Tre Posted January 3, 2004 Share Posted January 3, 2004 During my 4 year stint at university I had a long term relationship with a Japanese girl. She was an exchange student and after 3 years had to return to her country. We were very much in love and I truly believed that we would marry someday. To cut a long story short I had to remain in the UK for 1 year to finish my degree while she was in Japan. I was confident we could cope with this separation. I loved her so much and she loved me I know. I then planned to go to Japan to be with her. As the year passed the relationship went downhill. Phone calls were expensive, she was busy and life was changing for her with a new job and new friends etc in Tokyo. After a while she broke up with me and said she had a new guy. I know this sounds cocky but I know she still loves me. I have always thought that we were meant to be together. I stopped contact with her and after 1 month of silence I got a call. She said she loved me and that she wanted me to go to japan now. So I got a ticket and was on the next plain out there. When I arrived she tells me she does not love me and she is with a second new bloke now. I have now been in Japan for 3 weeks and over that time we have been getting on better although she still says I am not her boyfriend. She says she loves me and that she is thinking of getting back with me. But, she says she wants to see if she likes this new bloke first before getting back with me. I have told her that when I go back next week on the plane I want this situation sorted out one way or the other. She wants me to wait maybe a month to see what happens with this guy. I love her so so much you would not believe it. Even after all this time. I want her back - she is the only girl for me. My heart says wait for her but my head says ditch her. She has treated me quite badly and abused my love over the last 6 months messing me about and 1 minuite she loves me the next minute she doesnt. Her family get on great with me and they want us to stay together. They think she loves me and will soon realise that we should be together. What am I going to do. This is all I think about - I have got to get her back. But I have to sort this out coz its not like she lives next door. If she wants me I have to leave my country. Link to post Share on other sites
princess75 Posted January 3, 2004 Share Posted January 3, 2004 Ok, this is sounding to complicated. I would not wait for her, I would do my things. I know it is hard, and not easy. For what you say you have done your part, have even gone to Japan to see her. I dont think it is fair she is going out with another boy just to try. I would definitely go away from her if I were you...no matter how hard it seems. Look, she can be yours maybe , but you need to show your importance...not be there like a doormat. You have done your part, if I were you I would ask her to marry you and let her decide. Put the ball in her court, if she does not reply for yes, you are better off alone. If she says no, then you already know. I kno it is hard, you think timing is important..but here she is talkign about another man. And do you want to be the one wedding her? Come on, put your cards, ask her to marry but let her reply. Whatever she says stick to it, and do your life with or witohut her! Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 How many new guys will she 'want to see if she likes' before she finally decides? What if she chooses you and then another new guy comes along that she thinks she might like? It sounds as though she thinks there might be somebody better, but if she doesn't find him right away, she'll 'settle' for you. Drop her and find somebody whose first choice you are. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts