Other Man

[Ballerfamily]

Okay I am going to respond to your post before reading the rest of the comments .. I can speak to you about the reverse .. Why does a single woman fall in love with a married man: He is sweeter, more patient, more communicative, more considerate, humorous, kinder, ... etc etc ..

 

first of all what is so funny. Secondly, MM are that much better then single guys. Why? Why is it a guy like me didn't satify wife stbx needs, but the MM that cheats on his wife is so special. Sounds a bit contrary. Enlighten me cali. Y does the WS want the single/D guy. Wierd scenarios going on here. Confused to say the least. Is this what makes this so much fun? Or is it the human need for something that they shouldnt? Boy am I confused with this thinking.

 

Totally beginning to understand that a man has no chance, especially if a woman is sexual and attractive, and gets the blue balled, male to give her attention. Im gonna be a priest, or start using the quick hand. F this bull****.

Edited March 4, 2010 by Ballerfamily

[Woggle]

Married women are an easy lay and getting them into bed is as simple as ABC. I have friends who mess around with married women and this is the reason why.

[bentnotbroken]

I'm so sorry. I would edit that if I could.

 

 

No need to. It just is possible for OW to get more than just a venomous thoughts.

[califnan]

As funny: I was just responding to OWoman's scenario ..

 

As for my post of the observations on the MM .. I meant it .. compared one mm to hundreds of singles on a few relationship sights ..

 

One poster on another thread said that a spouse can go off with another due to unresolved issues in their marriage. Maybe there are a number of reasons.. It is just something that happens .. I don't know if it mattered if the man in your marriage was single or married .. it was just something that happened, and could have been unexpected - by your wife .. It is the devil's work ..

 

There was a long movie with Sally Field .. I think it was called Change of Seasons .. I will double check the title when I get off here.. and get back to you if it isn't correct.. It was about a woman who was married and fell into a relationship with a man - she lost everything and was working as a housekeeper .. starting all over again ..

 

There are no answers .. just something that happens and may not have had anything to do with you ..

[califnan]

As funny: I was just responding to OWoman's scenario ..

 

As for my post of the observations on the MM .. I meant it .. compared one mm to hundreds of singles on a few relationship sights ..

 

One poster on another thread said that a spouse can go off with another due to unresolved issues in their marriage. Maybe there are a number of reasons.. It is just something that happens .. I don't know if it mattered if the man in your marriage was single or married .. it was just something that happened, and could have been unexpected - by your wife .. It is the devil's work ..

 

There was a long movie with Sally Field .. I think it was called A Cooler Climate . .. I will double check the title when I get off here.. and get back to you if it isn't correct.. It was about a woman who was married and fell into a relationship with a man - she lost everything and was working as a housekeeper .. starting all over again ..

 

There are no answers .. just something that happens and may not have had anything to do with you ..

 

I made the change to my last post ... The movie was called: "A Cooler Climate" 1999 with Sally Field ... You are searching ... I think you might enjoy the movie ..

[Ballerfamily]

Married women are an easy lay and getting them into bed is as simple as ABC. I have friends who mess around with married women and this is the reason why.

 

Okay. MW are easy prey, an they are so sure that the H is the problem, who would lay them and cut off the left testicle to please them. Std's, etc are no big deal. I think every woman should be cheated on, so they can feel the betrayal. Woman are so smart, and know relationships so well, and they are conned by these fellows. I have to almost laugh, f___ marriage. Lets all have fun, and hope we dont end in hell.

 

If a woman is so nurturing, why wouldn't she want to be a good example.

Believe me, I like to look at a nice ass and a good set of legs, like most men. But I want to be example for my teenage son. That keeps me from succumbing to temptation and selfish wants. Plus my wife had those attributes, and i coddled and crooned to her like no other Om could, gave her all kinds of freedom so I wasnt controlling.

 

haha, i have to laugh. I forget im one of those good guys that woman use to crave over. Once you have it, a new chase must begin. The thing i guess i forgot is that my selfish desires werent as important as my boys and wife. Shame on me.

[califnan]

 

Totally beginning to understand that a man has no chance, especially if a woman is sexual and attractive, and gets the blue balled, male to give her attention. Im gonna be a priest, or start using the quick hand. F this bull****.

