Jump to content

How to deal with rejection


Recommended Posts

I am so hurt right now, I finally got the courage to tell my best friend that I am in love with him and he replied back by saying that he wasn't sure what to say but that he admires me for being so honest. He said he does care about me and that I am a wonderful person and friend. That we do have a great friendship and that he loves spending time with me as a friend. As I have typed this I am seeing that friend was used quite a bit here so I guess he is really trying to get that point across.

 

So he ended it by saying that he doesn't want this to ruin our friendship because I am a friend that he can depend on. I am so hurt b/c this has been going on for many years and just 2 weeks ago I was at his house and he told me twice that he loved me. One time while singing I'm Yours and kissing me but then stopped to look into my eyes and say I love you. Now we were drinking so maybe that had something to do with it, after what he had to say I am guessing that is all it was. How do I deal with this? He is not only my best friend but my coworker that I have to see everyday.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 2 weeks later...
juliet Morrison

I just wanted to let you know u are not alone...the same thing happed to me a few weeks ago...but i was reallly drunk when i told him. I cryed for the first time in front of him..it was great.and the next day at work we had to act like nothing happened. Oh and on the side note every one thinks we are dateing anyways for that just adds to it as well.....I really dont have any help for you ...just wanted you to know u are not alone.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Lovebug you have to understand that you let yourself build this up in your head without any concrete evidence that he was into you. You sat around and hoped he would eventually be into you. If you keep telling yourself this, maybe you can see it from an outsiders point of view and help get over the situation that way.

 

The only thing you can do now is get away from him, and stop talking to him for now. You wont be able to get over this if you see him every day. Get another job if you cant handle it. Another thing to try is to start dating someone that might be able to take your mind off this guy.

Link to post
Share on other sites

OP, my sympathies.

 

This....

One time while singing I'm Yours and kissing me but then stopped to look into my eyes and say I love you
is f*cked up. I've had women do this to me and pull the 'we're just friends' card and a lifetime of that treatment causes me to end such 'friendships' immediately as this person is just an attention whore. I don't care if they're drunk. They're still responsible.

 

IMO, someone else can 'be there' for him. You owe him nothing :)

Link to post
Share on other sites

Your friend is sending some terribly mixed messages, which makes me wonder what his agenda may be. I don't know this giuy, so maybe I am way off. But is it possible he is thinking abouit trying to lure you into some kind of FWB situation? If you think he is, DO NOT GO THERE.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Hi Juliet,

Thanks for letting me know that I am not alone, it really is a horrible feeling and I hope for both of our sakes that we can get over this and move on. It's so hard when you work togehter and have to see them every day. At first my friend was joking, making small talk, etc..then he grew cold for a few days and today he called and we talked for about an hour. Then came down and stood in my door way for 20 minutes talking, I finally ended the conversation so he would leave. Good Luck to you, I really hope it all works out for you!!

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Thanks to all of your for your replys!! They were all very helpful. Maybe I did build some of this up in my head, when I read that I thought back to the numerous times that we were together and the way he would act with me and I just don't know. I am so confused. I just need to let it go and try to be a friend to him I guess. It's very hard though, today we were talking and just staring right into each others eyes for what felt like forever and I just finally had to look away and so did he. Then we looked back at each other and we were both silent for a few seconds but I swear I felt something, maybe it was just me feeling it and he is just feeling weird b/c of what I told him. Gosh, why can't this be easier :(

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 2 weeks later...
ciara12step

I feel you 100% love bug .. i'm a guy, and this girl did the same thing to me .. except we did everything that couples do without the title, shes told me she loved me, when shes drunk usually lol , and for 6 months i was on cloud 9, maybe i built it up in my head like u, and then she started changin little by little, getting more distant, doesnt make sense.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I understand why you're hurt. Your friend has been giving you mixed messages, and even laid the stupid, "I don't want to ruin our friendship" line on you. That is one of the oldest, lamest lines in the book. Maybe you need to spend less time around him for a while. But whatever you do, don't get lured into some kind of FWB situation. Guys will sometimes try to play you that way, and you'll just end up getting more hurt in the end.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...