jazzybee Posted February 25, 2010 Share Posted February 25, 2010 We have been going out for around 4 months now, hes at uni and I am working at home 50 odd miles away from him. I know that uni life is always busy and he always has assignments to do, but it feels like sometimes he doesnt bother to call me or txt me very much and when i phone him he is the one who has to go because he is so busy! When i went to go and visit him for the 3rd time for a weekend trip, I drove 50+ miles to go and see him and all we did was watch the football, he also seemed very reserved aswell. When I asked him about it he said that he doesnt feel comfortable acting all lovey dovey in public and its just the way he is. Sometimes we dont see eachother for 3 weeks or so and whenever I ask for him to come and visit me he just makes up excuses. We also had an argument over TEXT (how lame) last night because I wanted to know why he was acting like it and if he was just using me for the status and he got all sarcastic on me and basically saying that i never call or text him and I am not very chatty when we are together. Why should I call him when he never bothers with me??? Someone help me Link to post Share on other sites
Imnotsure Posted February 25, 2010 Share Posted February 25, 2010 Are you the one who usually starts the conversations? I always find myself feeling a little under appreciated when this happens. Also if I try to force conversation upon my partner I find she's a little unresponsive. I know it sounds a little childish but if you give him some space then maybe he will initiate them with you. You obviously sound like you care a lot about him, but you need to remember that people like a little mystery in their partners. If you are having arguments a lot then I suggest you give him some space. Engaging him further when he is already agitated will do you no favors. I know it often feels like you should be messaging him lots to try and "make up" after a fight but you want to just give them a little room. Try to keep your conversations short and sweet. It's better to have a short meaningful conversation and leave him wanting more than to drag it out until you've got silence. Take all my advice with a pinch of salt obviously, don't go about giving the cold shoulder and being unresponsive. Just try and give him the opportunity to miss you. I hope this helps a little bit, let us know a little more about your situation and I'll try to give you some better advice. Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
Author jazzybee Posted February 25, 2010 Author Share Posted February 25, 2010 hey sometimes he starts conversations and he has sent me quite a lot of drunk texts saying "I miss you" and stuff like that and asking how i am. He is generally a laid back person but it feels like he is tooo laid back and it feels like a huge gap is missing (probably the amount of miles between us)...i just dont know whether to end it or to sort it, but when i did try and sort it it just ended up being an argument..... Link to post Share on other sites
Sparkling Posted February 26, 2010 Share Posted February 26, 2010 hey sometimes he starts conversations and he has sent me quite a lot of drunk texts saying "I miss you" and stuff like that and asking how i am. He is generally a laid back person but it feels like he is tooo laid back and it feels like a huge gap is missing (probably the amount of miles between us)...i just dont know whether to end it or to sort it, but when i did try and sort it it just ended up being an argument..... He has time to get drunk 'a lot', but not enough time to spend talking to you without rushing off? He is too 'busy'? When you are with him, his attention isn't even on you. He can party, but... Doesn't this tell you what his priorities are? You do not come first with him. 50 miles isn't that far away, but he doesn't bother? He could even meet you somewhere half way if he wanted to but he doesn't. Does he ask you to come visit or do you just tell him you are going and show up? He isn't treating you with respect, and it sounds to me like he is stringing you along. It would do you a world of good to go hang out with friends of your own and look around for someone who is as into you as you are them. When he sent you a text you would be out doing something fun instead of waiting for him to give you a few seconds of his time. If he was into you, he would be wanting to be with you as much as you do him. I would move on if I were in your shoes. It sounds like his party time is more important to him than you. Best of luck! Link to post Share on other sites
SarahRose Posted February 26, 2010 Share Posted February 26, 2010 He has lost interest and isn't telling you and you are doing all the work. Find a guy closer to you who will really be your bf Link to post Share on other sites
Author jazzybee Posted February 26, 2010 Author Share Posted February 26, 2010 Hey guys thanks for finally making me see sense! I have broken it off with him and hope to just stay mates. Thanks again for your time xxx Link to post Share on other sites
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