 

------------------

 

You needn't become a priest (obviously it hasn't helped them much) .. Just be patient ... maybe your marriage will go back together ... or in time you will find the love of your life..

[Woggle]

Okay. MW are easy prey, an they are so sure that the H is the problem, who would lay them and cut off the left testicle to please them. Std's, etc are no big deal. I think every woman should be cheated on, so they can feel the betrayal. Woman are so smart, and know relationships so well, and they are conned by these fellows. I have to almost laugh, f___ marriage. Lets all have fun, and hope we dont end in hell.

 

If a woman is so nurturing, why wouldn't she want to be a good example.

Believe me, I like to look at a nice ass and a good set of legs, like most men. But I want to be example for my teenage son. That keeps me from succumbing to temptation and selfish wants. Plus my wife had those attributes, and i coddled and crooned to her like no other Om could, gave her all kinds of freedom so I wasnt controlling.

 

haha, i have to laugh. I forget im one of those good guys that woman use to crave over. Once you have it, a new chase must begin. The thing i guess i forgot is that my selfish desires werent as important as my boys and wife. Shame on me.

 

I guess you had to learn the hard way. Like I always say now you know what to do the next time around.

[2sunny]

to me, if i am self respecting person, and at first was fooled by WW, i would soon see there were/are serious issues, and would want no part of it.

 

MI

 

not sure how I'm painting anything to fullfill my needs, I just don't understand wanting MW and all her baggage. I understand after D an so forth, and she is healed.

 

I am sorry if this offends OM, but I dont think you are in a good place setttling for these scraps. You have to be as broken as her. You have to be in as bad a shape as her, an if you think differently, God love you.

 

If a MW was telling me her sob story, i would run for the hills. What is certain, is that most OM's have no idea what they getting into to. And you are the knight is shining armour.

 

I think what i'm seeing is actually what ive always thought. You deserve each other.

 

OM, i understand going after an attractive MW, if she is pursuing you, and she is a happy go lucky person.

 

My wife is the saddest looking woman i have ever seen for what she has done to me and her family. She walks the halls of her tiny apt. every night in fear of where her life is going. Wow, if i was OM, i couldnt wait to take this happy woman out. DO YOU GUYS SEE THE DIFFERENCE?

 

She is going to blame you eventually for preying on her (welcome to my life) its not gonna be her fault.haha Its gonna be yours. And now the H is looking to get a pc of your ass, at the very least, embarrass your ass in public. THIS IS WORTH IT FOR A PIECE OF ASS.

 

What I read on my stbx phone, was a winey man begging for attention and not getting it when he wanted. A single woman could give you attention any timeyou wanted.

 

believe me, there are men that see a woman like this and automatically process "weak, vulnerable woman that i can take advantage of"

 

but that is generally not what we see posted here from the married spouse or the OW/OM.

 

they generally post how much they want to be happy. or trying to figure out what happy might look like for them - whether in a marriage or with the affair person. sometimes there are postings on how to keep both going without getting caught.

 

sometimes the OM/OW has no idea at the start that the person they are seeing is actually married.

[califnan]

Okay. MW are easy prey, an they are so sure that the H is the problem, who would lay them and cut off the left testicle to please them. Std's, etc are no big deal. I think every woman should be cheated on, so they can feel the betrayal. Woman are so smart, and know relationships so well, and they are conned by these fellows. I have to almost laugh, f___ marriage. Lets all have fun, and hope we dont end in hell.

 

If a woman is so nurturing, why wouldn't she want to be a good example.

Believe me, I like to look at a nice ass and a good set of legs, like most men. But I want to be example for my teenage son. That keeps me from succumbing to temptation and selfish wants. Plus my wife had those attributes, and i coddled and crooned to her like no other Om could, gave her all kinds of freedom so I wasnt controlling.

 

haha, i have to laugh. I forget im one of those good guys that woman use to crave over. Once you have it, a new chase must begin. The thing i guess i forgot is that my selfish desires werent as important as my boys and wife. Shame on me.

 

 

-------------------------

 

I have been on the other side as a woman who was cheated on ...He divorced me after 22 yrs - and the three of them (H, OW, Attorney) took me out of a home that is now worth over a million .. into an apt with my sons.. Probably happens a lot more with women than men ..

