Aaaah! I'm going insane!

[jiggawhat]

I'm gonna summarize this the best I can:

I started my freshman year of college in September. Within a week I met and befriended a girl, and soon I became very attracted to her. So I tried to flirt with her, slowly get to know her better. Soon, though, I started getting the feeling she wasn't into it, as she was first ignoring me and then openly hostile. So I left her alone. But I became really good friends with the same people she became really good friends with, and so I still saw her all the time. I tried to just be affable, and back off, but soon she started warming up to me again. So, still attracted to her, I made another go. She suddenly got hostile again, making fun of me every chance she got...weirdly. This really hurt, and I resolved to completely give up on her, and just look for other girls. I even went on a couple dates with this other girl, though nothing really came of it. Meanwhile, she started to make other friends, and we saw less of each other. Then she started hanging with me again, and being really cool, and just as I was tempted to try one more time, she said how she had a crush on this other guy she befriended. I was dissapointed, but we were friends again. Up until about 2 weeks before break, when she started ignoring me again. Over break, I confided in my friends in my ongoing interest in her, and they told me to give up, which seemed easy since I wasn't seeing her at all all of break. Then I came back this week, and she started being uncharacteristically cool, going out of her way to spend time with me. I'm doing my best to reciprocate, and even my friends are noticing that she's tolerating me more.

 

Are you confused? So am I! I'm really, really confused. Basically, everytime I think she's warming up to me she finds new friends and I don't see her for a week. And everytime I'm ready to move on, and look for someone new, she finds me again and seems really into me.

 

I don't particularly want to stick with this carousel. And I really don't want to get hurt by her again if she leaves again. But I really, really like her, not just physically, but as a person, and I feel like we're a great match for each other. I couldn't live with myself if I thought I had turned her away just as she was ready for me. It's especially hard to let go when she lives mere feet from me, and is in one of my classes.

 

How do I deal with all this nonsense?

[b0n1tA]

Ohhhh....My......God......

Gurlz r like that, they like to play hard to get, they like to tease guyz, so that the guy would want them more! And then wen they have them, they'll appreciate the gurl more.

I really dont want to tell u to do sumfin, just in case im wrong!

 

But if i were u i'd tell her i wana c her sumtime, on PURPOSE! she might say that she'll think about it, to keep u in suspense for a while.

 

If she says she doesn't feel the same, there r alwayz other gurlz, maybe u just weren'r s'posed to be with this gurl.

[moimeme]

Is there any particular reason you think she'll be different this time than she has been the last several times? She clearly has some issue or other. Could be she's afraid of commitment. Could be she likes to keep a lot of guys dangling with her game because it makes her feel potent. Whatever the reason, it's a little crazy to think that this established pattern will change anytime soon, don't you think?

[Arabess]

It seems to me she is only interested in you.....when she isn't with someone else. That would make you a 'time filler'.....and NO....I wouldn't reduce myself to being that for anyone.

 

There are people out there who just 'need' to have someone giving them flirting attention. If someone new isn't feeding their ego....they go back to tried and true....till someone new comes along. It's like watching an old video which is handy....till you get a chance to go to the video store to rent a new release.

 

If you want a REAL relationship, find a person who is looking for something with a little more consistency and depth than this girl is. I'm not saying she is a bad person.....I've been guilty of playing the field, more than a little, myself. Believe me, if she was really interested in you.....she wouldn't flip-flop back and forth.