cuppa Posted May 15, 2010 Share Posted May 15, 2010 I'm happy because on the doctor scale (balance) at the gym, I finally got to move the big weight over a notch to the left and the little weight is now on the right side. It's about 23 lbs since a year ago and about 18 since the beginning of the year. With all the working out, the muscle mass has increased a lot and I look a lot better than 23 lbs would account for by itself. I've had to buy new clothes a couple of times now. I feel better and my head is in a better place these days. I'm not dieting, but working on changing my habits. Nothing is "off limits" but I'm trying to consciously make better eating choices and stay in the habit of regular, vigorous but not excessive exercise. I have a donut or some chocolate once in a while, or a nice dinner out from time to time. But as a habit, I eat pretty healthy, smaller portions, etc. Since I separated, I have new dishes and I've been trying to acquire plates and bowls and so on that reflect a more realistic sense of portion sizes. Biggest change in habits is to try to have at least two, preferably three vegetables with lunch and dinner and reduce the entree size. I try to get fats from healthier sources, like avocados, olive oil and fish like sardines. Less processed foods, ie, if it comes in a wrapper, don't eat it. I saw your post before, I am like you exactly, finding a healthy lifestyle that I can maintain for the rest of my life. I only sacrifice one thing from this, that is cutting down sugar from my coffee. Everything else, I do it in moderation (eat more often, small portion) and always so conscious in eating more veggies & fruist (plus vitamin). I substitute my chocolate cravings with dark chocolate with no sugar (which to me, it tastes better than the milky one anyways ). I just want to update this thread that I've been eating 3000+ cal this week. So I thought I would for sure gain at least 4 lbs. I step on a scale today finally and it's the same weight (125 lbs!). It might be I lose some muscles (though I don't think so since I still do my push ups and sit ups). My relative who's traveling with me and eat the same greasy food, he gained 4 lbs! So yeah, I guess all those 6 months of exercise can weather 1 week of really bad/greasy food (and 1500 cals hagen Daaz Ice cream, glad I have that! ). Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted May 15, 2010 Share Posted May 15, 2010 I saw your post before, I am like you exactly, finding a healthy lifestyle that I can maintain for the rest of my life. I only sacrifice one thing from this, that is cutting down sugar from my coffee. Everything else, I do it in moderation (eat more often, small portion) and always so conscious in eating more veggies & fruist (plus vitamin). I substitute my chocolate cravings with dark chocolate with no sugar (which to me, it tastes better than the milky one anyways ). I just want to update this thread that I've been eating 3000+ cal this week. So I thought I would for sure gain at least 4 lbs. I step on a scale today finally and it's the same weight (125 lbs!). It might be I lose some muscles (though I don't think so since I still do my push ups and sit ups). My relative who's traveling with me and eat the same greasy food, he gained 4 lbs! So yeah, I guess all those 6 months of exercise can weather 1 week of really bad/greasy food (and 1500 cals hagen Daaz Ice cream, glad I have that! ). I don't mean to be rude-and please don't take this the wrong way- but it seems as though you do this quite a bit. Diet/exercise then go on junk food tyrants. That's not particularly healthy and is probably screwing up your metabolism. That's great you didn't gain weight but I think it's more about your health then weight. It's almost like you are testing your body to see if you can gain weight from all the junk. It's a wonder you aren't gaining weight but you probably are jeopordizing your health. It's great to treat yourself but going on junk food binges is not at all good for your diet. Link to post Share on other sites
Neutrino Posted May 16, 2010 Share Posted May 16, 2010 So I have avoided the junk food!!! Yay!!! I also bought these smoothie mixes that have frozen fruit in them and then you just add skim milk and put them in a blender. They are so good and they really fill you up!! I just feel so much better now that I'm not eating the junk, I lost a few pounds also! Hi LB, well done for a good start. I read your description of the nurses and their damn snacks... I think this is very selfish. I noticed that eating became a hobby or some kind of a social activity... People no longer eat the healthiest things available when hungry - they eat for fun. I live in a country where the average female clothing size is 44, the few who are fit and trim often get attitude like it is their fault that others who do not invest the effort - are not. I also have in my office two let-yourself-go colleagues who keep a jar full of cookies on the desk they share and gave me a dirty look when the Brazilian bikinis I bought online arrived... Restraining yourself to absolute terms is very demanding - I would more offer "controlled measures" : you can always have 1 small cookie (per day and no more), eat it in small bites and remind yourself that 50 gr taste exactly the same as 500 gr. Get some (sugar free) hard lollies in a flavor you like - strawberry or caramel, you can eat a few of those. If you really want to be extreme - put some ants in their jar LOL, or BS them you are allergic to processed flour and ask them to keep their shyt in their office. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted May 16, 2010 Share Posted May 16, 2010 Yes its s tough one.I must admit, I have been guilty of taking things into work when I don't want them sitting in the tins at home. I love to bake, and am quite good at it, and I love trying out new recipes, but I don't want lots of tempting high calorie treats at home, so I have been known to offload them on the work ladies or friends with kids. Sometimes MAKING the treat is more satisfying than eating it, but you do have to taste it! Lately though, I have just hung up my baking apron, as its just not worth it to me right now. Maybe I will get back into it when my daughter gets older, but even then it will be hard to resist temptation. Anyway, weigh in today, and am down another few pounds, am nearly halfway to my target weight which is great. Only downfall is that I have had a WW point deducted from my daily allowance thanks to my weight loss. was hard enough to stick to 20! Link to post Share on other sites
cuppa Posted May 16, 2010 Share Posted May 16, 2010 I don't mean to be rude-and please don't take this the wrong way- but it seems as though you do this quite a bit. Diet/exercise then go on junk food tyrants. That's not particularly healthy and is probably screwing up your metabolism. That's great you didn't gain weight but I think it's more about your health then weight. It's almost like you are testing your body to see if you can gain weight from all the junk. It's a wonder you aren't gaining weight but you probably are jeopordizing your health. It's great to treat yourself but going on junk food binges is not at all good for your diet. I wouldn't call this junk food binge. I probably have ice cream like that once every 6 month so I think it's ok. As far as 3000+ cal, it's cultural thing. I was visiting relatives overseas and they served me greasy food. I can hardly turn down this (not a good etiquette). So it's not like I went to McDonald and gorge myself with burgers & fries , the portion is moderate but the content was very fatty as the region I visited is known for farming and hence, the food tend to be high in fat and lot of carbs as these people have hard labors in their day to day. Binge means that I really want it and I can't stop myself, while in this case, I was served with rice, potatoes, intestines, pork belly, and deep fried stuff everyday. Not that I could turn it down (also I did pretty grueling stuff, I was attending 2 day funeral where I had to kneel and walk for hours and hours so in essence, I kind of need that energy & that much food maybe) Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted May 16, 2010 Share Posted May 16, 2010 I wouldn't call this junk food binge. I probably have ice cream like that once every 6 month so I think it's ok. As far as 3000+ cal, it's cultural thing. I was visiting relatives overseas and they served me greasy food. I can hardly turn down this (not a good etiquette). So it's not like I went to McDonald and gorge myself with burgers & fries , the portion is moderate but the content was very fatty as the region I visited is known for farming and hence, the food tend to be high in fat and lot of carbs as these people have hard labors in their day to day. Binge means that I really want it and I can't stop myself, while in this case, I was served with rice, potatoes, intestines, pork belly, and deep fried stuff everyday. Not that I could turn it down (also I did pretty grueling stuff, I was attending 2 day funeral where I had to kneel and walk for hours and hours so in essence, I kind of need that energy & that much food maybe) Hmm, okay maybe it is a cultural thing. I know for myself that if someone tries to serve me something that is fattening I usually politely decline and try find something healthy to eat. People never seem to care. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 Hmm, okay maybe it is a cultural thing. I know for myself that if someone tries to serve me something that is fattening I usually politely decline and try find something healthy to eat. People never seem to care. I would be highly offended and probably wouldn't ever invite you to dinner again. My H and I love to cook, and the meals we make are often just as good as a decent restaurants. When we have people to dinner we plan our menus and match the wine and generally go to a bit of effort. We also try to cater to dietary requirements (ie vegan/ vegetarian) but everyone deserves a delicious treat every now and then, so to us its all about quality and good ingredients than quantity and lots of low fat tasteless rubbish. And I am still losing weight while indulging in the odd delicious dinner. Link to post Share on other sites