 

You did the right thing in not letting yourself fall into temptation .. my husband even cheated his sons in the end .. If you loose the respect of your children - you have lost everything ..

 

Go to church .. probably plenty of nice women there..

[pureinheart]

Okay. MW are easy prey, an they are so sure that the H is the problem, who would lay them and cut off the left testicle to please them. Std's, etc are no big deal. I think every woman should be cheated on, so they can feel the betrayal. Woman are so smart, and know relationships so well, and they are conned by these fellows. I have to almost laugh, f___ marriage. Lets all have fun, and hope we dont end in hell.

 

If a woman is so nurturing, why wouldn't she want to be a good example.

Believe me, I like to look at a nice ass and a good set of legs, like most men. But I want to be example for my teenage son. That keeps me from succumbing to temptation and selfish wants. Plus my wife had those attributes, and i coddled and crooned to her like no other Om could, gave her all kinds of freedom so I wasnt controlling.

 

haha, i have to laugh. I forget im one of those good guys that woman use to crave over. Once you have it, a new chase must begin. The thing i guess i forgot is that my selfish desires werent as important as my boys and wife. Shame on me.

 

BF...my thoughts and prayers are with you. I don't know how to say this and am sure you will take this totally the wrong way, although the best place to take the anger out would be the infidelity board...OM/OW board will just increase your anger, the infidelity board could possibly decrease it.

 

Have you started any type of councelling yet?

 

The M is over, and in order for you to have a new life, which you communicated you desire all of this hatred and anger should be dealt with first, as you will turn off future relationships.

 

I know you might hate me for what I am about to say, although better for you to hate me now if what I have to say is the truth and it helps you later.

 

Only you know the truth...here are some possibilities that I have experienced.

 

I left one of my H's because of his anger, I forgave the infidelity, although the anger really was the deal breaker because it was abusive.

 

Most of the time the H points the finger at the W and vice versa...both pointing fingers at the other and no one takes responsibility for their actions, thus we have D...the big D.

 

My exDM was so angry all of the time, I had to walk because he was abusive.

 

What I find to be true from these boards and my friends that have survived not only infidelity (as there are other things that break up M's) is both come to a place of having the mirror turned on them and both S recognizing that no one is perfect, our S will fail us at some point in some way....and not expecting their S to make them happy.

 

I understand your anger, and I bet your exW has some too for you.

 

I say this for myself also...it is so easy for me to cut someone else down, see their faults and short comings, yet when it comes to me...I am innocent.

 

Now there are some really weird and abusive people out there (I find all of them so you ladies have to worry....lol).

 

BF you were M'ed to her for over 25yrs, if she was the horrible person that she seems to you right now you would NEVER have stayed with her.

 

I think you are using the anger so you won't love her anymore and that won't help...recognizing that you do and did love her will help you move on and not be stuck in the anger.

 

Good Luck BF...this was in no way to cut you down...((((((hugggs))))))

[pureinheart]

-------------------------

 

I have been on the other side as a woman who was cheated on ...He divorced me after 22 yrs - and the three of them (H, OW, Attorney) took me out of a home that is now worth over a million .. into an apt with my sons.. Probably happens a lot more with women than men ..

 

You did the right thing in not letting yourself fall into temptation .. my husband even cheated his sons in the end .. If you loose the respect of your children - you have lost everything ..

 

Go to church .. probably plenty of nice women there..

 

I am sooo sorry...to both you and BF...

 

There have only been a couple of R's in my entire life where there was no infidelity, so I do understand...I just didn't really care and moved on...if they didnot want me, then so be it and I was gone...just like that...a week tops to heal.

 

Both of my children didnot have an active father in their life because "I" was the problem...ok, if that is what they choose to believe and they can live with that, then fine. I had no problem taking the bull by the horns and creating a world for me and my kids and supporting them financially quite well.

 

I have made many mistakes, in fact the Apostle Paul communicates to us that he was "the chief of all sinners", because I respect his authority, I am the "second chief of all sinners"...lol. Most used me as the fall guy because very rarely was I sneaky, I did what I wanted, when I wanted (within reason of course). My ex's lied straight up to my kids saying I was the problem, and I agreed...

