just_some_guy Posted February 17, 2010 Share Posted February 17, 2010 My W is a confirmed food addict, to the point of self-destruction. She's been on a diet to drop some weight so that she can have weight loss surgery more safely. While she's been sticking to it fairly well for a few weeks, she is always pushing food on me, buying me candy, cookies and stuff that I don't need to eat. I have my own minor overweight to deal with, but I manage it with exercise and trying to eat right. But it makes it hard with her pushing things on me. If I'm browsing around the house for dinner, she is always saying, "well you could have some...." whatever is around. Or the "I got you some special cookie dough to bake up" and she's bought something from the store that neither of us should eat. Or if we eat out, she pushes things on the menu on me. I've heard of alcoholics that do similar things with their spouses who are not alcoholic and can still have a drink or a glass of wine sometimes. Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted February 17, 2010 Share Posted February 17, 2010 I wouldn't compare food addiction with alcoholism. IMO, as a person who has quite a bit of experience with addiction issues - the substance of choice is not the issue. There are reasons why people become addicted to the things they become addicted to. Food is a very complex addiction, because unlike alcohol, or cigarettes, or heroin - you need to eat food to live. You can't just quit cold turkey. I think that food addicts tend to have underlying issues, where they associate food and eating with specific emotions that allow them to associate the feeling of physical fullness with emotional satiation. While I am not a food addict and am of normal weight, I do the same things for people I love. I always have a specific brand of yogurt in the fridge for my son, for example. In my family, and my mother's culture of origin, you offer food to be hospitable, and to show affection (there is not so much physical affection in her culture). Just some..."food for thought" no pun intended. Link to post Share on other sites
threebyfate Posted February 17, 2010 Share Posted February 17, 2010 Sit her down and just say to her "Stop suggesting food to me. Stop pushing me to eat. It's ramping up to the point of destructive annoyance and counterproductive to our relationship". Link to post Share on other sites
laRubiaBonita Posted February 17, 2010 Share Posted February 17, 2010 some parents live through the lives of their kids... and some addicts use through their loved ones. it may not be totally intentional... especially if she is dieting and restricting her eating right now. but if it bugs you tell her to stop. Better yet- why not eat dinner WITH her; make the meal together and even go shopping together? Link to post Share on other sites
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