cuppa Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 Hmm, okay maybe it is a cultural thing. I know for myself that if someone tries to serve me something that is fattening I usually politely decline and try find something healthy to eat. People never seem to care. yes, it's cultural thing. The food is called "hakka food". Back in the days, hakka people are mostly farmers (and poor) so really, lean meat is not something that they can afford (also farming is a hard work, they need as much as fat as they can get). As a result, the food is all oily even the vegetable dishes, they used body parts in animal that I can't think of before. My family will be horrified if I didn't eat in these family gatherings and go to restaurants, it will be considered very rude in my culture. I can eat smaller portion but funeral proceedings in hakka culture is very elaborate. We had to kneel or bows in a lot of prayers, we had to kneel and did deep bow for people who came to pay respect (and there are hundreds, if not thousands, of people). This is a family from my husband side and they are quite prominent in this town so yeah, a lot of people from all over the country flew in to pay respect. By the time we finished and got together for food, we typically were starving (and the heat, OMG, it was so hot over there too, at some point I thought I would pass out). Also the food served is according to culture. The first day, it was all vegetarian (but a lot of deep fried so not healthy either). the last day, it's all meat & local beers. It was supposed to be the celebration after grieving for days. Yeah, I wasn't raised in this culture so I'm learning as I go and the last thing I wanted to do is to offend the host during this trying period. I don't mean to brag in my previous post, I was just expecting that I would gain tons of weight after this and was overexcited when I found out that I am the same weight. Link to post Share on other sites
Neutrino Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 Hi Cuppa - I totally understand your situation - people invite you to that "dinner at home" thing and put you on the spot.... One way is to simply tell them you developed an allergy to whatever it is on your plate you'd rather not endure... I show up for dinner with BF parents carrying my own bowl with food - the first time I did it the look on their faces was absolutely priceless luckily I'm known for being eccentric, so they were not too shocked or offended when I simply explained I wished to keep to vegetarian low-carb food. I made a point of adding that sharing their company was more important than sharing their food. I have no idea what they think behind my back - but they are used to it now. As for friends, OMFG I dodged "dinner at home" with friends for a long while now, not only most people in this country eat what in nutritional term is garbage, but they then expect you to reciprocate... I don't cook because I simply hate it and the cleaning that comes afterwards is a waste of my life, so we normally make appointments for coffee or tea. To good friends I explain myself and there's no problem, and acquaintances just get the fibs of some allergy or medical condition... Link to post Share on other sites
Author hotgurl Posted May 17, 2010 Author Share Posted May 17, 2010 I would be highly offended and probably wouldn't ever invite you to dinner again. My H and I love to cook, and the meals we make are often just as good as a decent restaurants. When we have people to dinner we plan our menus and match the wine and generally go to a bit of effort. We also try to cater to dietary requirements (ie vegan/ vegetarian) but everyone deserves a delicious treat every now and then, so to us its all about quality and good ingredients than quantity and lots of low fat tasteless rubbish. And I am still losing weight while indulging in the odd delicious dinner. I agree with you. Once in a while it is ok to eat a nice meal etc.. Also like i said in certain circumstance you goal can be simple not to gain weight. On vacation I don't track and have treats but since I am doing so much exercise I never gain. Btw I lost 1 point this week too. What a reward for losing weight. Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 Hi Cuppa - I totally understand your situation - people invite you to that "dinner at home" thing and put you on the spot.... One way is to simply tell them you developed an allergy to whatever it is on your plate you'd rather not endure... I show up for dinner with BF parents carrying my own bowl with food - the first time I did it the look on their faces was absolutely priceless luckily I'm known for being eccentric, so they were not too shocked or offended when I simply explained I wished to keep to vegetarian low-carb food. I made a point of adding that sharing their company was more important than sharing their food. I have no idea what they think behind my back - but they are used to it now. As for friends, OMFG I dodged "dinner at home" with friends for a long while now, not only most people in this country eat what in nutritional term is garbage, but they then expect you to reciprocate... I don't cook because I simply hate it and the cleaning that comes afterwards is a waste of my life, so we normally make appointments for coffee or tea. To good friends I explain myself and there's no problem, and acquaintances just get the fibs of some allergy or medical condition... Yep, this is me. Unfortunately I just can't eat high fat/high carb food..I gain weight. I have already proved that multiple times. I don't take the risk. Usually there is SOMETHING I can eat that isn't fatty, like if they are serving pasta, salad, and a baked potato, I chose to take salad and a plain baked potato. If they do pressure me to eat the pasta then I will take the littleless portion I can. If people don't want to invite me back then fine, I don't want to get fat again. My friends/family understand that I eat like that so they don't ever pressure me or give me a hard time. Everyone is used to it. Link to post Share on other sites
Neutrino Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 LB - the people who don't invite you again, were probably not your target audience to begin with, this is also a good filtering system... Your true friends will understand and support you - but it is good to explain yourself to those you actually care about. I insist on not eating things (or doing anything else) against my free will just to please other people. when in a formal public place (like a work dinner) until quite recently I'd use the allergy-line (ahum - does a mental allergy count...?), although in the last couple of months in a formal environment I simply don't offer any explanations - knowing that people would feel too uncomfortable to ask... Believe me - there is nothing wrong with refusing to compromise your goals just for the sake of "what people might think" (if they even want to call it thinking...). Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 I would be highly offended and probably wouldn't ever invite you to dinner again. My H and I love to cook, and the meals we make are often just as good as a decent restaurants. When we have people to dinner we plan our menus and match the wine and generally go to a bit of effort. We also try to cater to dietary requirements (ie vegan/ vegetarian) but everyone deserves a delicious treat every now and then, so to us its all about quality and good ingredients than quantity and lots of low fat tasteless rubbish. And I am still losing weight while indulging in the odd delicious dinner. I pretty much agree. BF's brother's sister-in-law has been on a "wedding diet" for over a year now (wedding will soon be over, thank G-d!). We've taken turns over the past year inviting one another over for dinner. I've taken great pains to make sure that the meals we prepare are super healthy and lean - just for her! - and also incredibly tasty. She has refused our (my) food a couple times, saying it was against her wedding diet. (But she never refuses her future mother-in-law's food.) Admittedly, that made me mad. The last time, I suspected she might do it again, so I did something really easy and relatively inexpensive. So I made a really light-calorie, yet SUPER delicious taco salad. She brought her own bag of lettuce, and put a tablespoon of her own salsa on it, and called it dinner. She thought she was compromising by eating the same type of meal (a salsa-inspired salad?), but I was still infuriated. She could have at least tried it. Link to post Share on other sites
Canuck1979 Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 Someone here said that if they were true friends, they would understand your goal and support you. Maybe next time you could eat a small portion. You can tell them that you have an upset stomach, but would still like to have a little bit. For those who would get upset over this, get over it. When it comes to weight loss, even a small situation can ruin months of hard work and commitment. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 (edited) See thats the thing- why bother going if you aren't going to at least participate in the group activity? You can eat a smaller portion, or refuse dessert or wine, I wouldn't mind that, but inviting people over for dinner is something I take huge pleasure and pride in. Food is a passion of mine and my husbands, and if someone refused to eat our food, why would they bother coming to our house? We never serve fat laden cr*p, its always cooked fresh from scratch often with ingredients we have grown or caught ourselves. Last time we had a dinner party, the menu was fresh caught snapper with a quinoa salad, wild rabbit wrapped in pancetta with a white bean puree, and vanilla bean creme brulee