 

Now that my kids are 29 and 25, they know what the truth was...who stayed up till 2am in the morning either lecturing or helping with projects/homework/councelling...when I had to get up at 5 am to work a 10 to 12 hr day. I didn't have time to heal, to be angry and I'm grateful for that.

 

Miss CA, you are a classy lady....and I'm so glad to be in the same part of the world and country as you....BTW, I have just returned back to church, I have church everywhere all of the time, yet there is a particular church that I truely love to be "in the place"....

 

BF, I do understand your anger....although you may not have much time for it anymore...

[califnan]

I am sooo sorry...to both you and BF...

 

There have only been a couple of R's in my entire life where there was no infidelity, so I do understand...I just didn't really care and moved on...if they didnot want me, then so be it and I was gone...just like that...a week tops to heal.

 

Both of my children didnot have an active father in their life because "I" was the problem...ok, if that is what they choose to believe and they can live with that, then fine. I had no problem taking the bull by the horns and creating a world for me and my kids and supporting them financially quite well.

 

I have made many mistakes, in fact the Apostle Paul communicates to us that he was "the chief of all sinners", because I respect his authority, I am the "second chief of all sinners"...lol. Most used me as the fall guy because very rarely was I sneaky, I did what I wanted, when I wanted (within reason of course). My ex's lied straight up to my kids saying I was the problem, and I agreed...

 

Now that my kids are 29 and 25, they know what the truth was...who stayed up till 2am in the morning either lecturing or helping with projects/homework/councelling...when I had to get up at 5 am to work a 10 to 12 hr day. I didn't have time to heal, to be angry and I'm grateful for that.

 

Miss CA, you are a classy lady....and I'm so glad to be in the same part of the world and country as you....BTW, I have just returned back to church, I have church everywhere all of the time, yet there is a particular church that I truely love to be "in the place"....

 

BF, I do understand your anger....although you may not have much time for it anymore...

 

 

-------------------

 

Hi Pure... Am so happy for you that you have returned to church ... I have not .. would probably like to serve if I did .. i.e. try singing in a choir .. Just cannot take the time right now as my weekends are too condensed and vital .. and I really have not missed church that much, excepting for meeting people.. (Internet is great though, ha) ..

 

My divorce was 25 years ago - My marriage ended primarily because it did not have GOD in it .. I became saved afterward ... My 42 yr old twin sons learned just a few years ago that my husband's widow - on that 2nd marriage .. had my H write them out of his will to the extent that they could not reap from their grandfather's life estate which is just closing..

 

Anyone on here who is reading this (I should start a thread) .. Please don't let those later marriages take you away from your family .. A new wife has no earned or entitlement to that that rightfully belongs to your Offspring..

 

I am on these OM/OW threads because of a recent development with a MM former classmate who contacted me a few yrs ago .. God is good .. He has given me insight .. while all of you are my support group .. thank you ..

[Ballerfamily]

BF...my thoughts and prayers are with you. I don't know how to say this and am sure you will take this totally the wrong way, although the best place to take the anger out would be the infidelity board...OM/OW board will just increase your anger, the infidelity board could possibly decrease it.

 

Have you started any type of councelling yet?

 

The M is over, and in order for you to have a new life, which you communicated you desire all of this hatred and anger should be dealt with first, as you will turn off future relationships.

 

I know you might hate me for what I am about to say, although better for you to hate me now if what I have to say is the truth and it helps you later.

 

Only you know the truth...here are some possibilities that I have experienced.

 

I left one of my H's because of his anger, I forgave the infidelity, although the anger really was the deal breaker because it was abusive.

 

Most of the time the H points the finger at the W and vice versa...both pointing fingers at the other and no one takes responsibility for their actions, thus we have D...the big D.

 

My exDM was so angry all of the time, I had to walk because he was abusive.

 

What I find to be true from these boards and my friends that have survived not only infidelity (as there are other things that break up M's) is both come to a place of having the mirror turned on them and both S recognizing that no one is perfect, our S will fail us at some point in some way....and not expecting their S to make them happy.

 

I understand your anger, and I bet your exW has some too for you.

 

I say this for myself also...it is so easy for me to cut someone else down, see their faults and short comings, yet when it comes to me...I am innocent.

 

Now there are some really weird and abusive people out there (I find all of them so you ladies have to worry....lol).

