked, she never said it was over between us. Sometimes I think probably she wants me to call so I may apologise. I was not happy with the first time I tried to explain to her what actually happen. If you read my previous post you will know what kind of a secret it was. I don't plan to initiate no conversation right now. If she trully wants to forgive me, she will call. May be next time she call again, I might just call her by name and see what will happen. I can feel it, she wants to start talking. You see two weeks ago, I could have loved to talk to her. She took too long. I am now ok and I feel I can give her more time to see if what I said is worth breaking our friendship. I am sure I can move on now without her, eventhough I still love her. A week from now, if nothing happens, I am sure I'll call it quits. More advice , thanks Link to post Share on other sites
befuddled11 Posted January 3, 2004 Share Posted January 3, 2004 Okay, so I read your old post, the one in which you explained the "secret" you divulged. I have to say, I can definitely understand why she'd be unimpressed with you for going to these people she didn't like (for her own reasons), and telling them the things she'd said about them, in confidence to you. After learning all this, they went and confronted her. That was likely embarassing and awkward and uncomfortable for her. While your intentions were to help them all "patch things up", it still really wasn't your place, I don't think, to get involved and tell them things she'd said/felt about them. Can you understand why she'd be upset and feel betrayed?? I think you do owe her an apology.......to explain to her WHY you did what you did, that you were really just trying to help. Why don't you just write her an email apologizing ....and then leave it at that. People want to be in a relationship with someone they feel they can really trust.....who won't go and divulge their "secrets" to others. You say you love her, she probably still loves you, and misses you (or she wouldn't be calling your house like she's doing). Life is short. Why not just talk to her and get it all out in the open and apologize.......and then at least you can go from there? Link to post Share on other sites
Author cugo999 Posted January 3, 2004 Author Share Posted January 3, 2004 befuddled11 , I wanted to give her time to cool down. At the sametime I don't wanna bring that 'bad feeling ' I had when she was not talking tyo me. What if I write to her, explain my self, apologise and all that, and then she take another 3 weeks with no word, what am I gonna do. Well,I'll give her few more days and then I'll hand write a letter to her to apologise and seef what is next. If she can't accept it, then I'll have to move on. Thanks for your advice Link to post Share on other sites
Grace Posted January 3, 2004 Share Posted January 3, 2004 She's calling you cause she wants to hear your voice and is obviously missing you. If she knows you have caller ID, she's hoping you'll call her back and she'll probably make up some excuse like "Oh, I didn't call you on purpose" when really she did. She doesn't want to give in first and is hoping you will. I don't know what happened between you two in the relationship, but if she's playing little baby games like calling and hanging up, are you sure that's someone you really want to be with. That's not love, that's manipulation. Link to post Share on other sites
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