with ginger snap biscuits and homemade ginger icecream. The whole thing took us the better part of two days to prepare (not to mention time catching the fish and the rabbit), so for someone to bring their OWN FOOD to our house then would have been such an insult. Fortunately most of our friends appreciate good food and the effort we have put into it. We will happily cater for someone who has dietary requirements (I have a good friend who can't eat gluten, and a few who are vegetarians) as long as they let me know in advance and actually appreciate the fact. If I knew someone was dieting, I would probably incorporate that into the menu. But if someone didn't trust me enough to do that and brought their own food anyway, then I would be insulted. (as in SGs situation) One time I slaved away nearly all day making yummy vegan food for a friends girlfriend, (with NO offer of help despite me also having WB to look after) and she barely said thank you and said that despite the salad looking unappetizing, it tasted "OK". She won't be invited back in a hurry. The only time when I was a little anal about my own food was when I was pregnant, and you have to be because of the risk of food poisoning and there are lots of things you can't eat. But I was always polite about it and people understood. Edited May 17, 2010 by sb129 Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 I understand what it is like to lose weight- I am in the middle of doing weight watchers myself. But I refuse to compromise my foods taste and quality, so if it means eating smaller portions and doing extra exercise, then thats how it will be. I don't agree that one day can ruin months of good work- I am usually good during the week and on Saturdays I will still indulge a little and have a couple of glasses of wine. I will make up for it at the gym on Sunday and I have still been losing weight. As you can see this is a bit of a hot topic for me, as its something thats P8ssed me off recently. I appreciate people wanting to lose weight etc, but its a two way street IMO- going to the extreme and denying myself anything tasty ever again just isn't my bag, and you can get what you want without offending people. Link to post Share on other sites
Canuck1979 Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 Someone here said that if they were true friends, they would understand your goal and support you. Maybe next time you could eat a small portion. You can tell them that you have an upset stomach, but would still like to have a little bit. For those who would get upset over this, get over it. When it comes to weight loss, even a small situation can ruin months of hard work and commitment. Well, if someone is bringing their own food to a dinner party, I think they're being ridiculous. If their dietary requirements are so strict, they should say something to the effect that they will join the group later in the evening. Link to post Share on other sites
Canuck1979 Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 I understand what it is like to lose weight- I am in the middle of doing weight watchers myself. But I refuse to compromise my foods taste and quality, so if it means eating smaller portions and doing extra exercise, then thats how it will be. I don't agree that one day can ruin months of good work- I am usually good during the week and on Saturdays I will still indulge a little and have a couple of glasses of wine. I will make up for it at the gym on Sunday and I have still been losing weight. As you can see this is a bit of a hot topic for me, as its something thats P8ssed me off recently. I appreciate people wanting to lose weight etc, but its a two way street IMO- going to the extreme and denying myself anything tasty ever again just isn't my bag, and you can get what you want without offending people. I understand how you would be offended. However, I still believe that one fatty meal can make the difference between attaining a weight loss goal and not attaining a weight loss goal. What if the person is a food addict? Whatever the situation, I hope that the dieter would be open, honest and tactful with the individual who invited them over. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 Sure- but you can't assume that every meal someone else cooks is going to be "fatty". Communication is the key. I still don't buy that ONE bad meal will undo a whole lot of good work. I am living proof! The whole premise of weight watchers is that you CAN indulge in "bad" foods- you just have to make up for it in other areas, like extra exercise, or cut back on other days that week. You can "save up" points if you know you are going to be going out that weekend. I am still losing weight doing it this way, and its been great to not deprive myself of all the stuff I love. Link to post Share on other sites