 

BF you were M'ed to her for over 25yrs, if she was the horrible person that she seems to you right now you would NEVER have stayed with her.

 

I think you are using the anger so you won't love her anymore and that won't help...recognizing that you do and did love her will help you move on and not be stuck in the anger.

 

Good Luck BF...this was in no way to cut you down...((((((hugggs))))))

 

I appreciate your thoughts

 

I guess i'm angry for my boys more then anything. My wife is a good person. She just has issues. We have alot of good friends that are close with her and I. They cant believe what she has done.

 

I am surely at fault for alot of things. I own it. I'm really sad that my stbx is gone. I miss the old wife that is a loving, caring,empathetic woman.

 

She got involved in the wrong crowd. MW hanging almost entirely with single/divorced co-eds, is not good judgement. 90% have had affairs, multiple times.

 

She wants to do things that MW cant. Cake Eater. Its sad. It is big time mid-life crisis. One thing I have learned, she has to go through the journey. Only then will the light shine down upon her.

 

I would just like her to be happy. If this makes her happy, great. I dont like seeing her make every one around her miserable. We all feel sorry for her, and cater to her. Im a Christian. I will not turn my back. I will turn the other cheek. Doesnt necessarily mean I want to live with her again.

 

I am on the road to healing and happiness. I love her and my boys unconditionally. I always will.

 

Back to thread:

 

OM, I want to hear from you. I will not judge even if it hurts my feelings.

 

so far: easy sex, no strings, knight hood. anything else?

[Doing it Since '78]

I appreciate your thoughts

 

I guess i'm angry for my boys more then anything. My wife is a good person. She just has issues. We have alot of good friends that are close with her and I. They cant believe what she has done.

 

I am surely at fault for alot of things. I own it. I'm really sad that my stbx is gone. I miss the old wife that is a loving, caring,empathetic woman.

 

She got involved in the wrong crowd. MW hanging almost entirely with single/divorced co-eds, is not good judgement. 90% have had affairs, multiple times.

 

She wants to do things that MW cant. Cake Eater. Its sad. It is big time mid-life crisis. One thing I have learned, she has to go through the journey. Only then will the light shine down upon her.

 

I would just like her to be happy. If this makes her happy, great. I dont like seeing her make every one around her miserable. We all feel sorry for her, and cater to her. Im a Christian. I will not turn my back. I will turn the other cheek. Doesnt necessarily mean I want to live with her again.

 

I am on the road to healing and happiness. I love her and my boys unconditionally. I always will.

 

Back to thread:

 

OM, I want to hear from you. I will not judge even if it hurts my feelings.

 

so far: easy sex, no strings, knight hood. anything else?

 

BF,

 

Im not an other man but a BS. And all I can say is the OM my stbxw left me for was a true scumbag, but was he really? He I imagined showed her a little attention, and she I imagine did not shy away from his advances. She was a high level teacher, and this kid was/is a janitor at her school. He tried his hand at something that should have been out of his league, and the poor sap struck gold.

 

The bottom line is when the episode (at least the one I know about) went down, it involved her making out with the guy at the christmas party (in front of her co-workers and sub-ordinates, enough so one of her "friends" told her that they need to get their own room), and ended with her driving him back to his 2 bedroom apartment that he shares with his mother, brother and two kids when he has them on weekends, in a snow storm, and giving him total control over her body and spirit.

 

Usually, I have a bad intentions in my mind for any joker who messes with anothers man wife, however in this case, I really hold no ill-will towards this guy. She offered herself to him, he didn't have to spend a dime, she drove him around to his house, where she gave it away to him. And from my understanding, she even carted this joker back and forth to work after D-Day (45 miles each way in traffic) for a nice period of time until her money dried up. Oh I forgot, not only does the dude not have a car, his license is suspended for failure to pay child support amongst other criminal convictions he has. How can I get mad at that? His life sucks, and my STBXW has found the perfect match for her sorry a$$. He can have her, seriously! She has tried turning a corner, and pretty much has done all but come back to me crying and begging to sort this chit out, but eff that, you wanted a thug, and by golly you shall have one!

 

He was the sucker who got a game ran on him, even though I imagine he thinks he was in control of her. She knew exactly what she was doing before, during and after she did it. I give her no passes. Bottom line if it wasn't him, it would have been the bell hop who told her how nice her hair looked who got the pu$$y.

 

It seems that you are obsessing over the OM, when at the bottom of the issue, unless this guy slipped her a roofie, and date raped her, then she was the one who gave him the pu$$y, he didn't take chit, the only thing he took was what was more than likely offered to him, or even better yet thrown at him on a silver platter

 

Not to mention obsessing over the c0cksucker who is/was banging your WS is a waste of YOUR energy, and will drive you batchit crazy, let it go

Edited March 9, 2010 by Doing it Since '78

[califnan]

BF,

 

 

Usually, I have a bad intentions in my mind for any joker who messes with anothers man wife, however in this case, I really hold no ill-will towards this guy. She offered herself to him, he didn't have to spend a dime, she drove him around to his house, where she gave it away to him. And from my understanding, she even carted this joker back and forth to work after D-Day (45 miles each way in traffic) for a nice period of time until her money dried up. Oh I forgot, not only does the dude not have a car, his license is suspended for failure to pay child support amongst other criminal convictions he has. How can I get mad at that? His life sucks, and my STBXW has found the perfect match for her sorry a$$. He can have her, seriously! She has tried turning a corner, and pretty much has done all but come back to me crying and begging to sort this chit out, but eff that, you wanted a thug, and by golly you shall have one!

 

He was the sucker who got a game ran on him, even though I imagine he thinks he was in control of her. She knew exactly what she was doing before, during and after she did it. I give her no passes. Bottom line if it wasn't him, it would have been the bell hop who told her how nice her hair looked who got the pu$$y.

 

It seems that you are obsessing over the OM, when at the bottom of the issue, unless this guy slipped her a roofie, and date raped her, then she was the one who gave him the pu$$y, he didn't take chit, the only thing he took was what was more than likely offered to him, or even better yet thrown at him on a silver platter

 

Not to mention obsessing over the c0cksucker who is/was banging your WS is a waste of YOUR energy, and will drive you batchit crazy, let it go

 

 

----------------------

 

Hello 78; After reading this post, I went back and read your original Febraury story .. I see in this post that "she is trying to turn a corner"... That seemed to have happened sooner than one would think .. Hope you are doing better and your mother's health - and especially your wonderful children.. You are a very good father and I hurt for your children missing their mother, and probably feeling left by their mother - who has gone onto a selfish time .. You are quite right in your original post that you have done well as far as being able to keep the children with you the majority of the time and to not have to leave your home with a boyfriend moving in.. And monetarily, I hope you will be able to receive the child support money from her .. I wish you the best and the continued protection of your children ..

[JustJoe]

Baller, I entered the affair because my MW was/is a wicked hot woman, and I wanted her. At first it was all sex, but later the emotional aspect became as important as the sex. I never wanted to be an OM and I'm in the process of getting out. No. I never worried about the "wrath", of her husband. I am a professional soldier, he is a rich accountant, nuf said.

[Doing it Since '78]

----------------------

 

Hello 78; After reading this post, I went back and read your original Febraury story .. I see in this post that "she is trying to turn a corner"... That seemed to have happened sooner than one would think .. Hope you are doing better and your mother's health - and especially your wonderful children.. You are a very good father and I hurt for your children missing their mother, and probably feeling left by their mother - who has gone onto a selfish time .. You are quite right in your original post that you have done well as far as being able to keep the children with you the majority of the time and to not have to leave your home with a boyfriend moving in.. And monetarily, I hope you will be able to receive the child support money from her .. I wish you the best and the continued protection of your children ..

 

Thansk for the support! Her turning the corner has more to do with not having the money or fun she imagined would be out there. She has begun to realize that life on the wild side is only fun when someone is being hurt at her expense.

 

I'm not sweating her about her choices, her mother isn't and the kids whom barely see her have moments, but other than that they are ok. The lady at daycare and my mother see her kids more than she does. The best thing I could ever do (outside of reignited my relationship with God, and checking out this site and others) was to understand that this was more about her than me, or the kids.

 

She has begun offering me her schedule for her week via email ahead of time, I just hit ignore. I could never go back to someone who could easily leave her husband and family in a lurch for a dream about living it up with a thug. I guess once the reality hit that the life she wanted was going to be on her dime, she began to smarten up. Sorry but life is too short for her jumping out there and coming back.