Canuck1979 Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 (edited) Sure- but you can't assume that every meal someone else cooks is going to be "fatty". Communication is the key. I still don't buy that ONE bad meal will undo a whole lot of good work. I am living proof! The whole premise of weight watchers is that you CAN indulge in "bad" foods- you just have to make up for it in other areas, like extra exercise, or cut back on other days that week. You can "save up" points if you know you are going to be going out that weekend. I am still losing weight doing it this way, and its been great to not deprive myself of all the stuff I love. I'm thinking as an ex-smoker. If I had ONE puff of a cigarette, I would probably start smoking again. Since food is can be an addiction, the same can apply, IMO. I think we can both agree that communication is the key. Edited May 17, 2010 by Canuck1979 Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 I'm thinking as an ex-smoker. If I had ONE puff of a cigarette, I would probably start smoking again. Since food is an addiction, the same can apply, IMO. I think we can both agree that communication is the key. Ok, see where you are going with that. Thanks for the clarification. Brings up an interesting point- if you were to invite a recovering alcoholic for dinner, would you serve wine to the other guests, or just not have any at all? What would be the correct etiquette in that situation? Usually when people come for dinner with us, someone has to drive, so there is usually one or more people not drinking- but it doesn't mean the others don't drink, but I have been for dinner at non-drinkers houses, and don't expect wine to be served....and probably if our guests were ALL non drinkers, I wouldn't drink myself either... Link to post Share on other sites
Canuck1979 Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 Ok, see where you are going with that. Thanks for the clarification. Brings up an interesting point- if you were to invite a recovering alcoholic for dinner, would you serve wine to the other guests, or just not have any at all? What would be the correct etiquette in that situation? Usually when people come for dinner with us, someone has to drive, so there is usually one or more people not drinking- but it doesn't mean the others don't drink, but I have been for dinner at non-drinkers houses, and don't expect wine to be served....and probably if our guests were ALL non drinkers, I wouldn't drink myself either... Well, that depends on the person. I would base my decision on how familiar I was with their progress. If I wasn't sure, then I would either not invite them or invite them and not serve alcohol. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 Cool. Thanks. Communication again right? Never been in that situation personally, but it could happen in the future. Link to post Share on other sites
cuppa Posted May 17, 2010 Share Posted May 17, 2010 Brings up an interesting point- if you were to invite a recovering alcoholic for dinner, would you serve wine to the other guests, or just not have any at all? I went to a wedding once where it's well known that a bride used to be alocholic and part of AA. We completely understood if there is no wine or alcohol served in the wedding. It ended up they still served alcohol, just the bride & groom drank apple cider for their toast and stayed with non alcoholic beverage all night long. This is a tough one though as it's not easy to be surrounded by drinks and people drinking in a party. I would put some non alcoholic beverage as part of the entrees and maybe have a wet bar on the side for pre-dinner and post-dinner conversation (alongside coffee + pastries for the ones who don't drink). Link to post Share on other sites
Neutrino Posted May 18, 2010 Share Posted May 18, 2010 (edited) Someone here said that if they were true friends, they would understand your goal and support you. Maybe next time you could eat a small portion. You can tell them that you have an upset stomach, but would still like to have a little bit. For those who would get upset over this, get over it. When it comes to weight loss, even a small situation can ruin months of hard work and commitment. Ya, that was me... The few people that I'm close with, are intellectually above and beyond the level of kicking up a fuss because my preference of food is different to theirs. I have explained my reasons and life philosophy to them (and also that I would love to join for a home-dinner to enjoy their company), they don't try to impose their choices on me, and I don't impose on them - because I bring my own food with me and they don't have to buy or make anything for me. FYI I'm not on a diet nor trying to loose weight - it is simply a long-term choice of a healthy life-style. I would like to add an observation I made : When people refuse food on diet grounds - they sometimes get angry responses (see some examples here) from those making or serving the food, however - when people refuse food on religious grounds - nobody EVER says anything back.... Just food for thought ! Edited May 18, 2010 by Neutrino Link to post Share on other sites
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