 

Our final D hearing is at the end of this month, so it will be nice to see if her breakdown moment comes before then, but since I have zero trust for her, it wouldn't even matter.

[Doing it Since '78]

Baller, I entered the affair because my MW was/is a wicked hot woman, and I wanted her. At first it was all sex, but later the emotional aspect became as important as the sex. I never wanted to be an OM and I'm in the process of getting out. No. I never worried about the "wrath", of her husband. I am a professional soldier, he is a rich accountant, nuf said.

 

JJ,

 

Please dont get so cocky and comfortable regarding her rich husbands "wrath". As tough as you think you are, you are no match for power, or money. You have no idea who or what he knows, that could destroy your career life. Enjoy the lady (while you have her), but their is no need think that you are the "better man" in that scenario. You are just HER escape from her real life, and are just as lost and in a fog as she is.

 

My advice for what it's worth, enjoy your time with her, but you should start letting it go, and start putting logic ahead of emotion. It will not end pretty for either of you (in the short term or long term)

 

Peace

[JustJoe]

You're right "78". I shouldn't be so cocky. Not because he could in any way harm me, because he's pretty much a doormat for her, and weak, but because , after all she is HIS wife, so I should be a little more respectful. She treats him like dirt, so I've fallen in to that way of thinking too. It's wrong.

[Doing it Since '78]

You're right "78". I shouldn't be so cocky. Not because he could in any way harm me, because he's pretty much a doormat for her, and weak, but because , after all she is HIS wife, so I should be a little more respectful. She treats him like dirt, so I've fallen in to that way of thinking too. It's wrong.

 

Dude, that is hard to hear. And I bet at the end of the day, he probably is an every day regular guy, like me or you. He just so happened to hook up with a scandalous foul pig for a wife. I bet dollars to donuts that this guy in real life is nothing at all like the picture she has painted of him.

 

And from what you say she has done a great job of depicting him as a POS, while she is laying in your bed, giving away his goodies to you. Even to the point where you are taking her side against him, a guy I imagine you have never even met in person. Like I said earlier, she is using YOU, not the other way around. And never forget, what goes around comes around. As fun as this situtaion may be to you right now, you have your day coming. Not saying it in a nasty way, but just saying.

 

Stand up, take your balls back, and drop her. You have compromised your intergity to be with her. How do I know this? If it was as fun as you would like, you would not be here posting on this site, as you would be to busy wearing that a$$ out. The whole thing is/has been wrong for a long time. I can't convince you to do what's right, because you know it's wrong. It lessens the hurt when your own future wife is treating you like she is doing him. Because please beleive your deeds will be returned to you in spades. And weak or doormat or whatever, a wounded animal can do just as much damage as healthy one, especially if cornered

 

Peace

[In_Repair]

I'm a separated man who has been seeing a married woman. I stopped the affair a few months ago, but she continually tries to get it going full steam again. I had just been cheated on myself and I wasn't out looking for the opportunity to do that to another man, and I'm still not sure exactly why I did it. It was just so easy, and didn't really feel like I thought an affair would. She was there for me in any way that I needed her. The only reasons it really had to end was that I was tired of being an OM, and I don't want to break up someone else's marriage.

 

As far as the questions like why I would live that life, or whether I fear the husband... those are things you don't really consider in depth at the start. You just open your eyes one day and you are in that life, it's not really a choice that you even think about making when your head is in the clouds. I did refuse to be the classic OM though. I lived life as a single man and I continued to see other women while I was seeing her, if only for my own sanity at times. The angry husband? Maybe. I guess he could always shoot me...

 

Don't assume that your wife got fooled by some sweet talker. She opened that door all by herself. There are just as many willing married women running around as there are men who chase after them.

[Doing it Since '78]

Don't assume that your wife got fooled by some sweet talker. She opened that door all by herself. There are just as many willing married women running around as there are men who chase after them.

 

That is dead on right there.

[JustJoe]

I'm sorry "78", I told on another thread, that I ended the affair.

[Doing it Since '78]

I'm sorry "78", I told on another thread, that I ended the affair.

 

My fault bro, didn't mean to preach to you, but I know it was a hard decision, but necessary one